Superman2024 Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 I'm used to using dating sites like Christian Mingle, OKC, and Match where there's quite a bit of info about someone, but on Tinder it's completely different. Often girls have little or nothing written and just a few pics. On the other sites it's much easier to start a conversation and keep it going using common interests from their profile. Usually I'll exchange a few messages with a girl, ask to exchange numbers, and text the next day asking them out. I'm actually looking for a relationship though I've heard Tinder is more for hookups. This may be quite a task but there are more attractive girls on there. I imagine some just want more Instagram followers or want their ego boosted too. Is there a different way to approach things on Tinder? One girl I matched with recently had nothing written about her so I asked what some of her interests were and she didn't answer. I matched with another girl today who also had a blank profile with a few pics. After a few messages back and forth I went ahead and asked for her number and she gave it to me, but I feel like I know almost nothing about her. I plan to text her tomorrow, learn a bit more, and ask her out. Do most girls on there just want to skip the chatting and go straight for a date? I'm thinking my method on the other sites don't really apply there!
hhatesboys Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 Sounds like maybe Tinder is just not your platform. LOL. I don't blame you, I write stuff in my tinder and guys almost never mention what I wrote. So I started writing weird stuff and still no one has said anything. So yeah, it is all about looks for sure. I live in Las Vegas so half of the guys I match with are in town for the weekend and just want to hook up. As for the other half, they are terrible. I've never actually followed through on a Tinder date, but I have on OKC and POF. So, I do not know how guys use Tinder... but in my experience it is not a good place to meet someone unless you just want a cheap hookup. I still have an account and use it when I get bored, thinking MAYBE you never know where you will meet someone, right?
SwordofFlame Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 I usually exchange a few messages than ask to meet up. It's not any different than what I do on OKC. If you want a lot more info before meeting, you could certainly keep messaging.
Author Superman2024 Posted December 30, 2015 Author Posted December 30, 2015 Is it pretty typical to ask for a number before meeting on Tinder? It seems too easy for someone to disappear on there so I like to get that. Normally I text to set up the first date and like having that in case someone can't make it or is running late. I like messaging to learn some of the main characteristics of someone but it seems the tolerance for messaging on there is lower than other sites, so the odds of them disappearing is higher!
kassy Posted December 30, 2015 Posted December 30, 2015 I think you just need to message a few times, then either ask them out for a drink if they say yes then ask for their number. I usually have conversations that start with 1) how are you going?/enjoying the holidays?/how is your week going?/ had a great weekend? Etc. if the guys doesn't ask fairly quickly after that I'll confirm he 1) is single 2) lives here 3) ask him what he's looking for on tinder. I prefer getting to know someone over coffee not by text message. I dont want to chat for ages without meeting. In my world all you need to know is enough to think you want to meet for a coffee or something and then we can see if there is anything worth pursuing.
ses Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I've used almost every dating platform available but Tinder, interestingly enough. It is referred to as a hookup app; however my friend met her longtime boyfriend there and they both were looking for something serious. It is entirely possible—you just have to go in with an open mind and be honest with your intentions. Good luck!
GingerVixen Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I gave up OLD but I just had a profile in OkCupid. I cant stand Tinder. Way too superficial. It feels like you're flipping through a catalogue of people.
hhatesboys Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I gave up OLD but I just had a profile in OkCupid. I cant stand Tinder. Way too superficial. It feels like you're flipping through a catalogue of people. I kind of love you now, GingerVixen!!! I think it seems like you are "shopping" for people. Gross:laugh: OP, yes definitely get her number. I have never met anyone from any OLD site that I did not first give my number to. I guess it is a matter of opinion, but I like to message a little longer before meeting up. Sometimes if I feel the "meeting" suggestion comes up too soon, I will bail. Not because I don't want to meet, but just if I feel like it is too soon. But, yes get her number FOR SURE. I would never meet someone in person that I didn't even feel comfortable giving my number to. If she won't give you the number she is probably not that interested. 2
seekingluck Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I think you just need to message a few times, then either ask them out for a drink if they say yes then ask for their number. I usually have conversations that start with 1) how are you going?/enjoying the holidays?/how is your week going?/ had a great weekend? Etc. if the guys doesn't ask fairly quickly after that I'll confirm he 1) is single 2) lives here 3) ask him what he's looking for on tinder. I prefer getting to know someone over coffee not by text message. I dont want to chat for ages without meeting. In my world all you need to know is enough to think you want to meet for a coffee or something and then we can see if there is anything worth pursuing. Me too! I give out my number before meeting. Though I am quite open to meeting early on. Mostly because I am social and like meeting new people. for me it is no big deal / not stressful. I'd rather meet right away with no expectations. I find Tinder is mostly a miss. I want something genuine. Lots of men seem to lead with "do you give blow jobs."
grmi66 Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 I just might be the odd duck on Tinder, but found my best relationship on there. Actually read her little profile and it did say that she was looking for something serious. She told me that she was tired of the endless back and forth that you do on the other dating sites and likened Tinder to chatting up a guy at the bar. If something clicks, you offer up your phone number. A year later we are now living together and have plans to marry in the future. 3
SugarLips72 Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Tinder is fun and has a lot of people on it. Put a short bio. More men on there are looking for hookups than women but if you really are not looking for just a hookup say it. I met a few nice guys off of it but I am done with OLD haven't done it in over a year but have fun and don't take it too serious.
BelleSkye Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Op, just recently you were saying how happy you were in another relationship....what happened there? Are you still seeing her? Have you broken up? If so, what were the reasons? You sounded so happy in October...have you given yourself enough time to realise what happened there? Also, watch out for timder....there are many bots posing as attractive women. Also, from my personal experience, for every girl you swipe right for, she has ankther 15 or 20 swipes added as well.
Author Superman2024 Posted January 1, 2016 Author Posted January 1, 2016 I kind of love you now, GingerVixen!!! I think it seems like you are "shopping" for people. Gross:laugh: OP, yes definitely get her number. I have never met anyone from any OLD site that I did not first give my number to. I guess it is a matter of opinion, but I like to message a little longer before meeting up. Sometimes if I feel the "meeting" suggestion comes up too soon, I will bail. Not because I don't want to meet, but just if I feel like it is too soon. But, yes get her number FOR SURE. I would never meet someone in person that I didn't even feel comfortable giving my number to. If she won't give you the number she is probably not that interested. Just the other day I got my first number from a girl on Tinder and we're supposed to have a date on Sat though she didn't commit to a specific time yet. After she agreed to the date she asked how tall I was. I wasn't a big fan of the question but I told her and she said she was two inches taller (I'm 5'8"). She said she's dated guys shorter than her (5'9") before but not my height. I told her all the girls I've dated have been shorter than me but her height wasn't a big deal to me. I'm not so sure how she feels about it and wouldn't be surprised if she flaked out on the date because of it. I wouldn't think much of her if she did. An auto like program would be useless in my small area since I'm always running out of prospects! There's a girl I met from Christian Mingle recently who's never given me her number, even after the date! I've never had this happen but we're still communicating on the site. Op, just recently you were saying how happy you were in another relationship....what happened there? Are you still seeing her? Have you broken up? If so, what were the reasons? You sounded so happy in October...have you given yourself enough time to realise what happened there? Also, watch out for timder....there are many bots posing as attractive women. Also, from my personal experience, for every girl you swipe right for, she has ankther 15 or 20 swipes added as well. I was in a relationship for about 4 months that ended in Nov. She definitely wasn't the right one for me and it was for the best that we parted ways. Oh yeah, I'm totally aware of all the fake profiles on Tinder and can usually spot them immediately. It's really out of hand on there.
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