katiegrl Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 (edited) So the guy got back today from his holidays. We have not seen each other for 2 weeks but messages daily. He has been back for a few hours now. He sent me a message saying he is at work. He didn't call or even suggest for us to meet up. I am busy tonight, so I told him 'would have loved to have dinner tonight but I have a prior engagement ' His response 'oh no, that sucks!' Why not ask about tomorrow? Or how long my engagement will be? I am traveling for work in 2 days, and I will be gone for 9 months, and he knows this. Surely he can put a little more effort. I think he is not that in to me. What does everyone think? As of now? He will not be hearing from me again. rv.....when you told him you had a prior engagement, did YOU offer an alternative day? If does not sound like you did. If not, why not? From the man's perspective .....when a woman is busy .....*if* she is interested, *she* suggests another day....when she is not busy. Sorry, but it does sound like you expect him to jump through hoops to pin you down ....and put all the effort in ....which isn't right. If you DID suggest another day .....then obviously you can disregard this post! Edited January 4, 2016 by katiegrl
katiegrl Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 (edited) So the guy got back today from his holidays. We have not seen each other for 2 weeks but messages daily. He has been back for a few hours now. He sent me a message saying he is at work. He didn't call or even suggest for us to meet up. I am busy tonight, so I told him 'would have loved to have dinner tonight but I have a prior engagement ' His response 'oh no, that sucks!' Why not ask about tomorrow? Or how long my engagement will be? I am traveling for work in 2 days, and I will be gone for 9 months, and he knows this. Surely he can put a little more effort. I think he is not that in to me. What does everyone think? As of now? He will not be hearing from me again. You are leaving in two days and will be gone for NINE months? WTF. I believe I read your post wrong.....initially I read it like he asked you out, and you were busy, but did not suggest another day. Then I read it again.....and he did not ask you out, correct? Just let this go.....you are leaving for nine months anyway....so what's the point? Edited January 4, 2016 by katiegrl
Author red.velvet Posted January 4, 2016 Author Posted January 4, 2016 You are leaving in two days and will be gone for NINE months? WTF. I believe I read your post wrong.....initially I read it like he asked you out, and you were busy, but did not suggest another day. Then I read it again.....and he did not ask you out, correct? Just let this go.....you are leaving for nine months anyway....so what's the point? Yes, he did not ask me out. I thought it was a good thing coming... So I was open to the possibilities of seeing where it goes. But I guess not.
katiegrl Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 Yes, he did not ask me out. I thought it was a good thing coming... So I was open to the possibilities of seeing where it goes. But I guess not. Where were you thinking it could go though? You are leaving and will be gone for nine months..... Not sure what you were thinking or expecting there.
Toodaloo Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 Sounds to me as though he is trying to ask you out but feels as though he is getting rebuffed. He is making an effort in my opinion. However I should just go away for your 9 months and be done. I don't think you two are on the same page at all.
salparadise Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 Sorry, but it does sound like you expect him to jump through hoops to pin you down ....and put all the effort in ....which isn't right. Yes, and for what... to set up nine months of texting with someone who can answer questions but doesn't respond otherwise? If you're going to be gone for nine months... are you thinking this guy ought to be pursuing for commitment? I don't get it. Why would you have any expectations at all under the circumstances, or think that he would? BTW, it's ok for women to ask questions too, or make statements or respond to either... I'm starting to wonder if I missed a chapter.
katiegrl Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 Yes, and for what... to set up nine months of texting with someone who can answer questions but doesn't respond otherwise? If you're going to be gone for nine months... are you thinking this guy ought to be pursuing for commitment? I don't get it. Why would you have any expectations at all under the circumstances, or think that he would? BTW, it's ok for women to ask questions too, or make statements or respond to either... I'm starting to wonder if I missed a chapter. Apparently, you did not read my subsequent posts...but yeah I agree.
Maggie4 Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 If I really like a guy, and I'm gonna be gone for 9 months, I'd ask to see him before leaving, and I'd tell him "don't forget me". But you're bored with him already. Could be a mismatch, but what about that really good first date? Give it another chance...?
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