has this guy ever liked me or he is just a nice guy who does not want to hurt me

December 14, 2015

it is a complicated story.. I like this guy since I first met him. after my bf and I broke up. he showed his interest to me. he always came by say hi and always shows up around me and we began to have intense eye contact. I can feel we have intense chemistry there. when things just goes smoothly and I suddenly I found I was pregnant with my ex-bf's baby.... I was shocked, scared and I began to distance him..until one day I told him I was pregnant and I do not have any contact with him any more...but he knows I feel sad about it..he tried to re-contact me but I refused because I do not feel pregnancy is a sexy thing to date people.and it is unfair to him..

there was one day we met in the hallway and he give a deep look like asking me if I am ok...and we just cannot move away our eyes from each other...and since that day, I feel we re-connected again. I know nothing would happen between us and I am so appreciate he is still there for me when I still cannot withdraw my feelings from him...then we began to see each other everyday..no matter how busy we are...we will check on each other.. Until his ex shows up and want him back...I can feel he does not want to be back but he still see her when she need...and not very long she found there is something between us..she was mad and tried all her way to get him back..I was so insecure those days because I have nothing to hold on..when he was around, I even cannot believe it because I am having another man's baby and my belly will pop up very soon..how could he handle it...and he haven't ask for a date with me yet...

and one day I saw he came back from lunch with his ex...I can tell he was not that into it but feels like he is trying to do his responsibility...I don't understand why but I have a feeling there will be always her..she will be in the middle of us forever if there is a us..I just feel I cannot handle it any more...since that day I shut off all the contact with him and decide to let it go...I do not feel confident to be with him any more...he apologize many time, almost every day in the first two weeks...I know he even shouldn't feel sorry about it...he never say we begin to date...but he did apologize about it which make me feel he has connection with me and I am not nothing to him. but his ex continue pursuing him and he tried all his best to do his responsibility for her...I still distance him and never forgive him because I do feel his ex is a better option to him too.

1 and a half month later, it is xmas. before xmas eve, he apologize again and I still did not accept it because I think it is good for him to stay away from me..he was so mad and 2nd day, the xmas eve, he brought his ex for breakfast like they are getting back together...I was so sad...but I tried to pretend I did not feel anything..

1 month later, again we suddenly met in the hallway..also an eye contact to make us both feel, the feeling is still there...he try to reconnect but I refused because I really do not know what are we and another 2 months later I would deliver my baby...I do not think we can go anywhere..he was so mad...it is like I am giving him hard time and make things really hard on him..and he saw another guy drove me home (this guy likes me and it was a snow day..he just tried to be nice..but really nothing between us) this time I guess he felt there is really nothing between us.. he began to ask his ex out and had sex with her...she began to tell all the story to make sure I heard it from someone...however I do not think he enjoyed the rebound with his ex but I am not sure..maybe after sex, they will feel something like before..I do not know...I felt I am losing him and cannot hold my feeling toward him any more. I pursued him with my 8 month big belly..at the beginning he turned me down but I insisted until he was not angry with me any more and calm down to think..I asked him either he has a clear cut off with his ex and we can think where we are or I need a clear cut with him to move on...I really wish he will choose me although I hate to let a man choose me as an option but I like him so much... his attitude like he cannot have clear cut off with his ex..it is not the way to handle things like this...I understand him and I can feel he has been under lots of pressure between me and his ex...so I decided to move on and had a clear cut off with him...1 week later I began to stay at home to wait my baby's coming and never see him again.

I thought he would go back with his ex..but 4 month later, he transferred to another college in another city and another 3 months I heard his ex also transferred....

this is the whole story of mine. this guy never asked me out for a date, never defined our relationship. ..but I still miss him a lot... in the middle of nights, I always ask myself has he liked me or he is just a nice guy who doesn't want to hurt my feelings..was I right to decide to move on...if I wait for him, be there for him..will we really have a relationship...

I know he doesn't want to get back with his ex.. I feel she has something on her hand about him to not let him go..I heard from my friend that although he transferred but they still have contact...as a man, with his ex constant pursue, will he really come back to her.. she dose not want a marriage..she just want to have him as bf for ever even he would marry other girl. then will he finally agree this deal...maybe for a man, it is a great deal...I do not know...

I know it is not my business..but still miss him a lot...I do not know why...I just miss him and wish i can see him again..

thank you for your patient to read my story..it is so complicated and confusing...please give me some advice..has he like me..even he likes me but still not enough for him to make me as his girlfriend ...right? was I right to move on....or I shouldn't be that insecure to let a man I liked so much disappear in my life.. will he really go back to his ex...I really need to move on and forget about him...right...if there is any hope between us, he would ask me out and he it is a complicated story.. I like this guy since I first met him. after my bf and I broke up. he showed his interest to me. he always came by say hi and always shows up around me and we began to have intense eye contact. I can feel we have intense chemistry there. when things just goes smoothly and I suddenly I found I was pregnant with my ex-bf's baby.... I was shocked, scared and I began to distance him..until one day I told him I was pregnant and I do not have any contact with him any more...but he knows I feel sad about it..he tried to re-contact me but I refused because I do not feel pregnancy is a sexy thing to date people.and it is unfair to him..