DeeplyMissHer Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 A little history on on my past dating. I have had three girlfriends in the past. My first lasted six months. I was 16 and she was 15 so nothing serious. A few weeks after that break up I met my second girlfriend. I dated her for nine years and we have a daughter together: we broke up because I wasn't ready to grow up. I still love her and a part of me will always. It took two years before I could date again. My last girlfriend we were together for almost 2 years. We broke up two months ago. I know now I should have ended things with her a lot earlier then I did. A few weeks ago, a few days after I moved into my place I started dated this girl. I met her at a coffee shop she works at down the street from where I live. I frequented this shop everyday since I moved. We made small talk every morning for almost a week when I gathered the courage to ask her for her number. We texted a lot for a few days before we went on our first date. A simple dinner and a movie. It was fun and refreshing. Our second date we went skating and for a walk since the weather was nice. The third date, which wasn't really a date but we met for lunch together. The fourth date which was last night was nice but it felt off. It started around 4pm. I got off work early so had time to go home and have a shower before meeting her at her workplace. We went to the mall for so she could finish her christmas shopping. Then we went out for a nice supper at nice little diner. This is when things felt off. I enjoy spending time with her, but I have this nagging feeling. In our first date she mentioned she wanted to travel. She listed a few places she thought would be fun. Today during our supper she was talking about saving up to go to Europe and to find someone to go with her. I know I'm probably looking to much into it but the first thing that came across my mind was she was using me. She works at a coffee shop making barely over mininum wage, and I make a decent wage at my job. She didn't give me any direct sign that was so. The rest of the date went pretty well. I offered her to come spend the night at my house but she declined. No big deal since it's only the fourth date. We haven't had the "exclusive dating" talk yet. Am I overlooking things or should I go with the flow and see where this takes me?
GunslingerRoland Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 She was talking about saving up for it, so why are you assuming she is using you? I think you are reading way too much into it.
Author DeeplyMissHer Posted December 22, 2015 Author Posted December 22, 2015 It is just she mentioned it a few times over the course since meeting her. It kind of felt like she was hinting towards me. I don't know what the hell I'm thinking.
VeveCakes Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 I agree...means nothing, I talk about saving up for things all the time, not looking for a sugar daddy when I do lol
smackie9 Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 She's putting it out there an expectation of hers that she would like to travel someday in the near future, and would hopefully be with a lucky guy (YOU) to go with her. She's feeling you out. If you are not on board with the prospect of traveling with her as a couple, then you are wasting her time...this is what she is doing.
Author DeeplyMissHer Posted December 22, 2015 Author Posted December 22, 2015 I'm all up for going travelling. I guess I'm extra paranoid because I have my daughter to worry about and she is my number one priority. I guess I'm better off just going with the flow and see where things go from here. I'm trying to gather up the courage to bring up the conversation of going exclusive. I like her and I think she likes me. We kissed at the end of our first date, so it was a good first sign. We text each other a lot.
smackie9 Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 Yes go with the flow. You two are still getting to know one another.
Author DeeplyMissHer Posted December 27, 2015 Author Posted December 27, 2015 UPDATE: We are officially exclusive.
Buddhist Posted December 27, 2015 Posted December 27, 2015 Today during our supper she was talking about saving up to go to Europe and to find someone to go with her. I know I'm probably looking to much into it but the first thing that came across my mind was she was using me. She works at a coffee shop making barely over mininum wage, and I make a decent wage at my job. She didn't give me any direct sign that was so. The rest of the date went pretty well. I offered her to come spend the night at my house but she declined. No big deal since it's only the fourth date. We haven't had the "exclusive dating" talk yet. Am I overlooking things or should I go with the flow and see where this takes me? Yeah you are definitely overthinking things. So a woman is not allowed to have goals and dreams if she only makes minimum wage? That's pretty judgemental. She didn't say anything about you being that person and she's sharing an important dream of hers with you, thinking you guys are connecting. You seem to think woman = gold digger. I'd say you still have some growing up to do.
smackie9 Posted December 27, 2015 Posted December 27, 2015 UPDATE: We are officially exclusive. Good for you! all the best.
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