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GUYS!..Do you still have a soft spot for your first GF or first love?

EC

By EC
in General Relationship Discussion

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blind_otter Established Member

blind_otter

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I'll always care about my first love, I wish him the best and hope things work out for him. But I told him recently that there was no way in hell we would ever be getting back together. He was crushed, but I had to be honest. So it depends on what you mean by "soft spot" - I suppose so, since I know that if he ever really needed me I would try to be there for him. IN as distant and non-sexual a way as possible. :p

NiCoLe20 Established Member

NiCoLe20

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i still have a soft spot for my first love. i was a freshman in high school, and he was a soph. we talked, wrote notes back n forth, met at this local place to hang out, hooked up.... then things started to fizzle b/c he moved to another town. even though he was 10 minutes away, i was busy w/ school, so was he so we stopped talking for 2 years.

 

we later catch up with one another and become boyfriend n girlfriend. i was a senior, he grad. a year ago, we were both driving so we hung out every day all day. he came to my prom, we had a wonderful time together, spent the whole weekend together, everything was perfect! we never fought, we were definitly in love with each other... well after i graduated, our family moved to florida 4 days later. i was so upset, i spent the night with him, we cried and cried when he took me home, all those ''club'' songs back then were all about us, every word described how we were with one another.... he drove down from nj to fl 2 weeks after i moved. he spent 5 days with me and we said goodbye again. fast foward to a year after that, i moved back to nj, to his town.... i contacted him b/c i missed him soooooooo much and wanted to see him so bad, but he had a girlfriend he was with for a couple months. this girl truely looks like me and ig uess it was his rebound, or replacement. their still together today ;( .. and its been 3/4 years since i moved back. i still see him around to this day b/c our town is small and my heart still skips a beat everytime i seehim... we just look at each other but dont talk ... it sucks but i dont want to ruin his relationship now.. i heard that their gonna get married and that upsets me but i cant do nothing about it... if i never wouldve moved, we probably would still be together but who knows.... im with someone now and im happy so thats what counts!!

greenhorn Established Member

greenhorn

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Soft spot for first love - let's see

 

 

I had only one love in my life till now and the experience I had out of it will always keep that love as the first and only love :laugh:

Nubemeister Established Member

Nubemeister

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I have a soft spot for my ex. He was an awesome man, the breakup we had wasn't ugly or anything. I loved him deeply too, but well he just didn't feel the same way about me. I guess the question is why? I don't really...lol. Overall he was a good guy.:)

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EC Established Member

EC

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SO to the ones that still have a soft spot....If you had moved one and your 'first love' came back to you would you drop it all and go back to them?

 

Or how does it feel to say I love you to your new person when you know your heart is owned by someone else?

 

Could you stand at the alter and say I do when you know you are settling and that your heart beat belongs to someone else?

blind_otter Established Member

blind_otter

Posted
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Originally posted by EC

SO to the ones that still have a soft spot....If you had moved one and your 'first love' came back to you would you drop it all and go back to them?

 

Hell no.

 

Or how does it feel to say I love you to your new person when you know your heart is owned by someone else?

 

The reason I can say "I love you" to someone else is BECAUSE he doesn't own my heart. No way, no how. That belongs to someone else. Namely, me.

 

Could you stand at the alter and say I do when you know you are settling and that your heart beat belongs to someone else?

 

AS above, he doesn't own my heart. I will always care about him and hope the best for him, but my feelings have subsided into a mellow, friendly inclination. And I could definatley marry someone else and not give it a second thought. I kinda feel like I settled when I married him. :laugh:

SexKitten Established Member

SexKitten

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every time i fall in love again, i seem to dismiss my last "love" as actual love. so with a new love, i think "this is love, the last one wasn't."

 

 

so, i don't know how i feel about the first time, since i don't feel like it's love now, or if it ever really was.

ReluctantRomeo Established Member

ReluctantRomeo

Posted
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Originally posted by EC

SO to the ones that still have a soft spot....If you had moved one and your 'first love' came back to you would you drop it all and go back to them?

 

She did. A couple of times. And I didn't.

snarky Member

snarky

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I definitly still have a soft spot for my first love (not my first "boyfriend" tho) ... and I'd say he'd probably say the same thing about me. Would I ever want to date him again? HELL NO. BUT we went thru a lot together, grew a lot together and definitly had a good connection back in the day. We still talk every once in a while and hang out on occaision, but not often. I think more than anything we sort of have this mutual understanding that we will be there if the other person needs us at the drop of a hat!

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EC Established Member

EC

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LOL It so weird that I started this thread and last night my mother calls me and tells me we have to have a going away party for one of my cousins. I was shocked and asked why and she told me he was leaving to Connecticut!

 

Since I moved out I haven't really been keeping up with the family gossip like before so I'm freaking out and she tells me that my cousin reunited with his first love, they were HS sweethearts, divorced his wife, left his job and is moving to Connecticut to begin a new life!!!!!

 

OMG! Its weird though because he always carried her picture. :love:

  • 2 months later...
kcitsmoob79 New Member

kcitsmoob79

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Yeah, I guess you could say that I still have a soft spot for my first love. So big, in fact, that I recently tracked her down after 7 or 8 years. We exchanged phone numbers and have talked on the phone a few times, but that's it so far.

 

My problem is that I'm married. I have seriously contemplated dropping everything and trying to get back together with my first love. Unfortunately, I don't have the nerve to dump my wife for her. I'd like to....but I just can't.

 

I guess you could say that I have more of a soft spot for the feelings I had with my first love rather than my first love herself.

RecordProducer Established Member

RecordProducer

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Not at all! :sick:

Pyro Established Member

Pyro

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No soft spot here. Being with my first GF/love would be hazardous to my health. :sick:

Art_Critic Established Member

Art_Critic

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I used to have a hard spot for my first love :laugh:

droopydad New Member

droopydad

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Wow, my first love. Along time ago but those feelings run deep. I think I've tried to use my first love as a measuring stick of sorts to compare every other relationship to, but none has ever come close. Even though I've been married 21 years, and I love my wife deeply and would do anything for her, it still doesn't compare to that first love. Maybe the excitement of the first time, or the rollercoaster ride of emotions I had at the time, it was truly a unique experience. I've never had a more physically beautiful woman either, she was perfect. I remember we used to get stopped often on the street because she was a dead ringer for a famous model at the time. Left me for another guy, took many years to get over it, as a matter of fact I still can get emotional over it when something reminds me of her. I lost the woman of my dreams.

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EC Established Member

EC

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:o I know the feeling
RecordProducer Established Member

RecordProducer

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I used to have a hard spot for my first love :laugh:

:lmao:

The hard spot always comes before it becomes a soft spot. :bunny:

  • 2 weeks later...
Kaotic Dizaster Member

Kaotic Dizaster

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Hi all ! This subject is so ironic .... Yes I have a major soft spot for my first love and it took me a long time to admit it . Here's a lil history .... met when I was 15 , he was 17 . Dated 11 months and got married . He went into the Navy and things fell apart . Now fast forward , I am now 31 and he is 33 and we have ran into eachother again . (I now have 2 daughters and he has a son .) Wow is all I can say , he is just everything I remember . Handsome as hell (especially in uniform , he's a cop now .... hehe) silly , sweet , and talked about how much he has always loved me ... I was floored I have to say , didn't expect to hear that from him . So now we are workin on getting to know eachother again and we are both hopeful but don't want to jump into anything to quickly especially with children involved because they have to be in agreement with our decision too ! Just thought I would add a happy note in this subject , hope ya all don't mind!

Iluvsiamese Established Member

Iluvsiamese

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No soft spots here--it's like it happened to someone else. There wasn't anything particularly traumatic about it, though I thought so at the time. Maybe my experiences since then have obliterated it??:laugh:

 

Is this more of a man thing than a woman thing, do you think?

 

My guy dredged up his ex again last night. :sick: I almost wish that she would show up so that we could get this over with.

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