mattelipstick Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 Red flags flying allllllllllll over the place.
katiegrl Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 (edited) After attempts of reaching him he finally said " I'm fine, I'll call you tonight" No idea what it is or what to say No worries, you won't have to. It is clear he wants out of this *relationship* and I think you should prepare yourself for that. It may happen tonight when he calls you. Just graciously let him go and move on, this so-called relationship has been over for awhile anyway .... and I think you are either in denial or projecting your own feelings of love on to him.. No man in love be would be treating you like this, no sex, ignoring you. He is fading out, and soon will end it for good. I am sorry to say that ....but please prepare yourself. Frankly, jmo from reading all your threads, he may actually have a *boyfriend* he is having sex with...or just prefers to be with. I am sure he cares about you, feels some sort of affection for you, but he is not in love with you...no matter how you want to spin this. Sorry. Edited December 12, 2015 by katiegrl
notinept Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 In any relationship, it takes TWO to say yes - but only ONE to say NO ! Healthy relationships shouldn't be this much work, if this is what he is like at only 4-months in, where the BOTH of you should be EAGER to spend lots of time together (and communicate), what would he be like after a year ? or more ? (Hint; Not better !) He's already said NO (regardless of whether either of you want to face that reality or not) ! You deserve better ! So end it and find someone who actually wants to spend time (and communicate) with you !
Author FaithInTheDark Posted December 13, 2015 Author Posted December 13, 2015 So he finally called me. He told me he's been working 15 hr days and is extremely tired. He insisted nothing's going on. I told him he just needs to tell me instead of blocking me out but insisted that's not his intention. I told him how harsh that was regardless. I explained how I'm clearly more invested then him and he said sorry. I got a lot to think about if I want to continue this relationship Maybe he is exhausted but that's no excuse
basil67 Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 I explained how I'm clearly more invested then him and he said sorry. You do realise that this is agreement from him that you're more invested than him don't you? It's not an apology for blocking you out, it's him acknowledging the imbalance. If he was sorry for not being in contact, he would have verbalised a plan for it to not happen again. I really don't see that there's much for you to think about. 2
mattelipstick Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 So he finally called me. He told me he's been working 15 hr days and is extremely tired. He insisted nothing's going on. I told him he just needs to tell me instead of blocking me out but insisted that's not his intention. I told him how harsh that was regardless. I explained how I'm clearly more invested then him and he said sorry. I got a lot to think about if I want to continue this relationship Maybe he is exhausted but that's no excuse You must REALLY just want to be able to say you have a boyfriend. 1
whichwayisup Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 So he finally called me. He told me he's been working 15 hr days and is extremely tired. He insisted nothing's going on. I told him he just needs to tell me instead of blocking me out but insisted that's not his intention. I told him how harsh that was regardless. I explained how I'm clearly more invested then him and he said sorry. I got a lot to think about if I want to continue this relationship Maybe he is exhausted but that's no excuse He isn't as invested in this as you are, that's obvious. He made NO effort to keep in touch. Nobody is that busy to send a text, an email or a quick phone call. People who want to make the effort do so! Get mad, get fed up and end it. You deserve better and you're not going to get that from him. PS You view it as a 'relationship' he views as an affair, two different things.
Gaeta Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 So he finally called me. He told me he's been working 15 hr days and is extremely tired. He insisted nothing's going on. I told him he just needs to tell me instead of blocking me out but insisted that's not his intention. I told him how harsh that was regardless. I explained how I'm clearly more invested then him and he said sorry. I got a lot to think about if I want to continue this relationship Maybe he is exhausted but that's no excuse If you want to continue?? Continue what? sex once a month and you nagging him on and on for a phone call? I prefer being single than having a boyfriend like him reminding me day after day I am just an after thought. 1
Author FaithInTheDark Posted December 13, 2015 Author Posted December 13, 2015 i think some of the comments are pretty far fetched ,,,saying he is having an affair with another man lol! saying i just really want to be able to say i have a boyfriend is pretty judgmental as well.. yikes. Yes, we do have bedroom issues, i fully admit thats a problem...and something that needs to be worked out...if it doesn't then theres no hope. he has stated its a combo of anxiety, bad head space and lack of sex drive. (these are probably excuses too)ive asked if he just doesnt want to be physical with me and he said no, its not anything to do with me. i dont think its an attraction thing since hes very affectionate besides sexual. in terms of this communication thing. yes, this is the first time hes ever neglected me like this. there is no excuse for it. over all. our relationship has been wonderful besides the sex. no one will know that because well, youre not there. so again, to say im delusional thats theres even an existing relationship is pretty extreme.... but yes, to ignore me from thursday night all the way until saturday afternoon, after me calling, texting and facebooking is just unacceptable. I dont want to talk to him until hes back from work and then talk to him face to face. who knows, if i stay with him maybe hell just ignore me again, ill set myself up for heartbreak once he leaves for work again. im sick of being mad at someone im supposed to be happy with
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