Author RoosterFrame Posted December 23, 2015 Author Posted December 23, 2015 Two things I never put in OP -- 1. She applied lipstick after dinner as we were going to the cocktail party. 2. She asked to try my drink at the cocktail party. She wanted to be kissed. Don't think I blew it, but the no response to my text message has me confused (see above post).
Author RoosterFrame Posted December 27, 2015 Author Posted December 27, 2015 (edited) Hey All. Here's an update. I decided to send her a direct text asking her out for a fun daytime date including food and tree climbing (something she mentioned she loves). Given its time commitment (2-3 hours) and that it requires daylight, date is best done on a weekend or day off. She responded within an hour with the following: "That sounds super fun but I'm getting back on the 26the and leaving early the 27th. Gonna need to run around and get also minute supplies and pack. Maybe another day?" I was pretty busy that day (I went on a date and then went to a Christmas party with a bunch of friends) and couldn't send a thoughtful response until 7 hours later which was about 1am her time. My text read: "For sure. I get back from my climbing trip on the 3rd -- let’s shoot for sometime after that! Let me know if you still want the water jug or any other camping supplies and we’ll connect -- I also have a big stack of wood you’re welcome to if y’all want firewood. Hung out with a crew tonight who just got back from [where you're going] and they were glowing. Enjoy! : )" I didn't get a response back. Honestly, I don't feel too bad about that. I didn't ask a question, took 7 hours to respond, and sent it at 1am. My primary objective was to communicate that we'll reconnect for sure after the 3rd - since it was 11 days away at the time I sent that text, it's a bit too far out for me (and probably her) to make plans. My secondary objective was to let her know that my offer still stands for her to borrow some of my camping supplies because she mentioned they may end up needing them. As an aside learning experience, if you received my text message, are my communication objectives clear in the text? 1. Did her text response to my date request seem like she's interested or not? Why? Personally, I took it as a sign of interest but not a priority. She flew back into town after being gone for a week. Then, in the same day, had to buy camping supplies and pack for a weeklong road trip to the desert the next morning. I also know she's not making that up because she had told me her tentative travel plans during our first date and her best friend and her boyfriend invited me to hang out later and brought it up as well. 2. How to follow up after more than two weeks of dead time? The crux of dating around the holidays! I've never done this before. Much less with a supervisor! Any practical advice on how to re-engage given the circumstances? My thoughts on how to re-engage... Call her up on the night of the 3rd when I get back. Ask her how her trip was. Tell her a bit about mine. Ask her what the work schedule is for the week (I have to do this at some point regardless). Suggest a fun, group activity we should do together that week (I know of two already that she'd probably enjoy). When and how should I mention the date I brought up two weeks before? Here's my conundrum. I want to acknowledge it to show that I do have a memory and I'm not just spewing this stuff out there (something I've been aware of about myself in past dating relationships and may have done a little bit with her just as friends). I have to build up to the asking out again. We couldn't do that date for another week because it requires an off-day + daytime. Part of me says yes, that shows memory and interest and the other part of me says we need to get comfort levels back a little bit and a low-pressure, fun group activity is the perfect segue into said date. BUT I also don't want her to think I forgot about previous suggestion to do it after the third. She's not much of a texter for banter so I will probably lay off that. She's brought this up at work before and how she's read too much into a text and she unfairly ruined the start of a relationship (her problem, not mine but something to be aware of). I'll mostly be out of cell range as will she for the next week. Edited December 27, 2015 by RoosterFrame
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