Ixi10 Posted December 25, 2015 Posted December 25, 2015 Merry Christmas everyone!!! I'm writing to get some advice about my current situation. My ex and I were together for 3 years when he ended things a few months ago. Since the day we broke up, we have been doing the exact same things we've always done when we were still together. We still hang out, grab dinner, watch movies, go to family and friend functions. And yes we still have sex. This behavior confuses me so much. I don't understand why he's acting like we are together when we are not. The breakup was his choice, not mine. I've talked to him about this and according to him we are together but not in label. What does that even mean??? He dumped me because he's going through a life change right now and he told me that he's afraid I'm going to hurt him down the line. I think he still cares for me if he still spends so much time with him . Do you think I can convince him to give us another try or just walk away and end all contact with him?
Glass Hut Posted December 25, 2015 Posted December 25, 2015 Are you allowed to have sex with other guys right now?
FadedSign52 Posted December 25, 2015 Posted December 25, 2015 Based on what you've told us I think you should quit wasting your time and find someone who truly wants to be with you. If he does not see you as his girlfriend he's just keeping you around until he finds someone else. I don't care what life changing event is occurring, you'd think he would want you there for support not push you away. Quit wasting your time and move on, the right guy is out there for you. And Merry Christmas
hippychick3 Posted December 25, 2015 Posted December 25, 2015 Nice setup for him...all the perks of a relationship without being in a relationship. Seriously, he is using you to meet his needs and you're allowing it. He broke up with you and you're sacrificing your dignity by continuing to give him all the benefits without the commitment. Stop sleeping with him, stop talking to him, and move on to someone who wants to be with you and call you his girlfriend.
Author Ixi10 Posted December 25, 2015 Author Posted December 25, 2015 Thanks Deep down I know you guys are right but a huge part of me is hoping that I can do something or say something to change his mind. I spent so much of my adult life with him that I'm having a really hard time letting go. We both cried and had countless sleepless nights. I guess I'm just not ready to let things go. No chance of changing his mind huh? And yes we are both allowed to sleep and see other peoole. But I know he isn't and I've dated a little bit but haven't had sex with anyone else.
FadedSign52 Posted December 25, 2015 Posted December 25, 2015 What if you do convince him to get back together, is he just going to turn around and do the same thing to you in a years time? I've wasted time in relationships I deep down knew weren't going to last and looking back now I wish I had ended them much sooner and moved on. And dating does not get easier as you get older (for men or women).
Author Ixi10 Posted December 25, 2015 Author Posted December 25, 2015 Yes you're right. I guess i just need to force my heart and head to be on the same page :/ Thanks!
Amalyn Posted December 25, 2015 Posted December 25, 2015 If this is not the kind of relationship you want to have, you need to end it now. He has everything he wants. He has you anytime that he wants, without having to put a label on it or have commitment. You need to do what will make you happy. If you stay in this situation, you may look back later and wish you ended it now instead of dragging out the inevitable.
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