Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 (edited) Gr4 and qboro just gave me the worst advice ever and I ,foolishly, followed it. Now I feel like crap, with a stupid unanswered text and he's probably in a date with another woman. Guys, please read some dating rules before advising someone here. Men chase, women accept or reject the chase. It is what it is. Edited December 26, 2015 by brokengirl85
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Going to sleep. Three hours and no reply to my text, that I sent because gr4 called me entitled and that I have to chase men or I'll loose them, and qboro, who told me it was me the one acting weird, a flakey, and that I was the one acting strange. This happens because all kind of people give all kind of advice here, without thinking, without researching, and without reading. Stupid me that I come here for advice. I'm so mad
walkingonair Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Yea don't respond! He just wants to know that he has you! You're worth much more than that and you deserve respect!!!
guest569 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 This man is not for you. Delete and block and find someone who will be more up front and contact you regularly without stupid games (hot and cold). My entire dating life until recently involved all this second guessing of myself (should i text? Is that needy? Why won't he reply). Frankly they were not into me and not as invested as i was. Its not fun and not how it has to be. Cut your losses
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 This man is not for you. Delete and block and find someone who will be more up front and contact you regularly without stupid games (hot and cold). My entire dating life until recently involved all this second guessing of myself (should i text? Is that needy? Why won't he reply). Frankly they were not into me and not as invested as i was. Its not fun and not how it has to be. Cut your losses Ok I blocked him. Almost four hours and a half and the jerk didn't answer my text. He can write me a book now, I'd never know. I feel relieved I blocked him. It's like all this stupid game is finally over.
loveiswar101 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 I'm giving him the same treatment he's giving me. Sorry but this is not how people should work, go with flow be honest. If want to play cloak and daggers play cluedo! If you like him be honest, don't complicate things. Don't chase and don't wait for texts Busy time of year and if not happy with how all is going move on. Marry Xmas
GR4 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 So this is all my fault now is it? You blocked him because he hadn't replied within four hours? Did you not think he might be busy with family, busy in general at this time of year? Genuinely how old are you out of interest? You're acting like a little kid throwing their toys out of the pram. 2
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 So this is all my fault now is it? You blocked him because he hadn't replied within four hours? Did you not think he might be busy with family, busy in general at this time of year? Genuinely how old are you out of interest? You're acting like a little kid throwing their toys out of the pram. You shouldn't be giving advice to anyone.
GR4 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 You shouldn't be giving advice to anyone. I can give any advice I want to. Whether or not you act on that advice is totally down to you. I didn't make you text him, you decided to and then threw a hissy fit when he didn't reply within a few hours. If you like this guy and want to see him again unblock him and act like a grown up. If he realises he's been blocked then it's probably too late and you'll have no one to blame but yourself. 1
Jessie1231 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 You shouldn't be giving advice to anyone. Don't blame people on here for your own issues. The only one who seemed to be playing games was you by trying to get the guy to chase you. What decade do you live in? Women are allowed to show interest. If I'm interested in a guy, I answer his texts and initiate when I feel like it. If he likes it, great. If he doesn't, there are plenty of other guys out there. But you're blaming people who gave good advice on your problem. You are so insecure that you think it's the end of the world when someone doesn't respond to a text in four hours. So what? He was probably out living his life which is what you should be doing instead of waiting by the phone to hear from him and checking to see whether he is online. If you would get out and live your life, you would worry less about his every action and come off as much less desperate. 5
losangelena Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Lol, girl you are something else. I think if someone on here gives you advice that you don't want to take, you ignore it. You're not bound to follow every suggestion proffered. If you didn't want to text that guy or seem like you're chasing, you were under no obligation to text, who cares if a couple of forum members think you're entitled and flakey? If you can't handle the idea of someone disagreeing with you, then you probably shouldn't be posting here. And now you blocked him? What if he was with his family, or at work? 2
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Don't blame people on here for your own issues. The only one who seemed to be playing games was you by trying to get the guy to chase you. What decade do you live in? Women are allowed to show interest. If I'm interested in a guy, I answer his texts and initiate when I feel like it. If he likes it, great. If he doesn't, there are plenty of other guys out there. But you're blaming people who gave good advice on your problem. You are so insecure that you think it's the end of the world when someone doesn't respond to a text in four hours. So what? He was probably out living his life which is what you should be doing instead of waiting by the phone to hear from him and checking to see whether he is online. If you would get out and live your life, you would worry less about his every action and come off as much less desperate. I come off as desperate when I text a man that's clearly playing me and I'm giving him green light to continue stringing me along. I'm blaming people that, based in their own personal struggles, advice others to act without even thinking if this particular situation.
GR4 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 If I told you to jump off a cliff would you do it? Fu*k me...
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Lol, girl you are something else. I think if someone on here gives you advice that you don't want to take, you ignore it. You're not bound to follow every suggestion proffered. If you didn't want to text that guy or seem like you're chasing, you were under no obligation to text, who cares if a couple of forum members think you're entitled and flakey? If you can't handle the idea of someone disagreeing with you, then you probably shouldn't be posting here. And now you blocked him? What if he was with his family, or at work? I know, I'm just tired of people who tells me I'm the one playing or that if I don't chase the man I'll loose him just because I decided to act passively in this situation. Yes, I blocked him because I was wasting too much time in a guy who's not direct, not clear, and not polite enough. I'll probably unblock him though since I'm thinking more clearly this morning and at this point I don't care if he replies or not.
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 If I told you to jump off a cliff would you do it? Fu*k me... Go solve your own issues, please, you know nothing about dating and relationships.
Jessie1231 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Go solve your own issues, please, you know nothing about dating and relationships. I think you should take your own advice and go solve your own issues before you attempt to date. Being this invested in a guy you've gone out with a few times isn't close to normal or healthy. 1
losangelena Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 I know, I'm just tired of people who tells me I'm the one playing or that if I don't chase the man I'll loose him just because I decided to act passively in this situation. Yes, I blocked him because I was wasting too much time in a guy who's not direct, not clear, and not polite enough. I'll probably unblock him though since I'm thinking more clearly this morning and at this point I don't care if he replies or not. Again, you're not under any obligation to follow advice you don't want to follow. Who gives a rat's behind if some strangers on the Internet disagree with how you're living your life? I think it's rather unfair of you to lambast GR4 or Q because they gave you advice you didn't want to follow, yet followed it anyway. Do you see the silliness in that? Stop it with this guy. Either leave him blocked or unblocked. Jesus girl, you blow with the wind. Make a decision and stick with it. 2
katiegrl Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 (edited) BG...follow your gut! You are the one dating him, not any of us! If you think and feel he has been stringing you along, then go with that and stop dating him! And jmo and experience, but when a man is into you, and you alone (which is how it should be, at least for me) ...yes he would have set up that fourth date, and he would have been all over that last text you sent him. Even if he were with family, friends, he would have responded back for heaven's sake ...sooner than four hours. That is how men behave when into a chick! Not multi-dating, and skulking other chicks on the internet. Please guys, I wish so badly you could be a woman for like two seconds. Women aren't perfect either, but there are a lot of red flags with this guy that indicate she is a plan B.... and BG is only trying to protect her own heart, cause if she doesn't who will? BG, IMO walk away.....you deserve better. Block him again and go no contact. Screw what everyone thinks, you do what is right for you! Stay true to yourself, and you'll be okay. You know what you want, and how you want your dating experiences to go. Don't settle for less than that! Edited December 26, 2015 by katiegrl 2
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Katiegrl, I do too believe that when aman is into you, you don't need to chase them. I've came off as desperate in a previous relationship, chasing a guy and sending pictures (not nude!) of myself, thinking he'd fall in love with me if he just realized how beautiful I am or how eager to be with him I was, or how much I loved him despite he only gave me breadcrumbs. I've learnt to value myself. I've learn to not trust in everything a man says, and most importantly I've learnt to NOT CHASE a man. What I still have to learn is not to relate or to be attracted to shady guys, guys who are only after sex, players, liars...you name it. My guess is that I'm not emotionally available thus I look for unavailable men.
losangelena Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Katiegrl, I do too believe that when aman is into you, you don't need to chase them. I've came off as desperate in a previous relationship, chasing a guy and sending pictures (not nude!) of myself, thinking he'd fall in love with me if he just realized how beautiful I am or how eager to be with him I was, or how much I loved him despite he only gave me breadcrumbs. I've learnt to value myself. I've learn to not trust in everything a man says, and most importantly I've learnt to NOT CHASE a man. What I still have to learn is not to relate or to be attracted to shady guys, guys who are only after sex, players, liars...you name it. My guess is that I'm not emotionally available thus I look for unavailable men. OK, that's great, but then why do the exact opposite just because someone on LS suggested you text him? I'm sorry, but you can't just go around blaming others of things that you do.
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 OK, that's great, but then why do the exact opposite just because someone on LS suggested you text him? I'm sorry, but you can't just go around blaming others of things that you do. Last night I was insecure, I posted my questions here, two people told me I was acting wrongly, that I was playing this guy, that he was the one pursuing me, that me ignoring him will only make him uninterested. I chose to dismiss my gut, to dismiss all what I know about men, to just do something I've promised myself to never do again: to chase a shady man. Partly because I wanted a reply, a follow up for our fourth date. Because I liked him. And was afraid of losing him. I followed dumb advice. And I regret it. Another lesson learned. I know which people gives good advice here, and which people not. I perfectly know that, and now I've leant my lesson.
losangelena Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 Last night I was insecure, I posted my questions here, two people told me I was acting wrongly, that I was playing this guy, that he was the one pursuing me, that me ignoring him will only make him uninterested. I chose to dismiss my gut, to dismiss all what I know about men, to just do something I've promised myself to never do again: to chase a shady man. Partly because I wanted a reply, a follow up for our fourth date. Because I liked him. And was afraid of losing him. I followed dumb advice. And I regret it. Another lesson learned. I know which people gives good advice here, and which people not. I perfectly know that, and now I've leant my lesson. Then that's on you, not on them. I think if a man likes you, one text to them won't make them dislike you. He did ask you out for a fourth date, for crying out loud. If I hadn't been so tired last night I may have told you to do the same thing. 1
GR4 Posted December 26, 2015 Posted December 26, 2015 There is a difference in chasing someone and showing them you're interested in them you know. I'm not suggested you blow his phone up with lots of messages and calls but there is nothing wrong in admitting you like someone and you'd like to see them again. In fact it shows you're confident, mature and go after what you want. If he didn't reply to you it's not because you sent him a message it's because he wasn't interested. 2
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 Then that's on you, not on them. I think if a man likes you, one text to them won't make them dislike you. He did ask you out for a fourth date, for crying out loud. If I hadn't been so tired last night I may have told you to do the same thing. That's ok you give advice here based on your feelings, as I've read so far from your previous post.
Author brokengirl85 Posted December 26, 2015 Author Posted December 26, 2015 There is a difference in chasing someone and showing them you're interested in them you know. I'm not suggested you blow his phone up with lots of messages and calls but there is nothing wrong in admitting you like someone and you'd like to see them again. In fact it shows you're confident, mature and go after what you want. If he didn't reply to you it's not because you sent him a message it's because he wasn't interested. That's not what you said yesterday when you called me entitled. But that's ok, good luck to you.
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