Should I use Go Fund Me website for foreign dating

[logan415]

I browse through the Go Fund Me website and I see people asking for donations so they can have their wedding. Obvious a wedding cost money. For me its bit different because I met someone online and she lives in Eastern Europe.

 

We seem to connect well and it’s the first woman I believe that had such a solid interest in me and I’m interested in her. But only problem is the cost of travel and staying there for a month so I can see if we can connect. At my age I’m 29 years old about to be 30 years old next year and never been in a relationship, never dated and never had any form of intimacy, I feel I may actually found a person to share those experiences with.

 

In the one month there I can see if she is worthwhile bringing to the USA. We also share some things in common which is a bit surprised given the differences in our background. I would like to get married and have my own family one day but stopped thinking because of my horrible dating life until I met this woman online. I never thought it would turn out to be this way but I guess this is what is meant to happen. I think everyone should have least one opportunity to experience love and this is my chance just need some help covering the finances.

 

I just want to get some opinions and thoughts from some people on this idea.

Edited December 30, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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[TunaCat]

No way!

 

Listen, I've seen a lot of people use GoFundMe for stupid things, things that don't really matter in the long run, and unfortunately I think your example is one of those things.

 

No one is going to want to fund your trip to meet this girl for the first time. You need to come up with your own money to afford it, and if you can't, just accept that it's not gonna happen.

 

FYI, I think GoFundMe accounts for weddings are VERY tacky.

[logan415]

No way!

 

Listen, I've seen a lot of people use GoFundMe for stupid things, things that don't really matter in the long run, and unfortunately I think your example is one of those things.

 

No one is going to want to fund your trip to meet this girl for the first time. You need to come up with your own money to afford it, and if you can't, just accept that it's not gonna happen.

 

FYI, I think GoFundMe accounts for weddings are VERY tacky.

 

So that means I will stay lonely all my life?

[hasaquestion]

So that means I will stay lonely all my life?

 

You're not that old you know. Many people get married after 29.

 

What's your story? Like what do you do. I don't mean job necessarily. Like give us a sparknotes on what logan415 is all about.

[dreamingoftigers]

So that means I will stay lonely all my life?

 

Seriously?

 

There's only one person on the WHOLE PLANET you can hook up with your ENTIRE LIFE?

[d0nnivain]

P.T. Barnum often said, "A fool and his (her) money are soon parted." If you can get somebody to give you money so you can go chase your dream, good for you.

 

 

Do I think it will work? No. Would I give you money for something like this? Not even if you were my own family.

 

 

Plan a shorter trip you can afford. At 29 if you can't afford to take yourself to Europe, perhaps consider dating women closer to home. How do you even know this person on the other side of the planet is real or wants you for more than a Green Card? Heck in this environment how do you even know they aren't a terrorist?

 

 

If money is such a concern for you, can the other person come here? If not, why not?

 

 

If you can't afford a plane ticket, how will you afford married life?

 

 

All in all, it's just not a solid plan.

[logan415]

You're not that old you know. Many people get married after 29.

 

What's your story? Like what do you do. I don't mean job necessarily. Like give us a sparknotes on what logan415 is all about.

 

I like spending outdoors a lot exploring nature and go camping.

I enjoy tennis, bowling, and snowboarding.

I enjoy reading about science (mainly physical science so things in astronomy, weather and general Earth science interest me).

I play video games occasionally, I'm not a heavy gamer.

[d0nnivain]

So join a co-ed bowling team & attend meet-up groups that play tennis, go camping & study science.

 

 

All of those seem like more realistic options then taking a trip you can't afford.

[TheArtist]

I think you're putting an awful lot of hope on your first relationship being the one that sticks. You can't possibly know if you're going to marry someone within a month and what if you can't stand each other after day one? Will you just hang around the town until it's time to go home?

 

I'm sorry to say but at the moment you don't have a relationship, you have a penpal. I'm sure the US is full of lovely ladies waiting for a date with someone who has all those hobbies you listed. Use those as your starting point.

[losangelena]

I mean yes you could use a site like go fund me—as those types of site have revealed, people will crowdsource almost anything.

 

I'm more worried that you think this one woman in Eastern Europe is your only shot at love.

 

Also, I hate to even ask, but do you verifiable proof that this woman is a real woman who really wants a relationship? Have you heard this story? Clever Bots - Radiolab

[logan415]

I mean yes you could use a site like go fund me—as those types of site have revealed, people will crowdsource almost anything.

 

I'm more worried that you think this one woman in Eastern Europe is your only shot at love.

 

Also, I hate to even ask, but do you verifiable proof that this woman is a real woman who really wants a relationship? Have you heard this story? Clever Bots - Radiolab

 

I have webcam with her on Skype and that cannot be faked. Pictures yes they can because you can pull off their photos from someone profile. I also communicate with her a lot through Facebook. We also talk on Viber when we can because of the time difference. I have saved up about $ 3,500 for the trip but I I would say need about $ 1,500 more to make sure I'm covered. Most likely I would need to shorten my trip to 2 weeks instead of a month.

 

As far getting along we do well online and yes I know its the same in person but I'm sure it won't be much different just mainly the physical part I can actually touch her.

[logan415]

I think you're putting an awful lot of hope on your first relationship being the one that sticks. You can't possibly know if you're going to marry someone within a month and what if you can't stand each other after day one? Will you just hang around the town until it's time to go home?

 

I'm sorry to say but at the moment you don't have a relationship, you have a penpal. I'm sure the US is full of lovely ladies waiting for a date with someone who has all those hobbies you listed. Use those as your starting point.

 

When I try to meet ladies in the US it seems they always taken. I think few lied just to keep me away. I essentially have given up in the US because I heard of other men having struggles here and being successful overseas.

 

I have met women here and its like when I talk to them they don't seem engaging. When you talk its like they "reply yeah, yeah yeah, uh huh uh huh yeah". You know how that goes. Yeah, I solely believe I'm truly an outsider here when I just don't appeal to American women. So I'm giving up on US dating, and I figure maybe going overseas I will do much better.

[Erik30]

In the one month there I can see if she is worthwhile bringing to the USA. We also share some things in common which is a bit surprised given the differences in our background.

 

The whole thing seems like a bad idea. A lot of women from that area are only looking for an American (or any other guy from the West) to get out of their own country. You might be an easy target due to your inexperience

[losangelena]

The whole thing seems like a bad idea. A lot of women from that area are only looking for an American (or any other guy from the West) to get out of their own country. You might be an easy target due to your inexperience

 

That's kind of what I was thinking, too.

 

From your last thread, OP, it doesn't sound like you've given American women much of a chance.

 

I really don't want to rain on your parade, and I hope it's genuine, but I would be very careful if I were you. Where did you meet this woman?

[logan415]

That's kind of what I was thinking, too.

 

From your last thread, OP, it doesn't sound like you've given American women much of a chance.

 

I really don't want to rain on your parade, and I hope it's genuine, but I would be very careful if I were you. Where did you meet this woman?

 

I met her on world wide dating website. They have other Americans on there. She message me first about 7 months and she told me message me because she found me handsome. Yes I know about stories of mail order brides and green cards. The funny thing she told me about women in her country actually doing that. She told me she would like to meet and see how we do in person. She has a cousin in New York who married an American guy and been together for 4.5 years so I guess she feel she could have the same kind of luck.

[basil67]

When you talk its like they "reply yeah, yeah yeah, uh huh uh huh yeah". You know how that goes.

 

When people only respond with 'yeah, yeah, uh huh, it means you needs to stop talking about yourself and ask some questions. If you ask questions, then they need to use other words.

 

So many people these days seem to have lost the art of conversation.

They just blather about themselves without thinking to ask about the other person. It leaves the other party with nothing much to say other than 'yeah, yeah, uh huh'.

 

This is a pet dislike of mine.

 

<rant over>

[losangelena]

I met her on world wide dating website. They have other Americans on there. She message me first about 7 months and she told me message me because she found me handsome. Yes I know about stories of mail order brides and green cards. The funny thing she told me about women in her country actually doing that. She told me she would like to meet and see how we do in person. She has a cousin in New York who married an American guy and been together for 4.5 years so I guess she feel she could have the same kind of luck.

 

Well hopefully she's genuine, and that she's not part of some scam and that when you show up there's some large Ukrainian man waiting to rip you off.

 

I realize I'm maybe sounding a bit extreme here, but I feel like that happens sometimes.

 

Anyway, back to your OP—if you don't mind people knowing that you're traveling to Europe to go meet some woman, then sure, see if crowd-funding will work. The worst that will happen is that you'll have to raise the money yourself.

[Space Ritual]

I have webcam with her on Skype and that cannot be faked. Pictures yes they can because you can pull off their photos from someone profile. I also communicate with her a lot through Facebook. We also talk on Viber when we can because of the time difference. I have saved up about $ 3,500 for the trip but I I would say need about $ 1,500 more to make sure I'm covered. Most likely I would need to shorten my trip to 2 weeks instead of a month.

 

As far getting along we do well online and yes I know its the same in person but I'm sure it won't be much different just mainly the physical part I can actually touch her.

 

You would be better served using that money at the Strip Joint in your town. Or better yet you can give it to me and I'll use it at the strip joint. lol

 

Please stop all thoughts of such a fool hardy adventure. A guy like you will end up kidnapped at the airport and being forced into male prostitution in Kiev and no one will hear from you ever again until you are photographed hanging in a closet like David Carradine.

 

Come on man, are you serious? lol

 

 

 

I'm getting my popcorn, I bet somebody is going to think this is totally legit.

[kendahke]

I browse through the Go Fund Me website and I see people asking for donations so they can have their wedding. Obvious a wedding cost money. For me its bit different because I met someone online and she lives in Eastern Europe. We seem to connect well and it’s the first woman I believe that had such a solid interest in me and I’m interested in her. But only problem is the cost of travel and staying there for a month so I can see if we can connect. At my age I’m 29 years old about to be 30 years old next year and never been in a relationship, never dated and never had any form of intimacy, I feel I may actually found a person to share those experiences with. In the one month there I can see if she is worthwhile bringing to the USA. We also share some things in common which is a bit surprised given the differences in our background. I would like to get married and have my own family one day but stopped thinking because of my horrible dating life until I met this woman online. I never thought it would turn out to be this way but I guess this is what is meant to happen. I think everyone should have least one opportunity to experience love and this is my chance just need some help covering the finances.

 

I just want to get some opinions and thoughts from some people on this idea.

 

How do you know she's a real person and not a romance scammer/catfish?

 

I think that using GoFundMe for this is tacky and you will most likely get a whole of abuse from the people on there. Your best bet is to get a second job and use that income to fund this trip and aim for going in late summer.

 

And you won't be alone for the rest of your life--don't be dramatic.

[kendahke]

I have webcam with her on Skype and that cannot be faked. .

 

Actually it can.

[nicco]

Since you've been single all this time, it sounds like you will be okay with any girl who has a good personality and is pretty.

 

What you're trying to do is possible, but the rate of failure is to high. The reason I say that is because you're already having money issues just for the trip.

 

1)How do you plan to visit her again, if everything goes well?

2)How will you help financially sponsor her visa?

3)Does her standards matter at all?

(language she speaks, hobbies, future goals, etc.,.)

4)Is she saving any money?

 

 

I recommend saving the money and meet more women online before you decide.

Basically, it sounds like your walking into the dealership looking for a car and choosing the first one that looks good without inspecting it.

 

 

By the way $5,000 is pretty expensive. I flew from the east coast of the USA to Asia and stayed there for 2 months in a developed country for about $3,500.

 

 

Also here's the risk of leaving the country:

1) Rob/Kidnapped - You already told her you're saving the money, so if you travel there, she knows you have access to it. She could be working with others to rob you or kidnap you for a bounty.

 

 

But if you want to go ahead and see here, regardless of what we say here:

Then at least meet her sister and her sister's husband here. Why risk $5,000 when you can risk $300 or less?

[stillafool]

So that means I will stay lonely all my life?

 

Absolutely not! Get a second or third job and save up the money!

[logan415]

Actually it can.

 

Now you can't. How can you record a live video and respond to my questions. Impossible. I don't believe you. I think you went overboard. Pictures yes I can see but video no. I believe most people here would agree with me on that.

[carhill]

IMO, pass on the solicitation and get an in country apartment rented and go. You should be able to do most locales, save for the big cities, for 3500 for the month, including air. Shop and eat like a local and no extravagant dates.

 

My experiences were a couple of years of dating FSU/CIS ladies and spending about two months in total in-country. The two most consistently expensive single items were my interpreter and driver. However, they both were instrumental in avoiding scams and bad choices and my driver was wonderful with the police. I think my first month long trip ran about 3200 all-included, including long-distance trains. The costs of dating, meaning relevant to the women, were essentially nothing.

 

Good luck and, if your adventure requires a K1 or K3, figure 25-50K in personal expenses to get a solid wife whom you've vetted thoroughly. Also budget for her (and you) to return to visit family.

[logan415]

Since you've been single all this time, it sounds like you will be okay with any girl who has a good personality and is pretty.

 

What you're trying to do is possible, but the rate of failure is to high. The reason I say that is because you're already having money issues just for the trip.

 

1)How do you plan to visit her again, if everything goes well?

2)How will you help financially sponsor her visa?

3)Does her standards matter at all?

(language she speaks, hobbies, future goals, etc.,.)

4)Is she saving any money?

 

 

I recommend saving the money and meet more women online before you decide.

Basically, it sounds like your walking into the dealership looking for a car and choosing the first one that looks good without inspecting it.

 

 

By the way $5,000 is pretty expensive. I flew from the east coast of the USA to Asia and stayed there for 2 months in a developed country for about $3,500.

 

 

Also here's the risk of leaving the country:

1) Rob/Kidnapped - You already told her you're saving the money, so if you travel there, she knows you have access to it. She could be working with others to rob you or kidnap you for a bounty.

 

 

But if you want to go ahead and see here, regardless of what we say here:

Then at least meet her sister and her sister's husband here. Why risk $5,000 when you can risk $300 or less?

 

Actually I'm more at risk of being shot and killed in the US than her country (look at all the mass shootings and gun violence). You don't here all the gun violence over there like here. You got people in America fighting over a item during Black Friday. She does not live in Ukraine as someone mention Ukraine. Most of the former USSR countries are pretty okay. Of course there are some crazy ones but crazy people exist everywhere.

 

So if you meet a woman in America how much do you trust her? She could have her posse waiting to kidnap you here too. I don't see much of a difference of trust to meet someone here in the US compared to someone overseas.