spiderowl Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Why would someone chatting to you on an online dating site ask if you were on any other dating sites? Not sure what a person is hoping to get from asking that question early on.
Redfisher Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 small talk? Or wants to see if they match or you are a player... 2
Author spiderowl Posted December 13, 2015 Author Posted December 13, 2015 Could be, I suppose. If I was a player, I might lie about that.
phineas Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Once I get that question or a question about how long i've been on the site, if i've met anyone on the site, or any questions about the site it usually means the woman has some kind of issues and she is going to stop responding no matter what my answer is. 1
losangelena Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 My guess is small talk? Like, "hey, you're on OKC, on any other dating sites?" I don't see any nefariousness in this question. No more than "what part of town do you live in?" Many people are on more than one site.
AspenBaldwin Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Because there's people who have so many profiles they can barely keep up with all the lying that they do. 2
Author spiderowl Posted December 13, 2015 Author Posted December 13, 2015 Once I get that question or a question about how long i've been on the site, if i've met anyone on the site, or any questions about the site it usually means the woman has some kind of issues and she is going to stop responding no matter what my answer is. Interesting observation. I still wonder why they ask.
Author spiderowl Posted December 13, 2015 Author Posted December 13, 2015 Because there's people who have so many profiles they can barely keep up with all the lying that they do. There is that, though not everyone is on more than one site because they are a player.
Ami1uwant Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 (edited) Why would someone chatting to you on an online dating site ask if you were on any other dating sites? Not sure what a person is hoping to get from asking that question early on. A few reasons...... 1. They thought they saw your profile on another site. From my experience you tend to see the same people in different sites with roughly the same profile and pics. With done people I conversed with on multiple sites. 2. To understand your experience with online dating sites. It's probably not a big deal with those in their 20s who are dating and on social media. If you are someone 35+ and back to dating ( after a long marriage). You may have a lot of hesitation meeting people through online sites since when you last dated you didn't use that avenue. If you are unsure meeting people through online you tend to take things a lot slower or you have a high chance of being flaky or a date no show. 3. If you only used one dating site it could say something about you and your personality type. 4. If you are actively on multiple dating sites you could be someone who is dating multiple people or you are very picky in who you date or you next everyone you date because the grass is greener. Edited December 13, 2015 by Ami1uwant 2
Myragal Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Shock. They may ask because they are curious. Regardless, if someone has the need to parse every sentence, question, nuance then OLD is not for them.
AspenBaldwin Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Regardless, if someone has the need to parse every sentence, question, nuance then OLD is not for them. I wonder what you 'really mean' by that. 1
newt Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Why would someone chatting to you on an online dating site ask if you were on any other dating sites? Not sure what a person is hoping to get from asking that question early on. I don't either because I thought it was weird when a woman asked me that same question 3 nights ago.
edgygirl Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Because they're the annoying type? I agree, it's too personal and kind of irrelevant. It's the same as asking someone you just met if they're dating other people. As of now, that's none of their business to be asking that, and they should know that most likely everyone is dating everyone until they find a person they would like to commit to. Why would someone chatting to you on an online dating site ask if you were on any other dating sites? Not sure what a person is hoping to get from asking that question early on.
newt Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Because they're the annoying type? I agree, it's too personal and kind of irrelevant. It's the same as asking someone you just met if they're dating other people. As of now, that's none of their business to be asking that, and they should know that most likely everyone is dating everyone until they find a person they would like to commit to. especially during the first conversation
Snakechammah Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Hahah! I am totally guilty of this. I've only met 2 guys off OLD. The first became my boyfriend (now ex) and I am now semi-dating the second. I am naturally curious of others' success rate in OLD so I have asked him how long has he been on the website, if he's been on any other website, how was his success rate, etc. Analytical sort of questions!! Not all girls who ask this are clingy or insecure. I am just curious to know how other people's experience has been on OLD. So why not just ask?? 2
phineas Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Because there's people who have so many profiles they can barely keep up with all the lying that they do. Prime example of what I was talking about above. If you suspect everyone online is there for nefarious reasons why are you even there? If every person you come in contact with has to prove they are not a pos to you then perhaps online dating isn't for you.
Gaeta Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 I am one of those women who will ask this question sometimes. I only ask this question when the man tells me he's new to the site. I want to know if he means he's new to pof or he's new to online dating. In my experience being new to online dating means nothing good. The newbies rarely will settle for the first woman they will meet even if she is a dream. They have a long road ahead of miss and try and I don't want to be part of it. I don't know why you 'assumed' this question had a negative quotation. 2
losangelena Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Yeah, I don't get the negative connotation, either. Oh no, they're making conversation, they're trying to get to know you, they must be so awful!! 1
Gaeta Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Yeah, I don't get the negative connotation, either. Oh no, they're making conversation, they're trying to get to know you, they must be so awful!! connotation was the word I was looking for lol, not quotation.
KatZee Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Once I get that question or a question about how long i've been on the site, if i've met anyone on the site, or any questions about the site it usually means the woman has some kind of issues and she is going to stop responding no matter what my answer is. Weird. I've never even thought about this. I've had pretty much every single guy who messaged me ask me variations of this question. 1. How long have you been on POF? 2. How has POF been treating you? 3. Have you met any interesting people from here? 4. How many people have you met from here? 5. How long have you been online dating? I've never once thought that these questions meant a person had something wrong with them, just that they were making conversation.
losangelena Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 connotation was the word I was looking for lol, not quotation. Oh! I didn't even realize what you'd typed!
Natalie8 Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Once I get that question or a question about how long i've been on the site, if i've met anyone on the site, or any questions about the site it usually means the woman has some kind of issues and she is going to stop responding no matter what my answer is. Could you please expand on this a bit. Why do you feel it is a sign of having issues? I almost always ask this question yet im not someone who disappears on guys for no reason. I ask it as a way to make conversation and get to know their attitude on dating. Sometimes their reply can be pretty telling. Im on 2 dating sites, genuine photos, genuine profile. Not lying to anyone and im certainly not a player. I would really like to meet someone so making the most of the tools i have as well as being proactive about it in real life. I think a real player wouldnt tell the thruth anyway and i have always thought that questions about only dating experiences was a good way to break the ice. Nothing sinister or dodgy about it in my view
phineas Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 Could you please expand on this a bit. Why do you feel it is a sign of having issues? I almost always ask this question yet im not someone who disappears on guys for no reason. I ask it as a way to make conversation and get to know their attitude on dating. Sometimes their reply can be pretty telling. Im on 2 dating sites, genuine photos, genuine profile. Not lying to anyone and im certainly not a player. I would really like to meet someone so making the most of the tools i have as well as being proactive about it in real life. I think a real player wouldnt tell the thruth anyway and i have always thought that questions about only dating experiences was a good way to break the ice. Nothing sinister or dodgy about it in my view Gaeta provided reasoning for why a woman wouldn't want to date newb. If I'm on the site too long then why? because i'm a player? Because i'm a loser? If i've met multiple people off the site why am I still there? Because i'm a player? because I'm a loser? If i've met nobody or very little why? Did I leave the site for a bit then come back? Again, why? maybe i'm on the rebound/ Do you see the pattern? I've met a few women off these sites and women LOVE to talk. Every woman is different but they all have their own ideas on men off the site & how long they have been on the site & how many people they have met. It is no coincidence that when they ask me this question on the site they disappear shortly after. Now if we are on the date or on the phone talking and they ask, whatever I say doesn't seem to matter at that point & I consider it conversation.
Author spiderowl Posted December 18, 2015 Author Posted December 18, 2015 Shock. They may ask because they are curious. Regardless, if someone has the need to parse every sentence, question, nuance then OLD is not for them. I don't agree. Nuance makes all the difference.
Bobbi7 Posted December 19, 2015 Posted December 19, 2015 At least 99.9% of the people are on at least 3 dating sites...of course easy ways to find out-google their usernames/google image search their pictures. That's how I find out. Plenty of Fish and Okcupid are the most popular.
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