Karma

[ManyDissapoint]

This is the other misconception regarding Karma (in the strictest sense of its genuine concept)...

 

people think Karma is direct.

Well, it's not, always.

 

I too, have done 'good' things, but have experienced seemingly negative consequences.

 

The thing is, there is no way of knowing what those negative consequences directly relate to.

It's not linear. As such, we cannot ever assume or presume they are linked to a specific previous action.

 

But the fact - as I stated above - is not necessarily what happens to us.

It's how we handle it. that counts - for, or against - us.

 

I'm not sure why you are getting bogged down in the semantics. Yes the word Karma has been appropriated. That happens to a lot of words. We know what the OP is talking about. And this subject comes up frequently when dumpees wonder if the dumper will get their comeuppance. It's just a shorthand way of saying it.

 

In my experience, if they get their comeuppance, it's just coincidence. You will likely never know. But when it does, it is sweet indeed.

[TaraMaiden2]

I'm not sure why you are getting bogged down in the semantics.

It's not actually semantics. 'Karma' does actually mean something specific, it's not a question of semantics. It's a question of misunderstanding, or ignorance. And I mean that in the 'knowledge' sense, not in the 'pig' character, sense....

 

Yes the word Karma has been appropriated.

No, it's been MISappropriated.

It has been taken completely out of context, and used to denote a specific process that is entirely inaccurate to its correct meaning....

That happens to a lot of words.

For example....?

 

We know what the OP is talking about. And this subject comes up frequently when dumpees wonder if the dumper will get their comeuppance. It's just a shorthand way of saying it.

Comeuppance, payback, revenge... all just as easy to type as karma, and more accurate in their intended meaning....

 

 

In my experience, if they get their comeuppance, it's just coincidence. You will likely never know. But when it does, it is sweet indeed.

Comeuppance is indeed a coincidence.

Karma - isn't.

[mightycpa]

This whole "karma" thing seems to describe behavioral physics, if you will.

 

It seems to me that whatever it is that you do has an effect on you, and on one or many others. Just like when a billiard ball strikes another, it bounces off in one direction, and depending on the force, it causes the other billiard ball to move too, and maybe that one will strike others. It does not follow that the original billiard will get hit again and return to its original place, or that it will end up in one of the pockets. However, it does affect the play of the game.

 

Because you're presumably dealing with people who have free will, your bad action may not have the effect you think it does or should. Your victim might turn the other cheek, or turn lemons into lemonade, and stop your bad karma cold. Similarly, your act of kindness might turn into somebody's nightmare. So there is no tit-for-tat effect. To think so is exceedingly childish.

 

I think ManyDissapoint is right in a way. It's like using the wrong word, e.g., effect vs. affect, sympathy vs. empathy, or cursory when you mean thorough. We generally don't deliver vocabulary lessons when we encounter these mistakes. We know what OP is looking for. It's a lot easier to think you're being punished, that you've earned your misery than it is to simply accept that **** happens for no particular reason. But I don't think that OP deserved to get his heart broken just because he once broke somebody's else's heart. He may have deserved it, but not for that.

Edited December 18, 2015 by mightycpa

[ManyDissapoint]

It's not actually semantics. 'Karma' does actually mean something specific, it's not a question of semantics. It's a question of misunderstanding, or ignorance. And I mean that in the 'knowledge' sense, not in the 'pig' character, sense....

 

 

No, it's been MISappropriated.

It has been taken completely out of context, and used to denote a specific process that is entirely inaccurate to its correct meaning....

 

For example....?

 

 

Comeuppance, payback, revenge... all just as easy to type as karma, and more accurate in their intended meaning....

 

 

 

Comeuppance is indeed a coincidence.

Karma - isn't.

 

Meh a basic google search as well as conventional wisdom says that karma can at the very least also mean what comes around goes around. Words can eventually adjust what they mean depending on popular usage. That's why the dictionary gets updated.

[TaraMaiden2]

This whole "karma" thing seems to describe behavioral physics, if you will.

 

It seems to me that whatever it is that you do has an effect on you, and on one or many others. Just like when a billiard ball strikes another, it bounces off in one direction, and depending on the force, it causes the other billiard ball to move too, and maybe that one will strike others. It does not follow that the original billiard will get hit again and return to its original place, or that it will end up in one of the pockets. However, it does affect the play of the game.

Actually not a bad analogy; In Buddhism, Kama is often described, or likened to the ripples in a pond... they radiate outwards and continue but at some point, come bouncing back with variable intensity....

 

Because you're presumably dealing with people who have free will, your bad action may not have the effect you think it does or should. Your victim might turn the other cheek, or turn lemons into lemonade, and stop your bad karma cold.

I don't know if I'm understanding you correctly, but you cannot affect someone else's Kamma, (Pali, Sanskrit, Karma) you can only respond to it. If a person generates positive/negative kamma for themselves, that's it, done. The response form others may be unexpected and unpredictable, but it doesn't alter your intentions or what you did....

Similarly, your act of kindness might turn into somebody's nightmare. So there is no tit-for-tat effect. To think so is exceedingly childish.

as I have said, you're right - there IS no 'tit-for-tat'. But according to "The Laws of Kamma" (Which are long, convoluted and complex) an action WILL have a consequence. Not necessarily direct or immediate, but a consequence, nevertheless.

 

I think ManyDissapoint is right in a way. It's like using the wrong word, e.g., effect vs. affect, sympathy vs. empathy, or cursory when you mean thorough.

No, actually, it isn't. It's calling something by a specific name when it's actually nothing of the kind. Like calling a pressure cooker a casserole, or a skillet a waffle iron.

 

We generally don't deliver vocabulary lessons when we encounter these mistakes. We know what OP is looking for.

It's not a vocabulary lesson. It's a correction.

 

It's a lot easier to think you're being punished, that you've earned your misery than it is to simply accept that **** happens for no particular reason. But I don't think that OP deserved to get his heart broken just because he once broke somebody's else's heart. He may have deserved it, but not for that.

That's just it. Nobody can judge or evaluate what ANYONE deserves, for what and when.

It's an unknown.

Which is why it's always smart to play good.

 

The payoff, ultimately, is better.....

[Itspointless]

In my experience, if they get their comeuppance, it's just coincidence. You will likely never know. But when it does, it is sweet indeed.

Sounds like revenge to me, nothing karmic about that.

[roxan]

I'm not sure why you are getting bogged down in the semantics. Yes the word Karma has been appropriated. That happens to a lot of words. We know what the OP is talking about. And this subject comes up frequently when dumpees wonder if the dumper will get their comeuppance. It's just a shorthand way of saying it.

 

In my experience, if they get their comeuppance, it's just coincidence. You will likely never know. But when it does, it is sweet indeed.

 

Why people so often think that the "dumper"is always the bad guy for breaking up with the "dumpee?"

 

Sometimes its' all the "dumpee"'s fault if he/she gets dumped et they totally deserves it!

Exemple: if the dumpee is a liar, cheater or abusive, or just plain annoying, the why would someone have to stay with you and put up with your bad behavior??

 

One of my ex was like that, a compulsive liar and serial cheater. Face to face,he was always good at pretending the nice guy and loving boyfriend,but in reality he was an absolute scumbag.

One day,I received an email that he sent to many contacts at the same time,and among them was a really dodgy email adress,I found it was weird and looked on google and it was actually an asian escort agency based in London (where we both lived then). I asked him how come he got them in his contacts since he cc'ed their mail adress. He told me some BS about his email having been hacked and sending mails to people he doesnt know.

I got suspicious but decided to believe him.

Few months later,I started to notice he was adding regularly new female friends on facebook. At first, I simply thought they were co-workers or old friends,but at one moment it was just too weird that he would have some many new female friends. Plus given the fact,we were together during more than 2 years,I ve met his group of friends and never saw any of these girls.

And most of them were asians (I precise that I'm half asian myself)so I started to suspect he was adding these girls cause he was interested in them. I trusted my guts and contacted one of the girl(it was a Thai girl) he recently added asking how they knew each other. She told me they met on pof few weeks ago,then asked if "I was an ex??".I replied "no I'm his gf,we never broke up" and sent her screenshots of the texts he sent me that day to make plans for the weekend. Then she told me,he told her was single all this time and told her he wanted to have a relationship with her. Then,it became clear that many of the so called facebook friends he had on fb,they were actually girls he met on dating sites,and that he had "yellow fever"so he saved the asian escort agency because he was using prostitutes.

I immediately texted him to tell him that one girl told me everything so I know he was a cheat and dumped him.

He pestered me to take him back saying how he was sorry,that it was one huge mistake and that the thai girl was really gross,and disgusting,and he doesnt know why he cheated with her (he thought I only knew for her, but it was easy to guess for the others,and later I contacted other girls I suspected him of cheating with ,and they all confirmed)

He actually kept hassling me during 2 years seriously,sending me flowers at my birthdays and valentines,offering to take me on holidays to Bali,contacting from various numbers /mail adresses as I blocked him etc...

I never regretted my decision to dump him and not taking him back despite all his begging! He's a nasty scum,and I'm disgusted I wasted nearly 3 years with such a creep!