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How does a girl score ...

StBreton

By StBreton
in General Relationship Discussion

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StBreton Established Member

StBreton

Posted
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Reading a thread started by Hopful30 (and not wanting to hijack her thread) led me to start this thread:

 

How does a girl score a DWeRP? (Dude with Relationship Potential)

 

 

  • DWeRPs: What has made you guys want to "close the deal" on a certain girl over another?
  • Girlfriends of DWeRPs: What things do the girls think helped "close the deal" for a certain dude with relationship potential?

 

Would be helpful to readers if bullet points utilized;)

 

Could be shallow things like nice body, beautiful

Could be characteristics like spontaneous, go with the flow, laughs at your jokes, warmth, good sense of humor, gregarious, good wife skills...etc etc

 

What caused that "click" moment...even if it was a combination of things

 

Try to be as specific as possible:)

  • Like 1
T-16bullseyeWompRat Established Member

T-16bullseyeWompRat

Posted
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1) makes me feel good about myself

2)makes me laugh

3)is cute

4)read number 1 again

  • Like 2
central Established Member

central

Posted
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Difficult question to answer accurately, other than the usual "I know her when I see her."

 

However, for me it's always a complex combination of traits, which must include most (preferably all) of the following:

 

  • attractive to me
  • intelligent
  • warm and caring (not jaded or harsh)
  • good ethics based on sound reasoning
  • loyal, supportive and encouraging
  • sexual, high libido, initiates and shows creativity
  • reciprocates my interest and communicates well

 

And there must not be any of these negatives: smoker/unhealthy habits, vain, materialistic, irresponsible, controlling, manipulative, selfish, religious/superstitious, or very conservative.

  • Like 4
Redfisher Established Member

Redfisher

Posted
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She craves me.....And Boobs.

mortensorchid Established Member

mortensorchid

Posted
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Quite honestly, if he calls after our first get together within 24-48 hours. If any later than that, I know he's not interested or not that into me.

winny Established Member

winny

Posted
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  • Makes me laugh
    Genuine, reliable, honest
    Spontaneous and never says no to try something on the spot
    Not scared of PDA
    Pampers me and makes me feel special
    Gets along with people
    Good listener
    Supportive of my career and not intimidated by my personality or success
    Doesnt act possessive and gives me space
    Works out and takes care of himself
    Doesnt act selfish in the bedroom

  • Like 1
phineas Established Member

phineas

Posted
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NOT insecure.

Not overweight.

Not your typical facebook/snapchat overdosing selfie junky with a whole solar system of orbiters feeding her attention daily trying to get into her pants.

 

has job. A real job.

Thanks me for taking her out before I get home from the first date.

Sex is good.;)

  • Like 2
winny Established Member

winny

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Not your typical facebook/snapchat overdosing selfie junky with a whole solar system of orbiters feeding her attention daily trying to get into her pants.

 

Haha I love this one..

Hopeful30 Established Member

Hopeful30

Posted
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1) makes me feel good about myself

2)makes me laugh

3)is cute

4)read number 1 again

 

Definitely the bolded. I need to be able to be my True Self, otherwise I feel the relationship won't be genuine (at least not for me) and I can't have that. I would definitely emphasize this point. If you can be yourself and feel good for it, then that's a keeper for sure! (plus finding him attractive as his Truest Self also)

 

I think that's where many problems lay though. We are all full of emotional issues (childhood, past experiences, things we have seen etc). We aren't focused enough on improving ourselves, which is why the relationships we find while NOT our true selves...well they fail. At least that's what I believe.

 

Nothing more attractive than a man who has eaten sh*t his whole life, and still smiles because he's bettered himself and wants to continue healing/improving.

 

That and compassion/kindness. I can't stand when a man talks down about animals or other people. One thing that made me realize how much I loved one of my exes was when I asked him to kill a spider, and he said no. Instead he caught it in a cup and let it outside. I had never been so smitten with a man. Really caught my heart.

xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
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With the right guy, the best version of yourself will bring out the best version of him, and vice versa. IMO, he should lead. That's the best way to identify a DWeRP.

  • Like 2
Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

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In my quest to understand why a woman like me is still single after all this time searching I was told many times by men:

 

There is nothing specific that will make a man connect with a woman, it will just happen. She may have nothing on his list of requirements but he connects with her and he'll want to be with her. On the other hand he may meet a woman like me who's got everything a man would want and he won't connect.

 

In my experience I have also noticed that men like feeling needed. It's in their nature to provide, care, protect and they often will connect with a woman that inspires these feelings in him.

 

Unfortunately I don't need to be protected, cared for or provided for. It's been my worse enemy in finding a man.

  • Like 1
Hopeful30 Established Member

Hopeful30

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Unfortunately I don't need to be protected, cared for or provided for. It's been my worse enemy in finding a man.

 

Really?

 

So in your tastes, you want to date a man who doesn't feel the need to protect you? That's very weird. When you love someone, you instinctually want to protect them...

 

To me that sounds like you want a man who won't love you enough to protect you (even if you don't need it).

Redfisher Established Member

Redfisher

Posted
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In my quest to understand why a woman like me is still single after all this time searching I was told many times by men:

 

There is nothing specific that will make a man connect with a woman, it will just happen. She may have nothing on his list of requirements but he connects with her and he'll want to be with her. On the other hand he may meet a woman like me who's got everything a man would want and he won't connect.

 

In my experience I have also noticed that men like feeling needed. It's in their nature to provide, care, protect and they often will connect with a woman that inspires these feelings in him.

 

Unfortunately I don't need to be protected, cared for or provided for. It's been my worse enemy in finding a man.

 

Is this not the opposite of your signature? Is that not love?

  • Like 1
Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
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Really?

 

So in your tastes, you want to date a man who doesn't feel the need to protect you? That's very weird. When you love someone, you instinctually want to protect them...

 

To me that sounds like you want a man who won't love you enough to protect you (even if you don't need it).

 

Of course if I am being attack I want him to protect me. What I am saying is I don't need a man to protect me against life. I have been single for 11 years. I am more career successful than most men I date, I earn more, I have more stability, I have attained most my life goals. A man in my life doesn't need to step in and better my life. I got everything under control. For these reasons I was told many time I am intimidating.

Redfisher Established Member

Redfisher

Posted
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I understand you don't need it... But why not accept it?

  • Like 1
xxoo Established Member

xxoo

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Unfortunately I don't need to be protected, cared for or provided for. It's been my worse enemy in finding a man.

 

Forget need.

 

Can you humble yourself enough to let him?

 

My husband doesn't "need" me to do all the things I do for him, either. But he lets me, and he appreciates it.

 

Mutual vulnerability is essential to relationships.

  • Like 6
Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
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Is this not the opposite of your signature? Is that not love?

 

My signature is about a man making a woman believe he will love her when he has no intention of doing so.

Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
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Forget need.

 

Can you humble yourself enough to let him?

 

My husband doesn't "need" me to do all the things I do for him, either. But he lets me, and he appreciates it.

 

Mutual vulnerability is essential to relationships.

 

Maybe I can't after all those years alone.

 

I have always been the strong one. I am the strong one in the family everyone turns to. I am the smart one everyone turns to at the office because I can solve everything. I am the strong one my friends turn to because I am emotionally strong. Honestly I don't know how to be vulnerable.

Redfisher Established Member

Redfisher

Posted
Posted
Maybe I can't after all those years alone.

 

I have always been the strong one. I am the strong one in the family everyone turns to. I am the smart one everyone turns to at the office because I can solve everything. I am the strong one my friends turn to because I am emotionally strong. Honestly I don't know how to be vulnerable.

 

And you are still single after years and over a hundred men? No offence and I'm sure you are great but the problem seems to be on your end to a certain degree? What do you think?

xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
Posted
Maybe I can't after all those years alone.

 

I have always been the strong one. I am the strong one in the family everyone turns to. I am the smart one everyone turns to at the office because I can solve everything. I am the strong one my friends turn to because I am emotionally strong. Honestly I don't know how to be vulnerable.

 

To attract a man with relationship potential, you must be a woman with relationship potential.

 

Strong here is a euphemism for closed off.

 

It truly takes strength to trust and be vulnerable.

  • Like 4
Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted
And you are still single after years and over a hundred men? No offence and I'm sure you are great but the problem seems to be on your end to a certain degree? What do you think?

 

I agree 100% the answer is within me.

  • Like 1
notinept Member

notinept

Posted
Posted

Just one quality that does it (sets her apart) for me in an instant every time;

 

* She's clearly a woman, independent, more than capable of taking care of herself - yet she still has a vulnerable little girl side to her that wants to be taken care of ...

 

Ohhh hell yeah ! That second part just melts the heart of the 'protector' in me ! :love:

 

Well ... and then all the usual stuff (looks, brains, similar interests etc.) of course.

  • Like 2
Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted
To attract a man with relationship potential, you must be a woman with relationship potential.

 

Strong here is a euphemism for closed off.

 

It truly takes strength to trust and be vulnerable.

 

I agree. So if we relate that to StBreton's question a man expects a woman to be vulnerable, he wants to protect her, care for her and provide for her. Right?

 

I fail in the vulnerable department = I am still single.

  • Like 3
Gaeta Established Member

Gaeta

Posted
Posted

 

* she's clearly a woman, independent, more than capable of taking care of herself - yet she still has a vulnerable little girl side to her that wants to be taken care of ...

 

Ohhh hell yeah ! That second part just melts the heart of the 'protector' in me ! :love:

 

 

bingo.......

xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
Posted
I agree. So if we relate that to StBreton's question a man expects a woman to be vulnerable, he wants to protect her, care for her and provide for her. Right?

 

I fail in the vulnerable department = I am still single.

 

Appropriately vulnerable. I do think men should lead, and women should respond. This is true for vulnerability, too. I do not think that women should make themselves vulnerable to men who've not offered like vulnerability. Women have more risk (physical danger, pregnancy, etc).

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