heartbreakkid15 Posted December 11, 2015 Posted December 11, 2015 I guess it's time I let it out.. 4 weeks ago me and my ex split up.. well the first week was a "break" said she needed time to miss me (trying to let me down softly) I asked her only once to reconsider and she wanted to do the break so I did.. the following Friday she says "feelings have changed and we should work on ourselves" I asked one time that night "are you sure?" She texted "I'm sorry but it's just not there anymore".. Now let's get to the relationship... 3 years ago we met and it was true love at first sight.. I was 21 and she was 24.. we fell in love instantly and moved in about a few months later and we loved every moment of it.. the next year we get our first apartment together, we were both working so it was great... even got her a puppy for her birthday... finally she gets a teaching job offer in a new state and she told me she's not taking it because she couldn't leave me behind. I told her don't worry I'm coming, nd we left.. a new state, a new start, a new life and it was amazing! Truly. We loved it, explored everyday and spent time with our baby (our dog).. reality finally kicks in and she starts teaching and it's awesome! She'd get home, tell me all about it and I loved to hear her crazy storys! I was glad to her reach her dream and she knew that! But sadly.. I couldn't find a job, applied everywhere but no call backs.. each week I got more and more frustrated... until I gave up hope and stopped applying.. I got lazy and too comfortable with the fact that my girl was working and paying for everything (I know I'm an idiot) she didn't even care because she was so excited about her new job to even notice.. so after the summer passes I told myself I'm not being lazy I'm getting a damn job.. but.. I didn't and once again I get lazy, and I stop doing things I use to, like paying attention to her stories and actually caring about her job.. I never ask how her days were.. until a 4 weeks ago when she asked for the break and I knew deep down it was over.. Let's fast forwarder now.. these past 3 weeks since I'm back in my old state I've decided to fix myself.. I got a new job, cut my hair(had long hair, needed a change), began working out everyday, applied for online college, changed my appearance and I'm just all around feeling so much better! But I still miss her because I came to grips with knowing I truly failed this relationship... I want her back so bad.. I've Been doing no contact for 3 weeks and it's been good.. but i screwed up yesterday. She texted me asking if I got my boxes in the mail, I shouldn't of replied but I did I simply said "yes I got them, thanks" and she replied "sorry to hear about you and ur sister" she says this because she saw my fb status of me and my sister arguing... I replied "don't apologize about my problems, I'm doing good and staying away from it" and she said "good! Hope hazel likes her toys, I made sure to pack her favorite one" nd I still like an idiot kept replying and I said "yes she is running around with it now" she never texted back after that.. nd it sent me all the way back to square one of NC because I spent all day today checking my phone to see if she'd text nd I got nothing.. I truly fixed my self and I'm happy and way more confident but no matter how happy I get, I know I truly miss my soulmate but I know she doesn't miss me.. and she still have all of our pictures all over social media..
Scarlett.O'hara Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 She might miss you, just not the person you were turning into. You are taking positive steps in your life, focus on that and keep looking forward. If she is truly your soulmate, somewhere down the line you might reconnect, but right now you need to focus on yourself.
Gmuck Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 There is no way in 4 weeks you have changed that much. I applaud you for changing up your appearance, I did the same at a much later date, but everyone including your ex know it's just post break up I've changed bs. It takes much longer for real change but keep what you are doing after months of you are still doing it, you've made change. You need to go ghost on this girl. Too much contact and her texts sound like friend zone already. Look at it this way. If you see her or talk to her in anyway you are actually helping her get over you. You are making it easy for her. The more you talk the less guilty and unsure of the break up. You got one chance at 4 weeks post break up. Go ghost. Disappear and unfriend/block all social media. You have too. Dint believe me, she commented about you fighting with your sister online. You just gave her a other reason to move on. To find a new guy who doesn't fight with his sister and especially not on Facebook. Lame dude. All those pics will stay up probably for another month. At 2 month mark they will come down. There will be another guy eventually and you hanging around, texting her back, friends on social media is helping her with her detachment of you slowly. Again, you got one chance my fiend. Go ghost immediately.
marky00 Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 There is no way in 4 weeks you have changed that much. . Actually I kind of disagree. His situation sounds very similar to mine. He was in a rut, he knew it, kinda of wanted to get out of it but got overwhelmed. He was definitely going to get there in the end but she couldn't wait. He was working through a process and her leaving him was the final part of the process. In my case, I made massive improvements in the last 6 months of my relationship but I guess it was too late. Im my case, I don't think I needed to make improvemnts, I had done the main ones but the challenge was to not sink down after the breakup. So it wasn't self-improvement but more maintaining who I was at time of BU.
Recommended Posts