Xttnx Posted December 21, 2015 Posted December 21, 2015 So I'm a senior in high school and I followed this guy (who is an alumni of my high school and he is currently a sophomore at a university close to home) on instagram because I thought he's cute lol. He followed back right away and this happened a month ago. Then yesterday he friend requested me on Facebook (we have 27 mutual friends). He seems like a cool guy and someone my parents would like so I would really love to talk to him but I don't know if I should message him on Facebook? What should I say? I don't want to come off creepy because We don't really know each other... I consider facebook to be more personal than instagram so since he added me on Facebook, does that mean anything? What should I do I really want to get to know him/possibly hangout during winter break. Thanks!
casey.lives Posted December 21, 2015 Posted December 21, 2015 well.. follow up with a non- chalant thanks for adding me.. and make some crack about myspace days/icq days/msn messenger days (be sure to ask a question) and see if he reciprocates
Author Xttnx Posted December 21, 2015 Author Posted December 21, 2015 well.. follow up with a non- chalant thanks for adding me.. and make some crack about myspace days/icq days/msn messenger days (be sure to ask a question) and see if he reciprocates Should I even message him? Idk if he's interested and I don't want to come off as creepy.
Scarlett.O'hara Posted December 21, 2015 Posted December 21, 2015 If he doesn't want to talk to you then he shouldn't have added you on Facebook. 3
Author Xttnx Posted December 21, 2015 Author Posted December 21, 2015 If he doesn't want to talk to you then he shouldn't have added you on Facebook. True true haha. It's just he's a sophomore in college and I'm a high school senior so idk if that would be weird for him... Would it be chill if I asked him now he likes the college? He knows I got accepted there, he liked that instagram post.
Scarlett.O'hara Posted December 21, 2015 Posted December 21, 2015 Yeah, that sounds like a good ice breaker. Good Luck! 1
ExpatInItaly Posted December 21, 2015 Posted December 21, 2015 True true haha. It's just he's a sophomore in college and I'm a high school senior so idk if that would be weird for him... Would it be chill if I asked him now he likes the college? He knows I got accepted there, he liked that instagram post. I think this is a great ice-breaker. It's a legitimate question on your part and a nice way to open the conversation. Let us know how it goes! 2
d0nnivain Posted December 21, 2015 Posted December 21, 2015 I'm certainly not conversant in the ways of interacting on social media but I'd try something like, Thanks for becoming my FB friend. If you are going to be around over break maybe we can hang out. Do you know of any good parties? Understand though, a college guy might not want a HS girl for a GF, plus do you really want to put yourself through all of the angst associated with wondering what he's doing at school?
Author Xttnx Posted December 22, 2015 Author Posted December 22, 2015 I think this is a great ice-breaker. It's a legitimate question on your part and a nice way to open the conversation. Let us know how it goes! It went super well he usually replied right away to my messages after I sent them and we talked about the college and our majors. But I don't know what to say anymore to keep the convo going We were talking about the cheating policy and how ridiculous it is because u can't work together and he just said "EE major." "They say that but you know, everyone still does lol" so what can I say to keep a convo going?
Qboro90 Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 It went super well he usually replied right away to my messages after I sent them and we talked about the college and our majors. But I don't know what to say anymore to keep the convo going We were talking about the cheating policy and how ridiculous it is because u can't work together and he just said "EE major." "They say that but you know, everyone still does lol" so what can I say to keep a convo going? Ask him about the places to go and any fun nightspots. You can even fib and say you'll be going to visit your friend after the Christmas break so if he wants to link up at some point that'd be fun. Then give him your number. Or just send him a message with your phone number , followed by the words "Your move ;)". Flirty and puts the ball in his court. If he wants to talk more he'll text you. If not then you can move on and know he wasn't interested
Author Xttnx Posted December 22, 2015 Author Posted December 22, 2015 Ask him about the places to go and any fun nightspots. You can even fib and say you'll be going to visit your friend after the Christmas break so if he wants to link up at some point that'd be fun. Then give him your number. Or just send him a message with your phone number , followed by the words "Your move ;)". Flirty and puts the ball in his court. If he wants to talk more he'll text you. If not then you can move on and know he wasn't interested He lives in my hometown though haha. But idk I'm afraid since I'm a high school girl and he's a college student that he'll be creeped out that I would want to hangout with him. Since I might be going to his college I don't want to creep him out cuz it'll make it awkward next year
Author Xttnx Posted December 22, 2015 Author Posted December 22, 2015 He lives in my hometown though haha. But idk I'm afraid since I'm a high school girl and he's a college student that he'll be creeped out that I would want to hangout with him. Since I might be going to his college I don't want to creep him out cuz it'll make it awkward next year Like my friends told me not to because they think it'll make me seem desperate.
Erik30 Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 He lives in my hometown though haha. But idk I'm afraid since I'm a high school girl and he's a college student that he'll be creeped out that I would want to hangout with him. Since I might be going to his college I don't want to creep him out cuz it'll make it awkward next year No guy will be creeped out by that if he thinks you're cute. It only seems creepy to him when he doesn't like you. 1
Author Xttnx Posted December 22, 2015 Author Posted December 22, 2015 No guy will be creeped out by that if he thinks you're cute. It only seems creepy to him when he doesn't like you. I don't want to come off desperate either since we've never met in person before. What should I say? Idk how asking someone to hangout could come off as casual.. Like should I say "hey are you free this week? If so, do you want to grab coffee?" or idk I just don't want to come off desperate (
Erik30 Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 (edited) You could mention some upcoming event you might be interested in, or some new place you want to check out. That usually leads to the guy asking you out. If he doesn't pick up on that, just ask him if he would like to join you. Don't worry about coming off desperate, I highly doubt he would think that. Edited December 22, 2015 by Erik30
beautifulinside2 Posted December 22, 2015 Posted December 22, 2015 He lives in my hometown though haha. But idk I'm afraid since I'm a high school girl and he's a college student that he'll be creeped out that I would want to hangout with him. Since I might be going to his college I don't want to creep him out cuz it'll make it awkward next year I would actually tell him that you are researching college options and would like some insight into what he thinks about the school you plan on attending. I would go even further to suggest maybe a campus tour at some point in time.
Lansing Posted December 23, 2015 Posted December 23, 2015 My suggestion : "Do nothing"... I don't think you should ask him out. If he is interested he will make an effort. You can continue to talk to him but I wouldn't be the one to initiate conversation. There definitely is a "high school" / "college" dynamic possible here and you don't want to be THAT high school girl hanging on the every word of an "older" guy. What is the rush, let him make a move on you. He has all he needs to ask you out if he wants to.
Qboro90 Posted December 24, 2015 Posted December 24, 2015 He lives in my hometown though haha. But idk I'm afraid since I'm a high school girl and he's a college student that he'll be creeped out that I would want to hangout with him. Since I might be going to his college I don't want to creep him out cuz it'll make it awkward next year It's not going to make it awkward because college is not like high school. Everyone doesn't know everyone like they do in HS. No ones going to know or care even that you tried to talk to this guy, so don't let that hold you back. It's not like you're going to even see him on a daily or even weekly basis once you're at that college. You won't be in his classes because he's ahead of the courses you'll be taking, and unless you walk past each other on the campus, you won't be running into him at all. Since you've never hung out, he most likely wouldn't even recognize you next year anyways so there really is nothing to worry about in that aspect. If you're not a desperate girl then you're not going to come across as desperate. If you present yourself as assertive, outgoing, and social, then it will make you look mature and appealing to him and anyone else you like. When you give a guy too much credit just for being older and having a crush on him then you are making yourself vulnerable to being treated with less respect and maturity. If you approach it like it's high school then you're going to lose. Youre still in high school tho so it's not your fault, but I'm just advising you that the little clicks and crowds that you have in high school where you know about everyone's dating habits and who likes who... That's not as common in college. It's casual. If you think he's cute, ask him where he's going this weekend or next weekend, or tell him where you're going and if he wants to come he'll come. I think that giving him your number and making him make the next move is the best way to go. But it's your call. 1
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