theseaofred1982 Posted December 17, 2015 Posted December 17, 2015 I've known her for 2.5 years and we've been on and off none exclusive for a year now. This relationship we have confuses the hell out of me and sometime I'm left feeling empty. Long story short, every time we hangout we act and talk like a couple. She will even stay over and cook for me and buy me things. But at the end of the day we can both see other people. The problem with that is I really get hung up and on her and all my focus goes to her while she's out with other men. She's very attractive and constantly gets hit on. She's very open to casual sex and loves the rush of being with someone new. And I'm left feeling like her option. I don't know how long I can keep this up because my feelings deepens the more time we spend together. I agreed to none exclusive relationship with her due to fear of losing her. She tells me she genuinely likes me and cares a lot about me and have thought about actually being with me. How can you date casually to see if it can lead to something meaningful when shes completly open to see other men? Maybe it's just my ego because she's the only one I'm seeing even though I agreed to date none exclusive. I just want to have a better understanding where this is heading or have I been a fool for the past year? Every time she meets a new man, it last no longer than a few weeks. We've been at this for a year. So am I getting strung along while she out looking for something better? Even though she keeps saying I'm different than all the other guys? That we mesh well and we have lots of fun together? Those were her words. Do I need to completely back off and let go? Am I being too needy?
ashy555 Posted December 18, 2015 Posted December 18, 2015 She is stringing you along till she finds someone better. You agreed to a non exclusive relationship. Now you have deeper feelings and are only getting hurt. I know it is hard but you need to put a stop to it and move on before she does find someone else and ends it with you, and that will hurt like hell. She is wasting your time and preventing you from meeting someone special. Why don't you try and date new people? You need to speak up.
darkbloom Posted December 18, 2015 Posted December 18, 2015 You've never told her you want to be exclusive with her so how would she know? As far as she's concerned you guys are in a FWB situation. If you want more from her, you're going to have to do two things. First, accept that you may lose her. If you tell her what you want from her and it's not what she wants, you have to let her go. Otherwise you will end up in the same situation for another year with your feelings getting crushed because you are settling for whatever she will give you. Second, you actually need to sit down and tell her you want a relationship with her. An exclusive one. You can tell her that you haven't been dating anyone other than her because you realized you were developing feelings. But you have to let her know what you want. She may find it hard to go from your current arrangement into a relationship. Best of luck.
smackie9 Posted December 18, 2015 Posted December 18, 2015 You are different from the rest because you make a great friend.....that's it. If you don't like the situation you are in then get out by walking away, not hoping she will stop seeing other men and commit to you because that will never happen.
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