laneyinlove Posted June 2, 2005 Posted June 2, 2005 Hey all, So I met this guy 3 weeks ago and it was a very intense fast connection. I had gotten out of a relationship about a month and a half ago so I wasn't quite sure how the dating thing goes and am afraid I messed this one up. He would call me the day before or the day of and we would hang out. I didn't play hard to get at all and would be readily availible. I would say that I we saw each other about 2 times a week . He takes me out to dinner and treats me really well and was excited about introducing me to his friends and such and he did and that went well. We did sleep together on the third date and since then most everytime we hang out it ends up in sex. I have to admit I was the one who pushed it sexually because I wanted sex so bad and he was so cute and I have not held back.I even seduced him at a party we were at. In any event this weekend I saw him on Friday and then on Saturday for a party with his friends where he left it to hang out with me and my girlfriends at a bar that is known for having lots of Gay men ( my girlfriends and I like to hang out at places like that) He had a good time but ended up offending my friend through miscommunication but other than that I think he had a good time. Anyways since that Saturday he has not called at all. I called him on Sunday to say Hi and he hasn't called me back and it is now Wednesday. I do remember the last time I was with him, I said something about being nervous to go over my exes house and pick up some things and I don't know why I said that but i was nervous and felt I could confide in him. I am wondering if he has lost interest since he has not called me back when i called him on Sunday night. The phone call was light and I said "talk soon". Anyways, I am thinking that if I don't hear from him on Friday I will write him an e-mail asking how he's doing and that I'm glad for the time we spent together and I can understand if he's changed his mind but I would just like to know. Any advice? Some friends say maybe he's trying to pace things since it went so fast. Others say some men pull away to figure out what they want. I know that he is moving to a new place soon and he is an actor and is busy but I am not sure how busy. He used to call me from set before and we would talk about 3 times a week. I am confused please help.
LucreziaBorgia Posted June 2, 2005 Posted June 2, 2005 Anyways, I am thinking that if I don't hear from him on Friday I will write him an e-mail asking how he's doing and that I'm glad for the time we spent together Let your email end there. As soon as you start in with: and I can understand if he's changed his mind but I would just like to know. this early on, its going to go downhill pretty quickly. He's going to feel obligation creep in, and will either placate you or avoid you. Just contact, say hello - that you are having a great time with him, and that you'll talk to him soon. Leave out 'hopefully' or 'looking forward to' or anything that would suggest that you are trying to lead his responses. Something like: Hey, ___ - just wanted to drop you an email to say hi and to let you know I've had a great time hanging out with you. If you want to hang out again sometime, give me a call. Take care, (your name). If you don't hear from him after that, then you'll know its time to move on.
yellowrose Posted June 2, 2005 Posted June 2, 2005 LucreziaBorgia - Sound advice. Anything more sounds a bit (and we are supposed to be blunt here, right? I mean, what's the point in responding if you're not going to be honest?) --- needy. An inert response is a really good way to a) Maintain your respectability. b) Not pressure. c) Not suffer the aftermath of feeling like you threw yourself into an unrequited emotional situation. d) Make it easy for him to call you if he does feel more certain about things later on. Good luck!
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