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what do I do now


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Posted

So I started hanging out with this guy about 6 to 8 months ago. We hungout a few times and fun and whatnot but ended up just... not working out. To be honest he kinda broke up with me and said he wasn't interested......just not into it. So....later...right now he gets ahold of me saying he was wrong and that he still likes me and he did like me but wasnt into a relationship at the time. I let him come over yesterday. He seemed much nicer this time and took the time to talk to me and stuff....ask questions. I just dont know....really whether his interest is sincere. How would I know if it was?

Posted

You couldn't have been broken up if it was just hanging out.

 

It sounds like he was into someone else and that didn't pan out so now he comes crawling back.

 

Plan B, option 2, pick one.

 

This very thing happened to me just last week. I didn't give him the time of day.

 

You should be someone's priority, not an option.

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Posted

Ya your right I probably shouldn't have talked to him again.

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Posted

Recently I received a message on facebook from a guy that I knew a long long time ago. Like ten years. He lives in a town just over two hours from me. Hes been talking to me as I used to live in his town years ago. He asked me if I ever visit..... I sent him a joke msg saying we should hangout see u in 2.5 hrs after we had talked for a few days straight. ...he didn't answer that was three weeks go. So recently I shot him another message. I said I will let you know if I am ever in your town...

 

He said to me... come visit me anytime. I cant wait for you to come visit blabla we'll play it by ear and even maybe do the long distance thing...if things worked out. We were really young when we met...19 and 22...now we are 31 and 34...but have not seen eachother in a longgg time. I wonder why he seemed standoffish after the see you in 2.5 hrs thing..and now he seems soo interested. I really did and maybe do like the guy so its kind of weird.

 

I don't want to get ahead of myself..but I like him...I used to have a big crush on him.... back in the day it was just bad timeing for us both...

Posted

You are getting ahead of yourself. When is the last time you saw this guy in person? Go see him. You may be surprised to find there's nothing there anymore. You're both different people than you were ten years ago. Why waste time speculating?

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Posted

Good point mid west. Gotta go see him...find out.

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Posted
You are getting ahead of yourself. When is the last time you saw this guy in person? Go see him. You may be surprised to find there's nothing there anymore. You're both different people than you were ten years ago. Why waste time speculating?

 

So I now later have determined this guy is straight up playing games. He was using me to boost his ego and didnt actually like me. We texted for a few days...then when he realized I liked him again...he backed off. This is how he used to be when he was younger but I had hope he grew out of it. Immature. :bunny: so anyways...I just had it when I asked him when I get to come to visit him and got no response...

 

I just left it at that.. he can do what he wants...I deleted him off facebook. I dont really put up with that stuff anymore..

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Posted

Dude is just farming contacts. Beating the bushes to see what comes out. Good riddance.

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Posted

I am pretty hurt and mad I said if you ever want to be serious about anything heres my cell otherwise have a nice life pretty much..

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Posted

I recently started talking to a guy I haven't seen in years. He lives two hours from me but said he was interested to maybe start a relationship or see how one might go. Anyways we started talking and then his responses became less and less...he played games back in the day but we were young so I called him on it.

I said.... what the hell I am to pretty for this are you playing games or what? I had just asked him when I get to see him ...that's all I had asked.

His response was \I am busy and work three jobs and my moms dieing of cancer my dad just had a stroke..and that he is under stress and doesn't need extra drama...and that I am crazy/clingy. I am really hurt he said this to me..I didn't know what to do so I just said I am sorry you feel this way about me and I am sorry about your mom I wont bother you anymore..

Posted

It means he isn't interested and any contact you make especially "calling him on something" is unwanted. It would be in your best interest to leave him alone and move on.

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Posted

Thank you

 

I pretty much get that too.. he isn't interested in talking to me.

Posted

Also, don't ask when you "get to see" someone who hasn't consistently shown interest. When a guy contacts less and less and distances himself, you do the same. Don't chase.

 

Starting a relationship with someone who lives 2 hours away isn't a good idea anyway. The momentum you would need to start a solid relationship can only be done in person.

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Posted

well thank you I know. I really had feelings for him from what I knew of him though. I know it could be done. we could see eachother on weekends. He just said he was busy but I needed to dial it back I guess..

 

But if he doesn't want me not much I can do your right.

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Posted

I really wanted it to workout.

Posted

Find someone who doesn't play games. He doesn't sound like a catch at all.

 

Invest your heart and feelings only in someone who has earned it over time.

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Posted

when you put it that way it makes a lot more sense. someone who doesn't even wanna see me how much can that be worth.

Posted
when you put it that way it makes a lot more sense. someone who doesn't even wanna see me how much can that be worth.

 

Not a second more of your time, energy, or thoughts!

Posted
I recently started talking to a guy I haven't seen in years. He lives two hours from me but said he was interested to maybe start a relationship or see how one might go. Anyways we started talking and then his responses became less and less...he played games back in the day but we were young so I called him on it.

I said.... what the hell I am to pretty for this are you playing games or what? I had just asked him when I get to see him ...that's all I had asked.

His response was \I am busy and work three jobs and my moms dieing of cancer my dad just had a stroke..and that he is under stress and doesn't need extra drama...and that I am crazy/clingy. I am really hurt he said this to me..I didn't know what to do so I just said I am sorry you feel this way about me and I am sorry about your mom I wont bother you anymore..

 

Oh, paleeze!!! Either this is a bulls*it thread or he calls them as he sees them -- desperate. He was fading and you didn't get the message . . .

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Posted

I am busy and work three jobs and my moms dieing of cancer

 

Did you know this when you were talking to him or did he spring this on you after you started contacting him?

Posted
well thank you I know. I really had feelings for him from what I knew of him though. I know it could be done. we could see eachother on weekends. He just said he was busy but I needed to dial it back I guess..

 

But if he doesn't want me not much I can do your right.

 

 

I really had feelings for him -- Really, over the internet?

 

I really had feelings for him from what I knew of him though -- you said you knew him to be a player . . . you didn't know who he was NOW. Until you had the real opportunity to see who he was NOW, you should assume he hadn't changed.

 

Grow a set, woman. Get confident, secure, and independent. Stop reaching out to guys from the past and look to your future!

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Posted

I appreciate all of your input. Yea people I guess don't change. I told him I wouldnt be contacting him anymore anyways. I hardly think I was acting desperate. Guys a jerk.

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Posted

The cancer and work thing I had no idea of until now but its fine it's over.

Posted

As the others have said, he's definitely not interested.

 

Just stop contacting him.

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Posted

Ya thats pretty clear... too bad for him. His loss.

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