Poutrew Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 Quietstorm: wait until they have good sex robots! Why wait? Maybe someone on this board will invent the Fembot of your dreams...Lets see, with the development of the Fembot, the Orgasmatron and VR porn, the human race may just about go extinct. We can all be Old Maids together. Where can I sign up to be a beta tester?
sambolini Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 A couple weeks ago in another thread I talked about how changing gender demographics are changing the landscape for men and how it is affecting all these 25 year old virgin guys that are always whining on here. I wanted to address that issue a little more specifically and talk a little more on how that is going to get worse going into the future. In a nutshell, more [boy] babies are born than girl babies. I'm not going to mention any numbers but all of this is public library information in general. In the past boy babies and young children had higher death rates in boys than girls. Then due to things like child farm and industrial labor, young males succumbed to farming and accidental deaths at a much higher rate than girls. By the teen years, things like violence, accidents, risk taking behaviors and suicide killed off many more males than females. Then by upper teen and young adulthood, there were the great wars of generations past. I am a veteran myself so I won't diminish pain and suffering of our service members and their families, but if today if a roadside bomb kills 5 servicemembers it's headline news. where as in the days of Camden (revolutionary war battle) Gettysburg, Shiloh, Bellow Wood, D-day, Battle of the Bulge, Iwo jima, Inchon, La Drang Valley etc could kill a thousand or more young men in a day. So in our grandparents and beyond era, by the time a young adult male returned home alive, he was a survivor that was outnumbered by the number of women available. then add to that that alcoholism was a million times more prevalent and more severe which left many men basically useless blobs on the street and the fact that in the days before OSHA and occupational safety and labor laws countless men were killed and disabled on the job. When you add all of that up, in our grandparents generation and for countless generations before that, a man that made it to adulthood that was sober and had a source of income was a fine catch and basically had his pick of the "ladies in waiting." The only men that were overlooked were chronic, falling down alcoholics, in prison or were chronically unemployed and living on the street. During those times there were also what were known as "old maids." Old maids were basically left over women that didn't get a chair and were left standing when the music stopped. They were the left over women that didn't marry in Judeo-Christian cultures that subscribed to monogamous matings and marriage. In other cultures they would have been absorbed into basically harems or plural marriages along with other wives to one man. But in monogamous Judeo-Christian societies, they were left overs. This is all going to be turned upside down going into the future however. In the very near future, if not already, adult men are going to significantly outnumber women. We are already having 25, 30, and 40 year old virgins whining about not being able to find a mate. That trend is going to get worse. It will soon become common for every community to have a number of old maid men that are unable to pair-bond and will be left over. The old maid women of yesteryear really didn't cause many problems. many stayed at home with their parents, some moved in with their married sisters and their families and some moved out west to become mail order brides and the ones left over after that became prostitutes in the oil towns and gold towns in the developing west. The wives of yesteryear probably didn't like all the old maids around because they were afraid they'd try to get their hooks into their husbands but other than that they didn't cause many real problems. Single males on the other DO cause societal problems in a community. Single males drink and carouse and fight and will support redlight districts of strippers and whorehouses etc and will always be trying to score off someone else's chick. In generations past, mothers and parents would bring up their daughters on how to primp and preen themselves and how to dress attractively and how to act and behave in a manner that would make her competitive for the available males. Boys on the other hand were pretty much brought up that as long as they were a good person (aka "nice") and as long as they were employed and somewhat sober, they would be able to get a nice and attractive wife and for most men of that caliber, it turned out to be true. That will not be true going into the future however. It will not be enough for a man to be nice, sober and employed to get a wife of any desirability. The future man is going to have to develop a lot more desirable traits that simply being decent, employed and sober. He is going to have to be fit, well groomed and styled, well dressed, well educated, very well employed, have good social graces and interpersonal skills, will have to be competitive and dominant and will have to be able to both work collaboratively with other men as well as be able to fight off other men and keep other men out of his mate's pants. Men of the future are going to have to put as much time, energy and effort into being attractive to opposite sex as what our great grandmothers did to get men's attention. The men of the future will be attending college to get their M.R. degree as women once did to get their M.R.S. degree. And there will still be men left over. "bachelor" and more specifically "eligible bachelor" was a term used in days of yore to designate a man that was technically unmarried but was still marriage material and a viable candidate for marriage. In the future there will be another term unmarried men that are simply left over as were the old maids of yesteryear. In days of yore terms like 'bums' and 'losers' were used to describe adult men that couldn't get a mate, but in days of yore only the most drunk or the most unemployable weren't able to get a mate. In the future even some kind, considerate, clean, sober, law abiding, educated and gainfully employed men will be unable to secure a mate. A new vocabulary word will need to be developed soon for the old maid males of the future. I feel compelled to reply to this, especially the part bolded, which I will address first. As a single guy who plans on being a bachelor for life, I can 100% tell you that I have never done any of those things. I've never searched for a redlight district, I don't drink to excess (I hardly ever drink at all), and I certainly don't engage in physical violence against others. Other than getting married, I honestly can't think of anything that would be worse to do than what you just described. I have also never attempted to "score on someone else's chick". In fact, I'm a BH, so I know what it's like. And in my experience, as a successful, single, eligible guy, the largest demographic of women by far to hit on me is, you guessed it: married women. To assume that your label can apply to every single man in existence is nothing short of ludicrous. In fact, most single men simply want to live quiet lives and be left alone. We don't do anything to anyone. I find it interesting that you feel compelled to shame single men, as if by not having a woman in their lives they'll simply revert to a prehistoric mindset and become primitive savages completely devoid of any rational thought. Could there possibly be some projection involved? But let's get back to your original premise: that there simply won't be enough females to go around. I have to disagree with that assertion based on available evidence at hand. In the U.S., women currently outnumber men. GeoHive - Male / Female distribution With that being said, for every 100 female births, there are 105 male births. The odds that you will give birth to a boy or girl depend on where in the world you live | Pew Research Center I'm curious how the female population can outnumber men, when it appears that more boys are born than girls. The only thing I can think of is that men die in greater numbers than women do, despite the fact that more boys are born than girls; not only that, the death rate among men is significant enough to cause the female population to be higher than men, in spite of the fact that men gain an additional five births on top of the baseline 100 for every 100 female births. Women certainly have a greater life expectancy than men: Life expectancy in the USA hits a record high Male death rates are indeed higher than female death rates (to be fair, this data suggests that the gap in death rates between the sexes does appear to be narrowing. However, the gap is still significant enough to explain why the female population is higher despite a slightly higher male birth rate): Products - Data Briefs - Number 88 - March 2012 Not only that, men account for more than 3 out of 4 suicides. https://www.afsp.org/understanding-suicide/facts-and-figures I don't see this trend reversing anytime soon, because society at large doesn't seem to care. Not only that, a greater number of men are simply choosing to opt out of marriage (and sometimes relationships all together). In fact, the gender gap in the "never been married" category between the sexes is only getting larger, with men clearly pulling farther ahead: Not Married? The Odds That You Never Will Be Are Higher Than Ever - CityLab I predict the exact opposite will happen. Men will continue to die off in greater numbers than women, and a good portion of those who survive will eschew marriage anyway, thus contracting the market of eligible men. In other words, there will be an eligible man shortage. Only time will tell what really happens. But the data is there for anyone to see.
Taramere Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 (edited) I know various men who are single and don't have children - and really, they're much like women in the same position. Some are a bit of a neurotic mess, others chug along very happily. All, like women in the same boat, probably find themselves judged by other people at times. That is probably always going to happen. In part it's society's way of pressuring people to follow the traditional road of getting married and starting a family. To persuade people that it's selfish not to follow that road. But if it is a form of selfishness, it's not one that society need view as threatening. There's not a shortage of people of either gender in the world. Childless adults are not depriving the world of a much needed resource. For some the decision not to have children may be a selfish one - but nonetheless one which has some positive consequences. If childless adults like children, then they'll make great aunts and uncles, godmothers and godfathers etc. For any child, having a number of significant adults in their life who care about them and play some role in their early lives is a positive thing. I've had some tricky times with my SIL, but she and my brother are raising two fantastic kids. I'm endlessly impressed by how confident, successful (at school and in play) polite and socially at ease they are - and I think that has a lot to do with the fact that they've been raised in a situation where, whenever their parents needed a break or some time to themselves, there was always another adult relative who was more than happy to take over and spend time with them. As a single person, male or female, you don't need to be in some way excluded from normal society. It's down to the individual. If a spinster, old maid, bare branch or whatever you want to call those of us who are single and childless pays too much heed to such insulting terminology then it's going to eat away at them, they're going to be unhappy people - not great to be around, and not good role models for children who may or may not grow up to be single and childless themselves. Any person who struggles to find a partner they feel compatible with would probably be liable to raise children who experienced similar social/romantic struggles. Raising children fit for life's various struggles is a responsibility that, given the ever changing and challenging situations today's children face, a person ought to feel very certain they're up to fulfilling competently. Edited December 31, 2015 by Taramere 1
thefooloftheyear Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 (edited) My thoughts... I think since porn is so readily available, teenagers/young guys who aren't naturally good with women get their needs met with porn. When my husband and I were in high school in early 90s, porn was not a part of daily life. Kids might steal a porn tape from their dad or older brother, but other than that, we just had Skinemax. Teenage guys had all this testosterone and it prompted them to pursue girls. Their sex drive pushed them to learn to flirt, make girls laugh, go in for the kiss, etc. These days, I think many young guys use porn so much that it dulls their natural drive to pursue women. They are content enough with the satisfaction and variety that porn provides them, so they don't feel that desire & hunger that prompts guys to make moves and take risks with women. If they are jerking off to porn all through high school, they are missing out on so much practice with women and tolerance for rejection that will benefit them later in life. The guys that are naturally good with women will always attract lots of girls, as they always have. They couple up or become lifelong bachelors enjoying a variety of women. But the guys who aren't naturals often end up awkward, lost and depressed because they never pushed themselves out of their comfort zone. They are sensitive to rejection because they didn't get that toughness that comes from being rejected, brushing themselves off and trying again. Young guys who aren't naturally good with women, seem to just avoid the hassle of trying and getting rejected because they can substitute with porn. They waste the years where they are eager, bright eyed and bushytailed. Then years go by and when they are ready to settle down, they have no experience or confidence with women. Their energy and drive fades, and they end up old maids. I'm definitely not anti porn- I think it can be fun and harmless for many people. I just think guys shouldn't rely on porn to the point that they aren't driven to pursue real women. I think they should tell the boys in sex ed how porn could affect them if they rely on it as a substitute. . Eh, I dunno.... Guys used porn forever...May be more accessible now, but I wouldn't "blame" porn....I mean, even if you want to throw in strippers and prostitutes, they are all an easy target for women to blame when speaking of guys that have had little or no success with women... Perhaps its just that maybe the way the dynamics are its just less appealing for a guy...Because I employ mostly younger guys, I see a lot of what goes on in their personal lives...I just don't see them as satisfied in relationships as maybe guys my age were at that time..This kinda ties into what some were saying in the other thread with regard to feminism...Feminism with respect to opportunities and such is great....I get along quite well with most women that are strongly feminists..However you can't then expect guys to embrace it and accept it in the context of a relationship...That would be the same as a guy acting effeminate and complaining that women find that unappealing...That would be that guys option and he would need to accept that many women wouldn't like it.. Perhaps the way things are now,(where male/female roles are less defined and more ambiguous) just doesn't look like what a typical guy wants..Maybe they see porn as a way to view women in a more feminized and more sexualized role than whats available to them? This thought probably chafes most women and I can understand why it would...They don't want to be objectified by their tits and ass..Completely valid...But maybe the cultural shift has "confused" the typical guy... Maybe both sides are having trouble adapting to the "new" rules regarding gender roles...Like somehow the widely accepted traditional roles as provider/dominant male with nurturer/nester female are fighting an internal struggle with the new way of life, where these roles are being blurred... As a guy that considers himself rather complicated, I think some women forget how truly simple the average guy is...Provided with the few basic needs and he can be happy forever,,, TFY Edited December 31, 2015 by thefooloftheyear
Author oldshirt Posted December 31, 2015 Author Posted December 31, 2015 I feel compelled to reply to this, especially the part bolded, which I will address first. As a single guy who plans on being a bachelor for life, I can 100% tell you that I have never done any of those things. I've never searched for a redlight district, I don't drink to excess (I hardly ever drink at all), and I certainly don't engage in physical violence against others. Other than getting married, I honestly can't think of anything that would be worse to do than what you just described. I have also never attempted to "score on someone else's chick". In fact, I'm a BH, so I know what it's like. And in my experience, as a successful, single, eligible guy, the largest demographic of women by far to hit on me is, you guessed it: married women. Go take a look at the community right outside a military base if you want to see what it's like having a bunch of unattached young males with more testosterone than sense is like. You will see strip joints, bars, liquor stores, tattoo parlors and whorehouses lined up down the street. The local jail will be full of drunk dudes with black eyes and fat lips waiting for the MP's to get them to take them back to the base stockade. Does this mean that 'all' single males are indulging in this type of behavior every day? of course not, but at a general trend large numbers of single men will result in more problems that single women.
Author oldshirt Posted December 31, 2015 Author Posted December 31, 2015 But let's get back to your original premise: that there simply won't be enough females to go around. I have to disagree with that assertion based on available evidence at hand. In the U.S., women currently outnumber men. GeoHive - Male / Female distribution With that being said, for every 100 female births, there are 105 male births. The odds that you will give birth to a boy or girl depend on where in the world you live | Pew Research Center . Yes the 'total' number of women in the US (and presumably other countries) outnumber men. But when you look at the break down in age, women don't start to outnumber men until over the age of 35. That means that during the reproductive years and the years that people are typically seeking their first mate, men outnumber women and I assume that number is going to continue to rise and the age range where men outnumber women will continue to rise as death rates from warfare, occupational accidents, infant/child death rates from disease etc continue to decline.
Author oldshirt Posted December 31, 2015 Author Posted December 31, 2015 A number of posters have mentioned men choosing to remain unmarried and are kind of assuming that that trend will continue and that single-by-choice men will offset some of the imbalance between men and women. That may not be the case. In times and in areas where men have outnumbered women, marriage rates increase and men seek marriage at higher rates than when women outnumber men. When women are few, men tend to try to lock down the ones that are available. It's when women are plentiful that men often choose to remain unmarried. It makes sense when you think about it. If women are plentiful and you can hook up with a variety of women at your leisure, then why lock yourself into marriage and deal with all the other complications and issues of marriage if your needs are being met without it. But if women are few and the competition is stiff (no pun intended, but very applicable) then you aren't assured of getting your needs met at your leisure and people are going to be more likely to get theirs as soon as they can and try to lock them down. What may well end up occurring is that there will be women who will be delaying marriage and taking their own sweet time because they will have the luxury of having an abundant pool of candidates to choose from for an extended period of time so why rush. At the end of the great wars, women didn't have that luxury and were trying to marry up what they could when the guys were coming back from war. In the future it will be women that will have the luxury of waiting for all the stars to line up and instead of waiting for Mr Right, will be waiting for Mr Perfect. You can already see that trend occurring now.
carhill Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 IMO, great analysis and something I experienced personally in my demographic, to the extent men were, and still are, snapping up women as soon as there's a hint of a relationship or marital problem. The ones who aren't coupled and want a relationship necessarily expand their boundaries to include all potentially receptive females regardless of any official relationship status. That was a really harsh lesson learned in my 20's. Top game and aggressive wins. Unless men's brains are altered to a less sexual state of mind where desiring a sexual partner and mate becomes less of a priority, I can see that dynamic becoming more universal as men, now rendered safe and longer-lived by increasing personal and occupational safety and less risk-taking in general, die less at young ages and live longer lives. Those who aren't at top notch will become the old men, the forgotten. If they adopt the mindset that life is about living and not about success with women, then, regardless of society's label on them, they can feel healthy and productive about themselves in old age, just like the 'old maid' women before them. It comes down to the individual.
Author oldshirt Posted December 31, 2015 Author Posted December 31, 2015 IMO, great analysis and something I experienced personally in my demographic, to the extent men were, and still are, snapping up women as soon as there's a hint of a relationship or marital problem. The ones who aren't coupled and want a relationship necessarily expand their boundaries to include all potentially receptive females regardless of any official relationship status. That was a really harsh lesson learned in my 20's. Top game and aggressive wins. . I'm afraid it went over my head and I'm not quite following you. Can you dumb that down a little bit and explain it a little more. I think you may have some good information there, I'm just having a little trouble assimilating it.
carhill Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 Ha, Ha, you know exactly what I'm talking about. No bueno.
sambolini Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 A number of posters have mentioned men choosing to remain unmarried and are kind of assuming that that trend will continue and that single-by-choice men will offset some of the imbalance between men and women. That may not be the case. In times and in areas where men have outnumbered women, marriage rates increase and men seek marriage at higher rates than when women outnumber men. When women are few, men tend to try to lock down the ones that are available. It's when women are plentiful that men often choose to remain unmarried. It makes sense when you think about it. If women are plentiful and you can hook up with a variety of women at your leisure, then why lock yourself into marriage and deal with all the other complications and issues of marriage if your needs are being met without it. But if women are few and the competition is stiff (no pun intended, but very applicable) then you aren't assured of getting your needs met at your leisure and people are going to be more likely to get theirs as soon as they can and try to lock them down. What may well end up occurring is that there will be women who will be delaying marriage and taking their own sweet time because they will have the luxury of having an abundant pool of candidates to choose from for an extended period of time so why rush. At the end of the great wars, women didn't have that luxury and were trying to marry up what they could when the guys were coming back from war. In the future it will be women that will have the luxury of waiting for all the stars to line up and instead of waiting for Mr Right, will be waiting for Mr Perfect. You can already see that trend occurring now. Sources? 10char
sambolini Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 Go take a look at the community right outside a military base if you want to see what it's like having a bunch of unattached young males with more testosterone than sense is like. You will see strip joints, bars, liquor stores, tattoo parlors and whorehouses lined up down the street. The local jail will be full of drunk dudes with black eyes and fat lips waiting for the MP's to get them to take them back to the base stockade. Does this mean that 'all' single males are indulging in this type of behavior every day? of course not, but at a general trend large numbers of single men will result in more problems that single women. So you're basing an entire demographic of people on a small subset. I know how you feel, though. My ex wife cheated, and married women hit on me in abundance. Married women clearly have no concept of fidelity and commitment. (See what I did there?)
Rejected Rosebud Posted December 31, 2015 Posted December 31, 2015 It's really all about choice. Men and women both are under much less societal pressure to get married and have kids. Hopefully the stigma is lessening as well and those who remain single are NOT thought of as "leftovers" anymore. Though historically a "confirmed bachelor" was a man who CHOSE to remain single, while an "old maid" was an unwanted woman. I do think it's kind of amusing that guys who are not likely to find a successful long term relationship in their lives (whether by choice or by fate) have a movement now!!! The traditional "old maids" were just considered rejects!! 2
RedRobin Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) It's not until they reach their mid 20s and beyond that they are going to realize they are being left behind and then they'll come here whining. Well, if they listen to their fathers and grandfathers, yep, probably. The advice that all they need to do is earn a living and women will be flocking to them. What older generations call 'masculine' I consider entitled jerks who expect a maid and nanny in return for a paycheck. I much prefer TODAY over any other period in time. Where each person is obliged to be self sufficient, and they decide as a couple what their life will look like. Men who can't adapt? Yep, will be left behind. In my new home, men outnumber women and it is obvious. I get lots more attention here than I did in NY where women outnumber men. That doesn't change the fact that a lot of those same men feel entitled to their version of top tier based on what they see in movies and hear from other men... But if they don't wanna be alone, they will have to settle. Just like some women did in the past. Not me. I just moved. Edited January 3, 2016 by RedRobin
PPan Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) I don't know. I have met a lot of older guys because of my line of work when I was younger and most of the guys I've met were pretty happy being on their own. When guys have their hobbies and friends they seem to not feel lonely. Friendship can last forever, they honestly do. I have a buddy I have known since we were both 10 years old, and 10 years after our friendship has already lasted more than many marriages. And how can people even feel loney when they have themselves? The most lonely men were the guys whose wives divorced them and got them stuck with alimony/paying for a house they don't even own, and paying child-support for kds they aren't even allowed to see for whatever reason, or out of spite. The younger men I talk to and spend time with.. now those guys I find to be the most interesting. its natural for older guys to be jaded and to give up on relationships, as they have been through a lot of crappy situations. But young men in their prime? I went back to college and most guys are younger than me. And yet I never see guys approaching girls. I never see guys talking to girls. I see the occasional really great-looking guy that gets all the casual sex but I have never seen any of the guys I talk to, ever talk about girls. They aren't gay. i notice they check out girls when they think the girls are not watching but they are incapable of talking to them. Their standards are not even high. Sometimes they point a girl to me and say she is the most attractive girl they have ever seen, and when I look at the girls they're talking about I see someone chubby, and really average-looking. I think we are evolving into something different from my father's generation. My father was an airforce pilot who was stationed in several European bases when he was young. Obviously this was done before he met my mother, so he spent his free time pumping iron and chasing after girls. But this facebook generation would rather play video games and watch porn. Maybe they've realized they need to be good-looking to attract women, even if the women are just average. Knowing this they gave up and found something to entertain themselves with. I don't know. I only see a handful of guys chasing girls for the sake of having sex. I just see a lot of heterosexual guys having a lot of female friends and being content with being celibate. Well, if they are happy who am I to contest their lifestyle? Edited January 3, 2016 by PPan 1
thefooloftheyear Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 But this facebook generation would rather play video games and watch porn. Maybe they've realized they need to be good-looking to attract women, even if the women are just average. Knowing this they gave up and found something to entertain themselves with. I don't know. I only see a handful of guys chasing girls for the sake of having sex. I just see a lot of heterosexual guys having a lot of female friends and being content with being celibate. Well, if they are happy who am I to contest their lifestyle? I'm seeing the same thing.....And its infuriating the hell out of younger women that want the house. kids, picket fence and dog... TFY 2
PPan Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) I'm seeing the same thing.....And its infuriating the hell out of younger women that want the house. kids, picket fence and dog... TFY haha, yeah, I'm 25 years old and most of the girls I went to high school with are rushing to get married and have children. Some even get pregnant while on the pill.. oopsie others are trying to find a guy they can get a future with. Someone hardworking, dedicated, loyal.. but then they are not attracted to them because attractive men would rather have fun, and many others would rather spend their money on video games and on getting drunk, which frankly sounds a lot better than marriage + children + paying for a house + tons of bills. Maybe these younger guys have seen their fathers work jobs they hate(like I saw my grandfather and father do) and not have much of a life and they don't want that. But they should seriously get laid once or twice before entering a lifetime of celibacy. I guess they are too lazy to hit the gym. Edited January 3, 2016 by PPan
thefooloftheyear Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) haha, yeah, I'm 25 years old and most of the girls I went to high school with are rushing to get married and have children. Some even get pregnant while on the pill.. oopsie others are trying to find a guy they can get a future with. Someone hardworking, dedicated, loyal.. but then they are not attracted to them because attractive men would rather have fun, and many others would rather spend their money on video games and on getting drunk, which frankly sounds a lot better than marriage + children + paying for a house + tons of bills. Maybe these younger guys have seen their fathers work jobs they hate(like I saw my grandfather and father do) and not have much of a life and they don't want that. But they should seriously get laid once or twice before entering a lifetime of celibacy. I guess they are too lazy to hit the gym. Right...... Things are very weird now... The younger women get frustrated waiting for these guys to grow up and accept responsibility...These younger guys probably don't want to for the reasons you mentioned and also because they no longer have the need to be the breadwinner...That takes a lot of the pressure off... So then these younger women, in their frustration and baby clock ticking, go and look for an older guy(maybe 35-45) to get what they want...the older guy may be more stable in career, finances, more settled, etc.. And this creates another problem.... The older guys are thrilled to accept the attention from younger women,,,,Now the older women, some seeing their looks starting to fade, are frustrated to hell that these desirable "older" guys are getting out of their pool of available men... So that leaves a lot of desirable older women holding the bag...or settling for the "age appropriate" loser... Its crazy.... TFY Edited January 3, 2016 by thefooloftheyear 1
PPan Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) Right...... Things are very weird now... The younger women get frustrated waiting for these guys to grow up and accept responsibility...These younger guys probably don't want to for the reasons you mentioned and also because they no longer have the need to be the breadwinner...That takes a lot of the pressure off... So then these younger women, in their frustration and baby clock ticking, go and look for an older guy(maybe 35-45) to get what they want...the older guy may be more stable in career, finances, more settled, etc.. And this creates another problem.... The older guys are thrilled to accept the attention from younger women,,,,Now the older women, seeing their looks starting to fade, are frustrated to hell that these desirable "older" guys are getting out of their pool of available men... So that leaves a lot of desirable older women holding the bag...or settling for the "age appropriate" loser... Its crazy.... TFY seen that happen often. I have one friend who got pregnant by a guy she really wasn't into, but he had a job and his own house. She has no problems saying the kid is probably not his. What really amazes me is that she's not trailer park trash but still behaves like this. Another girl got pregnant when she was 18 and now is looking for someone who'll want to be in a relationship with her nonetheless. Things must be bad, if a pretty, petite blonde can't get a guy to stay for longer than a few months. I have another friend who dated the same guy from age 18 to age 25 and he dumped her because he wanted to find meaning to his life(nightclubs + hooking up + girls + strippers etc) and she got herself involved with a doctor in his late 30s. She comes back to me with '' he just wants to have fun, he's not interested in anything serious.'' She was trying to get that guy because he was a doctor and she wanted to leave her parents house and get married. But the guy's a doctor. he can get plenty of women if he wants to, why settle down, even if the girl is cute and skinny and 10 years younger when there's a ton of other girls who look like her trying to do the same. He's just having fun So, we have something hilarious going on. Plenty of young guys who lack the guts to approach girls, or have their sex drive sated by the consumption of porn and just aren't interested in going through all of what many guys have to go through to get sex. Then we have the good-looking guys who can have pretty much any woman they want, and decide to dedicate their lives to the pursuit of pleasure, never settling down and most likely creating more and more single mothers by the year. After this, we have the older women who have either spent their teens and 20s having casual sex, having non-serious relationships, or working hard to build a life for themselves and are now ready to settle down and find an equally-minded guy, only to look around and see that the guys they want are not interested in settling down, or that these guys find porn + beer + hanging out with their friends a scenario far better than marriage + obligations and responsabilities. I mean, I love my father and all, but I could never have the lifestyle that he had. He had a lot of fun in his youth but then settled down and did the whole 9 to 5 life until he retired. I'm not interested in that. I'm not interested in being with the same woman for a long time. I'm not interested in relationships. I'm lucky in that I got my father's good-looks and my mother's charm, and the IDGAF attitude, and I can keep this lifestyle going for a long time, and when I can't anymore I'll probably move to Germany or something and hire really attractive escorts. But I sure as heck ain't having kids, marrying, or even get into a relationship. I enjoy being free too much. And no woman, regardless of how attractive she might be has ever made me question my lifestyle. Edited January 3, 2016 by PPan
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