Sugarkane715 Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 My friend Mike and I have been friends for 7 years. We never dated or anything but we have always been pretty close as friends. I never thought of him in a romantic way and as far as I am aware he never thought of me that way either. Recently, Mike started being flirty with me but he knew I was in a relationship that was coming to an end. Friends started noticing that he was acting like he was interested and would ask him if he was and he would always say no. One night, after a few drinks he kissed me and told me that he recently started developing feelings for me. I said that I was starting to feel the same way but needed to figure out what I was doing with my relationship. I wound up going on a break with my current guy and told Mike all about it. He said he was happy that I made a decision and he said he liked how he felt when he was with me and enjoyed whatever was developing between us but was nervous that he was the rebound and thought our feelings weren't real because we never had them before. Then I got busy before the holidays with my job and I wasn't able to see him. When we did see each other he seemed distant. I asked him why our dynamic seemed different and he said he realized we had too much going on and needed time to figure out what we both want while just being friends for a while. I honestly am heartbroken because I feel for Mike very hard and I took this as he moved on and just is trying to be kind and not say it. We haven't spoken much since that talk 2 weeks ago but has asked for me in groups when I am not around. We went to a party that a mutual friend threw and we were ok there but I was a little stand offish because I am hurt. He kept staring at me and watching me the whole party and kept trying to get my attention. I don't want to throw myself at him but I don't know how to act. For NYE we both were invited to a party but idk if I should go. Did he give me a line? How do you interpret this and what should I do? Move on?
Redhead14 Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 My friend Mike and I have been friends for 7 years. We never dated or anything but we have always been pretty close as friends. I never thought of him in a romantic way and as far as I am aware he never thought of me that way either. Recently, Mike started being flirty with me but he knew I was in a relationship that was coming to an end. Friends started noticing that he was acting like he was interested and would ask him if he was and he would always say no. One night, after a few drinks he kissed me and told me that he recently started developing feelings for me. I said that I was starting to feel the same way but needed to figure out what I was doing with my relationship. I wound up going on a break with my current guy and told Mike all about it. He said he was happy that I made a decision and he said he liked how he felt when he was with me and enjoyed whatever was developing between us but was nervous that he was the rebound and thought our feelings weren't real because we never had them before. Then I got busy before the holidays with my job and I wasn't able to see him. When we did see each other he seemed distant. I asked him why our dynamic seemed different and he said he realized we had too much going on and needed time to figure out what we both want while just being friends for a while. I honestly am heartbroken because I feel for Mike very hard and I took this as he moved on and just is trying to be kind and not say it. We haven't spoken much since that talk 2 weeks ago but has asked for me in groups when I am not around. We went to a party that a mutual friend threw and we were ok there but I was a little stand offish because I am hurt. He kept staring at me and watching me the whole party and kept trying to get my attention. I don't want to throw myself at him but I don't know how to act. For NYE we both were invited to a party but idk if I should go. Did he give me a line? How do you interpret this and what should I do? Move on? Sounds to me like he does/did like you and maybe thought it would be nice to date you but only as a pipe dream. When the possibility became a reality, he backed off because he really doesn't want a relationship with anyone. Not only that, you broke it off with your boyfriend and he doesn't want to "appear" to be the cause of or instigator of that. You've broken up with your boyfriend more or less and it will take time for you to get a grip on that. I'd say he's being wise to step back until he knows it's really over with the other guy. It's too fresh and you may end up going back with the boyfriend.
Gaeta Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 I said that I was starting to feel the same way but needed to figure out what I was doing with my relationship. I wound up going on a break with my current guy and told Mike all about it Can you really blame Mike. Taking a break with your boyfriend does not mean you are definitely broken up. It means you are sorting your feelings. Huge chances you'll go back to your boyfriend so why would Mike throw himself in the fire for you? Break up with the boyfriend for real. If Mike comes back then good, if not at least you got out of a relationship that was over anyway. 1
smackie9 Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 posting the same thread over and over, asking the same questions is only going to get you the same answers.
Alamo657 Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 Did he give me a line? How do you interpret this and what should I do? Move on? You shouldn't mention your lovelife or spend alone time with guys orbiting around you unless you mean to enter a relationship with them. So now he gave you a hint he wants a relationship with you, it's up to you do answer that hint, or not. However, it probably means your "friendship" (which was most likely built upon his desire to sleep with you, and your own attraction toward him) will come to an end.
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