Girl all of a sudden being distant

[RyanBeynolds]

So I was recently cheated on in my first relationship and I have been playing the field for a few months. I was at a college football game and see this very attractive girl standing by herself on a fence afterwards. I approach her and ask why she's by herself and we hit it off and I invite her to join my friends and I at the bar. We talk the whole time and actually end up kissing and exchanging numbers. I already felt a connection so I didn't want to disrespect her and give her the wrong idea by asking her home when in reality I just wanted more time with her.

 

So I end up texting her the next morning and I didn't get the response. A day later, she responds and I felt a rush of joy. She is a cheerleader at another university so I think that makes me like her even that much more for having that dedication, and she is very smart and has goals.

 

So we start texting a lot and I kept asking her to hang out. Not just at my house or hers, but I invited her to the zoo with my friends, a NFL game, a party, a bar, etc. She kept giving excuses and finally agreed to get dinner with me. It went extremely well and we have a ton in common, and I already feel like I'm starting to like her.

 

She goes on vacation for Christmas and we are texting a lot, just talking about each other. I don't constantly text her, and on Christmas or her Mom's birthday I just said "Hey I hope you have a merry Christmas I'll talk to you tomorrow"

 

I kept giving her ideas of stuff we can do and then all of a sudden a few days ago she starts ignoring me. I didn't blow her cell phone up but asked a few times what the problem was. She finally fesses up and said she feels pressured and it's making her stressed when I'm asking her to hang out. WHAT?! I've never met a girl who was bothered by a guy wanting to spend time with her and give her attention.

 

So we kind of got into it back and forth telling our sides and it ended with her saying that she will let me know when she can hang out. I just said ok whatever and I'm not expecting anything more from her.

 

I just don't get it. I feel like I'm experienced with girls, I did everything perfect and did not say one wrong thing and then this happens. I'm glad I got an answer out of her but being ignored for 3 days from a girl I was beginning to like really kills my morale.

[RyanBeynolds]

There is not a secret method of seduction that is going to work on every girl. The problem here is not that you did something wrong, but that she was not all that interested to begin with. You say she is a cheerleader, so I will assume she is attractive, right? My guess is you are one of many guys hitting on her, and she likes one or some of those guys better than you.

 

If a woman is really into you, it won't be so much of a trouble to get her to spend time with you. Once she started playing those games, you should have walked away.

 

I don't know, she was messaging me the other day upset that I didn't kiss her after the date. But then she was telling me tonight that I was moving too fast and she knows I start grad school in a few months so I'm guessing that kind of killed my chances too. It's been on my mind but I'm trying to live in the moment which is why I'm trying to spend time with her as much as I can. I'll just wait for her to make the move, but I'm not expecting it unfortunately.

 

And I don't know, I'm pretty sure she's interested. I'm not saying that because I'm too prideful to admit, because I've definitely been rejected by girls. But she texted back a day later after I first got her number. She was making it a big deal that I wanted to hang out with her after essentially meeting her at a bar, so I asked why she even texted me back then even though it was a whole day later, and she said she had to think about it and thought I was different and liked talking with me.

 

I'm pretty sure she has some baggage, though. She seems to have been through a lot with her last guy treating her like trash, and I think she's still worried about that