Curiouswander Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Me and my ex dated for a little over 2 years. Ill start from the beginning we met in senior year in highschool she had recently moved states and when i met her i was kind of shy i ended up getting her number from a friend by next week she was the only girl i talked to i remember our first kiss i couldnt hold back for 7 months we were pretty much friends with benefits but only saw each other after noticing how much of a couple we seemed we decided to make it official. She never gave me those crazy obsessive emotions but she made me feel in a way no one else had it was always hard for me to tell her how i felt. But i tried and show her everyday. After senior year ended her parents left and she decided to stay im sure its safe to assume she stayed for me. She never really had a lot of friends and of course she didnt have any family here. So you can say for a little over two years she and i were all we had. I cant believe how much i got to trust her. Just like all relationships we had bumps but we got over them i told her that i would never leave as long as she tried id be there too. The last couple months of our relationship were hard i started being unattracted to her , and bored. I knew we could fix it but with life going on it kinda got away from me. she and i were always on good terms and even decided to get a puppy together unaware of how much work it was going to be. AFter 4 months of uncertainty i decided to break it off with her i told her we would still be friends. I didnt want it to end i assumed with the puppy and us being friends would bring us back together. I saw it as a break and she saw it as a break up. We broke up in September and for that whole month i saw her almost everyday. we still had sex and talked about us.. I remeber the last week of that month she cried in my arms begging for me back. She promised she wouldnt be so clingy and that we could make it work. I didnt say anything but held her kissed her and wiped her tears. Then out of nowhere in a week she switched up she posted a picture of another guy i took it very bad but i kept my cool. The next week i came to speak to her about of it and she was very defensive. I asked her what it was and she told me she wasnt going to be there for me forever and that the new guy in the picture made her feel a certain way i couldnt. The guy had tried to get at her a year before but my girl told me and she said it creeped her out how forward he was about liking her. He came in when she was vulnerable and lonely and i know this guy spoke with kind words and showed her he was the opposite of me. He did everything i failed to do. But what got me is how it ended i asked her what happend and she told me she didnt love me or care for me. I asked her what she felt for me and she said she didnt know. Everything seemed to not effect her while i literally felt my heart break on the inside. but i looked cool on the inside i told her i was sorry for how immature i was and that i wanted a second chance. She responded by saying that i had my chance months ago to fix everything and why i didnt say it before. I asked her what she meant when we slept together and she cried in my arms and she jus said that was a mistake. And i just left she told me to take my dog and leave her house. i came later that week to get him and i saw her and i went to speak to her i told her again i was sorry and she said she couldnt talk . Apparently her new guy had just gotten into an accident And later came to find out she slept in th e hospital for a month after just seeing him. nothing made sense to me i didnt know how to react. She told me to delete her and get out of her life and i did deleted everything that brought any memory of her and stopped talking to her. The very next week she texts me asking for my help to get into her car i found it weird i went and helped she seemed fine but i think she could tell i was dyeing inside but after i helped she thanked me and said bye and that was that i entered no contact in the hope that she would miss me. I contacted her after a month and half asking her how things went i sent it over fb but since we werent friends on there it went to a different folder. So i texted her on thanksgiving and pretty much said i was sorry for my actions and that she didnt deserve that but i also appreciated how true to me she stayed and that i wanted to wish her the best i updated her on the dog and that i was not bitter and there were no hard feelings but that i hoped that one day we could get back on talking terms. She then responded on fb that she was fine and not to worry about her she was fine and that she wanted us to move on that she found her happiness and that i will find someone to and not to messege her again i tried to respond but when i did it said i was blocked. As of this point im back into nc and back to square one missing her wanting a second chance. She took all of our pictures down and put a couple up of the new guy. I know it may seem black and white but i dont understand it. I tell myself that shes confused and just wants someone who will be there and help her. I want to say its a rebound we broke up in September and they began speaking in October it is now December so its about 3 months they have been together. Ive been doing what all the sites say focus on me and work on myself but at the end of the day shes still there . I just dont get how this happens i know she loved and cared about me there are certain things you cant fake i saw it in her eyes. Idk what im doing i keep this hope that she will come back to me but im just not sure. From my friends who know her say she goes on saying she found the one. How can you find the one in 3 months, they dont even know eachother enough will this fail or should i lose hope. Is it a good idea to ask her friend or her neice about her or would that come off as weird since ive only spoken to them a couple of times? I just dont know if its safe to assume shes gone for ever or if shes still hurt and relying on this guy to take my place.I hope shes confused i often wonder if he still thinks of me even if she doesnt want to admit it those little ideas that she does miss and think about me are what keep me going with my head up. I just wanna know is this a lost cause do i try one last time to get her back with the help of her friend an niece or do i let it go. Im just stuck with the hope of a second chance how long should i keep waiting..? The holidys and my bday is coming up i hope she contacts me. PLEASE HELP take the time to read and ask me questions i go back and forth on what to do. If i cant get her back i think i might just date somone even if its not right ...
mightycpa Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 It's a Curiouswander why you can't use capitalization and paragraphs and stuff. You must be on your mobile. 1
Meli22 Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 I didn't read all of it but I got to the point where your heart broke after she met someone else. This is the chance we take when we break up with someone. Unfortunately it's happened to you. Either your ego is damaged or, you thought you had her forever until this happened. You got bored and thought you guys would have a time out and, subconsciously, you wanted her on the back burner in case that person who DOES give you obsessive feelings doesn't turn up. They didn't. And your ex moved on. So now your subconscious plan is in the toilet. If you're ever with someone and leave them for the chance of finding someone or something better, then that relationship is over and it was never going to last anyway. I think part of your post is your damaged ego talking rather than your heart. It always hurts a little when the one who we thought would always be there, finds their match elsewhere. In the end, your heart probably wasn't fully in it for forever.
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