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Does Ex Want Me Back or Is She Over Me? I Need Help Girls!!

brokenhearted24

By brokenhearted24
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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brokenhearted24 New Member

brokenhearted24

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Ok heres my sitch. Me and my girlfriend have been together for 8 months. One month ago yesterday, she ended things with me. She said I needed to go and that she wasnt happy. She said maybe in a few weeks, to a few months we can get back together. I moved to another city which is about 5 hours away. On the way there we talked and I tried to get her back of course because I wasnt ready to let her go!! And we talked, argued but she was like just go there and we will talk about it later. So she leaves me a message the next day asking how my trip was and all of that good stuff.

 

Well, later on, she tells me she has a friend that shes kind of interested in. I said oh really? Well shes a stripper and she met this guy at her work. She said he's really sweet and he sings for her and all of this other crap. Well her and I had been doing alot of arguing and things of course were not very romantic. I had problems with her having a sugar daddy. Anyway, later on, she tells me that they are talking now and hes over there everynight and he's so into her and he's nicer to her than I ever was. Well of course that crushed me. But we pretty much talk every single day. She has two kids and she even lets me talk to them also. Well one nite, I was drinking and I said her man should write a book cuz all of the game he has and she got mad and said it wouldnt be a good idea for me not to go down there and see the kids and her. Mind you she wanted to hang out and see me. Well she told me this in her car with him right there cuz I could hear his voice. Well, I sent her a teddy bear apologizing basically and bought her some make up.

 

Well she tells me her and the new guy has met her parents and she just went down to another city to meet his. I just cant believe how fast shes moving on from me. Its like she just replaced me with this guy. I didnt call or text her all weekend until today. I text her to see if she made it back ok and she calls me. Well, I didnt see it for a few hours. Anyway, we have a bill that I need to pay and she asked if I took care of it.

 

I know this is kinda choppy and if you need more info, please let me know!! I want to know what she is doing and why? She told me that we were on two different levels, and that the new guy makes her happy and she still tells me to be good and that she loves me and tells me not to really date anyone just to do my thing.

 

I also told her congrats on her guy and that I hope they last a long time. I just dont know what to do. I mean she gives me mixed signals.

 

She called me crying one night saying that she broke my heart and she wants to work it out, she has told me that on several occasions. But Im 5 hours away so its not like I can go to her house. And now this punk is there everynight and I dont know what to do! She also tells me she has never felt the love that she has for me with anyone and that she was so convinced that we were going to be together forever. Then she proceeds to tell me we could of had alot of potential if I would just grow up and that was her advice to me. I told her I know and I was thinking alot about that and that I was working on that. I dont know if she does want to get back together and shes just frontin or wants me to make a move or what is going on? What should I do? Im so confused and heartbroken. I love this girl very much and shes my heart but I just dont know how to read her?? Can any females give me some perspective on this??

morrigan Established Member

morrigan

Posted
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She told me that we were on two different levels, and that the new guy makes her happy and she still tells me to be good and that she loves me and tells me not to really date anyone just to do my thing.

 

She was probably already emotionally (if not physically) involved with this other man when you two were still dating.

 

IMO, she plans to stay with this other guy, but just in case that relationship doesn't work out, she wants to keep a line open to you so she could get you back if she wanted to. Why tell you not to date anyone, if she doesn't want you hanging around? Basically, she wants to keep you on the back burner, a backup boyfriend. Doesn't sound like a nice thing to do, does it?

 

Then she proceeds to tell me we could of had alot of potential if I would just grow up and that was her advice to me.

 

She needs to heed some of her advice. A mature person would not tell an ex to "not really date anyone". Neither of you owes the other person anything now that your relationship has ended.

 

I love this girl very much and shes my heart but I just dont know how to read her??

 

Your ex doesn't love you as you love her, and she can't even be loving enough to fully let you go and live your own life. If you don't want to be strung along by this girl, try no contact with her--no calls, no visits. Stick to it. You live several hours away from her, so it's going to be easier for you not to run into her. Get on with your life, including meeting and dating other women.

Mary3 Established Member

Mary3

Posted
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You were out of her heart long before she gave you the * axe *. You just didnt know it though..

 

She is playing you like a well tuned fiddle and stroking you here and there while hanging out with another guy ( and we can assume they are sleeping together ) and you are waiting...waiting ...for WHAT ?

 

You are being played with. Get your own game. Get out of her life. Its sad she has the 2 kids but maybe you can pick them up on a certain day and take them to the park or Chuck E Cheese. You dont need her...but you might miss her kids.

 

Get a backbone.

 

She is holding onto you.....for later....why would you tolerate that ? Thats NOT love. You dont LOVE yourself if you allow her to USE you like a worn out kleenex tissue...

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brokenhearted24 New Member

brokenhearted24

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Wow!!! Thanx you two for the advice!! I really and absolutely appreciate it. I realize that and I believe you, Im sure she was into this guy before she gave me the axe. Why would someone treat someone else like this? Sad...but yes, Im moving on, who needs someone as selfish and heartless as that in their life? And yes, I miss the kids dearly and I do plan on taking them to Chuck E. Cheese!! lol. Thanx you two!! I would give you a real hug but since this is the internet, you get a *hug*!! :) Thanx.

suegail Established Member

suegail

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it's odd though that she's spending all this time and effort calling you and giving you every detail of how well she is doing with this new guy, letting you spend time on the phone talking to her kids. You said you talk to her "every single night." That's pretty weird, considering...

 

I guess what I'm wondering is, are you sure this guy really exists? Maybe he's more like a friend who is hanging around and she's blowing it way out of proportion. Maybe she's just dying for you to freak out or something, and come storming in to reclaim her or something else highly dramatic. What you did say was perfect in my opinion, offering her your best wishes for her future with him. Good! Perfect! Home run...

 

I'd be so curious I'd probably drop in on her and meet the guy. You might find yourself surprised and amused. It just doesn't wash as far as I'm concerned. Something seems really wrong.

 

Just my opinion. Good luck...

Mary3 Established Member

Mary3

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Congrats for seeing our posts and taking fast action !

 

If I could give you a hug back I would but since it would have to be through the monitor ...well...I guess we will just bask in your realizations that you knew were there all along and took fast action to protect your heart.

 

You are dead on in suggesting that she had this planned for awhile. You Da** right she did :)

ConfusedInOC Established Member

ConfusedInOC

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She's a stripper? I don't mean to stereotype but she's not going to settle down with any man anytime soon.....

 

You definitely don't need her. Find someone who's into YOU.

ReluctantRomeo Established Member

ReluctantRomeo

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by brokenhearted24

Well, I sent her a teddy bear apologizing basically and bought her some make up.

 

Stop kissing girls' butts when they treat you badly! You are being the textbook wuss. It demeans you. As well as diminishing your chances.

 

I'm glad you dropped this girl - she is behaving badly both towards you and towards the new guy. Suegail may be right, you may find the imaginary boyfriend vanishes now. But whatever, you are better off without her.

ConfusedInOC Established Member

ConfusedInOC

Posted
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Originally posted by ReluctantRomeo

Stop kissing girls' butts when they treat you badly! You are being the textbook wuss. It demeans you. As well as diminishing your chances.

 

Agreed. Never reward anyone who treated you badly. All it does is reinforce that behavior (I can be bad and he'll buy me a gift!")

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brokenhearted24 New Member

brokenhearted24

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Well we have been thru alot. Ive said some mean stuff and thats one of the reasons why she said she broke up with me because of the fact that she didnt get over them. I would get drunk and run my mouth and not remember much of what I said the next day. Not only that but I had a hard time with the sugar daddy thing.

 

I kind of agree with Sue but I paid off our bill and talked to her yesterday and she said her and the guy are finally an item now but shes depressed. But for the fact that he treats her good and he wines and dines her. I tried calling her today to ask her about what was going on since Im taking the kids next wknd and she hasnt answered me at all.

 

So I dont know whats going on. I told her and forwarded her (by the advice of a close friend) what was said on here, the first two postings and she was upset cuz I put her business on here. But I told her no one knows who you are, nor do they know who I am. So, Im assuming shes pissed off cuz of this. I dont know tho.

 

I guess we will see what happens!! Thanx you all for your inquiries and opinions. Its much appreciated.

ReluctantRomeo Established Member

ReluctantRomeo

Posted
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Originally posted by brokenhearted24

I would get drunk and run my mouth and not remember much of what I said the next day. Not only that but I had a hard time with the sugar daddy thing.

 

Well, looks like you've got a couple of things to work on for your next relationship :)

 

 

I guess we will see what happens!! Thanx you all for your inquiries and opinions. Its much appreciated.

 

Our pleasure! :o

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brokenhearted24 New Member

brokenhearted24

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Yea no kidding!! But it was jealousy cuz of the SD. I couldnt handle it and it took me awhile to get over that. So mental note: dont date girls with a SD!!

 

:D

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