Buccaneer55 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Hello, I've been dating this woman for about 2-3 months now she's been separated from her husband for more than 2 years and he lives in the Pacific through the military. Me and her have a history (we know each other back to our high school days) and she was the one who pursued me for this relationship. When we first got involved I thought she was already divorced, knowing how long she had been separated and was really shocked after things started to progress to find out that she was indeed still married. She has been saying there is no way that she'd fix things with him seeing how he cheated on her multiple times and also physically, mentally, and emotionally abused her. She does have a 3 year old daughter with him though. Her divorce is scheduled to be final the 2nd week of Feb. She started to bring me around the child recently and even brought me to meet some of her co-workers about a month back, and lately she has been telling me that she loves me and that I'm the man she thought never existed. A few weeks back she got an e-mail from her husband letting her know that he'd be in town for two weeks and he'd be in on Christmas Eve. She doesn't want him to know about us because of the child and the current legal proceedings. So the other day we had our own Christmas with the kid as well and then they went off to meet him at the airport with more of his family. Since she's left I haven't heard a word from her and I'm starting to let my mind panic. Deep down I want to believe it's because he's never been around the kid, and we agreed we don't want him to know about the situation, but there's another part of me that wonders are they talking about working things out even after all that's happened and how much time has passed. I'm a divorcee myself and my divorce was finalized 7 months ago. After going through the pain of that, I'm just not wanting to get myself hurt again. Since she was the one who pursued this relationship are any of my fears warranted or am I making myself worry over nothing? I know I won't be the one to initiate any contact while I know that he's here, but I figured she'd still might send a text or two a day just to say hey. Is it unreasonable for me to think that in this situation? I'm just not wanting to be her rebound, but I hate not hearing anything from her either. Any input is greatly appreciated!
oberkeat Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Why don't you go find yourself a nice single girl who does not have these types of issues in her life? This woman is in the middle of a divorce, coming out of an abusive relationship, with a kid. Why would you want to date someone with that kind of baggage? That makes no sense to me. You need to step back and reevaluate your thought process and your priorities. This situation is not healthy for you. You should want nothing to do with this woman and her drama.
oregon0011 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 It has been my experience that often time the woman filing for divorce will paint her husband black while going through this. Often times lies. It's very common. And you are there for her emotional support.
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