Let's hear from men who are successful with women

[czen]

Personally I never dated anyone who I couldn't see myself being with in 5 years. Why waste my time and have a girlfriend for a year or 2 when I know that I'd never want to marry you?

 

A lot of people aren't able to see that far ahead so it's not for everyone. But if you can, it also makes the rejections hurt less because you knew that person wasn't a long term option to begin with so there's nothing to get bent outta shape over

Related to this, I think one big pro of being successful with women is that you are willing to walk away.

Like I know this one kid, really nice guy, successful in IT, but never had ANY romantic or sexual contact with a girl. I am legitimately terrified that he will be all over the first girl that shows him interest, gets in a relationship and then just sticks around even if it's bad, just because he has no idea how easy it could be to find someone more suitable for him. This is the reason why I think "playing the field", and that does not even mean you have to sleep around, is something you should definitely do, before settling down.

[2.50 a gallon]

As Bluefeather said, I could write a book

First steps to my success was freshmen high school, where I was the shortest and skinniest guy in the class. The school was full of pretty faces that I wanted to kiss, so had to find away to compete with the jocks. Noticed at the school dances, none of the guys knew how to fast dance, or bop. So I got onr of my younger sisters friends to teach me. Then I spent weeks practicing by myself.

As soon as the girls realized that I really knew how to dance, they began to hang around me, hoping I would ask them to dance, and that included the senior cheerleaders.

That was the first lesson, as the old song says, "Girl's Just Want to Have Fun" Dancing is fun to them.

Next problem, I needed to learn how to talk to women, without falling all over my tongue. I was painfully shy, when I blushed it hurt. So I began to force myself to talk to women I did not know, like those running the cash registers at the grocery store. I learned to just talk to them and pay attention to what they said. It was not long before they were telling me about their kids, their dog or their cat named Banzai. With practice I learned it was easy to talk to women.

 

 

Being different, where I lived lots of guys wore cowboy hats. Some gal braided me a leather loop to go around the base of the hat, and made it dangle off of the back a good six inches like tail. You would be surprised how often a gal would out of the blue tell m e she liked my hat.

 

 

In my college days I owned a pick up truck. I don't know how often I helped some cutey move, thinking that this might lead to a date. Never happened. So after that, forget the gas money, I was up front, how about a blow job. I hoped it would blow them off, some it did, but you would be surprised how often they agreed.

 

 

Oral sex, at that time most guys refused to go down on a woman. As a friend pointed out to me if you don't eat it before you screw it, it is a violation of the pure food and drug act. Once a gal found out how much I liked oral sex, I got lots of repeat business. Women talk and I had offers from gals I hardly knew

 

 

Sex! Another gal told me it does not matter how long you are but how long you stay in the saddle. I was able to teach myself a technique where I could last for a good half hour before climaxing, and then not pulling out, just relax and slowly start thrusting again. Good for another half hour or more. Repeat as many times as possible. More repeat business.

[Mrin]

I've had a great deal of success with women in all aspects and at all ages in my life. In agreement with others about definition of success here... So I'll toss my advice into two buckets.

 

Sex/Seduction: if your goal is simply to have sex with a woman or date her casually, then you go the pure seduction route. Basically you have to be able to read her and then provide what she desires. Not In a boyfriend my future faking way but more in a seductive and yes manipulative way. Think of it as akin to a QB that can read defenses. The QB that can, and can adjust the play or the execution of the play, will be far more successful that the guy who can't. I'll give you a couple of examples: I seduced a lady many years ago by being the daring worldly sort. You see, she had never really traveled or had done anything daring. So with me she got to experience that. I told her stories about things I had experienced. Our dates were whimsical and out of her comfort zone. But I made sure she felt totally safe doing them with me. Which is exactly what she was craving - in a lover not in a long term boyfriend.

 

I seduced another woman many years ago by being her "dark knight". She was fresh out of a divorce and wanted to be naughty. I indulged her. Now - what was kind of interesting is that I actually grew some feelings for her and tried to shift from a dark knight lover into a white knight boyfriend. Ya - that didn't work. Totally turned her off.

 

If you are good at reading women and can adjust then you can have lots of success seducing women.

 

Relationship - this is totally different and honestly far more satisfying. Here the name of the game is simply to be yourself. Sure you read the woman but you do that to be a good partner and to improve communication - not to drop her panties. Just be yourself and like yourself. If they like who you are, who you really are, then a relationship can grow. A few cold facts though: not every women will be attracted to the real you. That's okay and actually great because who wants to be in a relationship pretending to be someone or like someone.

 

Second cold fact: you have to like yourself and by liking yourself you will be confident. Most women are repulsed by men who engage in self loathing or low confidence.

 

Third cold fact: take a good look at who you are - your real self. If you don't like it, change. Don't expect the world to change for you. It is FAR easier for you to change yourself... Idiot. And you can change yourself. But you have to want to. No one can do it for you.

 

That's really about it - like yourself, be yourself and find a woman who likes the real you. When you do, treat her with respect and make sure she feels supported and secure in the relationship. In the end it all comes down to this - does she feel better about herself when she is with you? That comes from who you are, not hollow words of flattery (that's seduction stuff). If so, she'll grow feeling for you. If not, she won't.

[2.50 a gallon]

Find away to look at life as a positive. Live life and love it over that of everyday is another chit sandwich.

Most women love the holidays. Celebrate Christmas, put up a tree, decorate, if you can hang lights outside or at least in the windows. The lights are like a neon sign that says a man who enjoys Christmas lives here. Over that of a Bah Humbug guy.

Christmas 35 years ago, I was totally bummed, it should have been the first anniversary of my marriage, she was gone, I was living a thousand miles away from my home town and family and had just a people that I knew.

That is another thing, I always lived in large apartment complexes. Lots of women there. In this case I had just moved into a new apartment and did not know anybody.

When I chose my apartment, I did so carefully, it was a garden complex with facing apartments and sidewalks down each side with plants in between. I chose an apartment where the two side walks met. It gave me a larger space to put out a weber grill. I also bought a electric ice cream maker and began making home made ice cream every Sunday. I made friends quick. If somebody wanted to grill, it was in front of my apartment. It was not long before a couple of the neighbors threw in some bucks and bought a metal table to place near the weber where we could eat and share stories.

The first Thanksgiving, what do I do with 3 days off, other than watch football. To keep my mind busy I remembered that when moving I had found a bag of Christmas cookie cutters, my mom had given us. Many of them were from when I was a kid. So I baked Christmas cookies and then decorated them to the ninth degree. When I shared them with my new neighbors, some of them said next time you bake I want to help. I baked three more batches of cookies that season. Each time with a new gal, most brought over their favorite cutters, a bottle of wine, and they began to turn in to the little girl who baked cookies with their mom. In each and every case, I made them breakfast the next morning. Over the next 14 years, cookie baking got me laid a good two dozen times.

Can you cook? Learn!

After the break up of my marriage, in order to keep my mind busy, one of the things I did was to teach myself how to cook some gourmet meals. They took longer too cook, meaning less time for my mind to wander where my EX was and what she was doing. I got rewarded with a great tasting meal, and I figured it would help once I got back into dating. Bingo, boy did it ever.

For the past 20 years I have shared my life with a gal who is totally out of my league in the looks department, long legs, 8 years younger than me, a grandma of a 20 year old who still has an hour glass figure and flat stomach. Who also happens to be one of the sweetest and most giving gals I have ever met. Everybody loves her.

Third date, she came over to back Halloween cookies, followed by Thanksgiving and Christmas cookies. When her old boy friend came back from drug detox at Valentines day it was too late.

Guess who does almost all of the cooking.