nickf100 Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I've been online dating for a little bit now and I've noticed a pattern: I tend to get too attached to some girls wayy to early on. It's happened like 4 times in the past 8 months ; 1 of them I didn't even meet in person. None of them really turned into anything,. It's a huge waste of time and just a bad feeling when it doesn't work out. I find my self falling into the same trap now with someone I can't help it. Does this go away with time as I become more jaded? Lol . can anyone else relate? if you do please leave some tips on how to avoid this trap.
hhatesboys Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 ROFL! Online dating is seriously crap. I don't think texting for a long time before you meet is a good idea just because of that. In my case it has been that I think I have chemistry with the person, but then we meet and I'm not attracted to him... And I would have never given him a chance had I met him in person before the texting. Then I feel like I have to "break up" with him even though all we did was text for a week. It is awkward. I have also had a bunch of guys ghost out on me before I even meet them. Which I always feel is unfair. You can't judge a person by a poorly worded text or whatever. I'm very sarcastic but sometimes it comes off wrong if I send a badly worded text. But with OLD you are picking out a person based on a set of pre-determined credentials that have nothing to do with anything. People don't know what they want. Almost all of the guys I've had actual relationships with, I would have eliminated on a dating site for some dumb reason or another. So knowing that... how do you decide who to meet or not? Impossible. So yeah, don't text for a really long time. Don't get attached or start forming a pseudo-relationship. Someone is going to be disappointed that way.
Zippy2000 Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I have to ask you Nick why you are attached too easily? This is dating so you dont know any of these people. I d day maybe start investing in people youre dating after a 3 or 4th date. Remember its only dating and people can chnage their minds. Why? Well they dont know you that well so they dont invest that much until they decide they like you. You should do the same. Do not invest too much too soon.
PegNosePete Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 Meet sooner rather than later. I usually met within a week of initial message. My usual timetable was first message sent sunday, couple exchanged monday-tuesday, phone wednesday to arrange a meeting for friday or saturday. Don't put all your eggs in one basket. I sent initial messages to around 10-15, got 3-4 responses of which 1-2 would turn into a meeting. Then repeat the next week until you find someone who you want to take on a 2nd date. 2
hannahsmith Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I do that too. I also judge people for things that I would never do in real life too. I think the best thing to do is meet up as early as possible to base your judgements on what you see for real.
Mrin Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 My suggestions: - meet quickly - multidate - nothing is real until you meet in person 4
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