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My GF of 12 yrs broke off in Jan, met new guy in Jun, getting married in Dec!

xbronze

By xbronze
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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xbronze Member

xbronze

Posted
Posted (edited)

[Note: This is a long narrative. Sorry . If you dont have the patience for long write ups, this may not be the post for you. However, if you are patient, I would like your feedback to two questions at the end of this post, please.

 

Also all identifiable information have been changed as to not reveal anyone's information.]

 

My GF (Cathy) and I broke off this February, after being together for 12 years. In June, she entered into a relationship with a wonderful dude (I hate to admit it, but the guy is truly amazing). They got engaged in Nov, and are getting married this coming New Year's eve.

 

She is an absolutely gorgeous woman. Pretty as she is, she is just as wonderful as a person, always caring about the comfort and happiness of others. I, on the other hand, am a very ordinary, below average looking, guy.

 

Over the past 12 years I have hurt and wronged her in more ways than my pride (and embarrassment) will allow me to confess here. Suffice to say that I have pretty much checked every box / quality that defines a bad bf.

 

I cheated on her (more than once, and she eventually found out on each occasion. Despite her pain and heartache, she forgave me and gave the relationship yet another chance). For a period of time during our time together, I was simultaneously in relationships with three women (including her) and for the longest time none of the women knew that they were sharing me with two other women. Each was in a different state (state as in state within the US, not state of mind), and loved me with all their heart. I made it a point to spend quality time with each of them, best as one man could under such challenging circumstances.

 

Eventually, a man can only do so much, jet setting back and forth between three different locations, to simultaneously keep three female hearts aflame with love - for the same guy. The lies become unsustainable after a point, and the guilt of wronging three wonderful women who so selflessly gave their hearts to me, began to wear me down emotionally. I got caught.

 

Cathy (the love of my life, who is now set to marry her new guy after a brief courtship of 5 months) found out about the other two women in my life and in a very dignified manner discussed it with me. She didn't yell at me. She didn't shut me out. She told me how much pain I had caused her with my actions. She also asked me how I planned on dealing with confessing my sins to the other women (one of who never knew of the other two, the other eventually came to know of just another woman. Cathy was the only one who discovered that I had three simultaneous relationships).

 

If you think my behavior couldn't get any worse, it did. I became a bit aggressive with Cathy when we made love (intense hair pulling, spanking, name calling etc). She was very uncomfortable with the indignity of the filthy names I called her. On two occasions she teared up while requesting me to discontinue calling her such filthy names. I have no clue why I called her those names, and lesser clue as to why I never did that to any of the other two women. I just knew, and came to accept that fact that, I had three very different relationships with each of these three pretty women. But I loved Cathy the most. As a matter of fact, I only loved Cathy, and loved here dearly. Still do. And shall, to my dying breath.

 

During one of those intense degrading sex sessions I had with Cathy, she conceived. This was the first of two children we could have had. Unfortunately, we did not. It breaks my heart to this very day to think that I could have been the proud father of two lovely daughters with Cathy. It is just too painful to recount why those pregnancies didn't result in babies. The first baby was lost when she found out that I had another woman in my life, and the grief caused her to break down and cry real hard.

 

For a man who has sinned so much, the loss of what could have been my kids, really hit me hard. I actually cried out loudly, though Cathy never found out how much it hit me. Guess, as a guy I didnt want my woman to know that I had a soft side as well.

 

Just when you think that this couldnt get any worse, it did. For some reason, I got aroused about the thought of going to a sex theater (there are a few in the city that I lived in at that time). I wanted to take Cathy along. She was outraged and plainly (but politely) told me that she had had enough and that she would call off the relationship if I persisted with such perverted suggestions.

 

I backed off. However, being the pervert I was, I kept trying to get her to not just accompany me to a sex theater / sex club, but to also participate. It took time and persistence on my part, but eventually I did succeed, on two occasions. The first time, she and I just visited a sex theater. The next time, she and I attended an in house (by invite only) swinger party, and she participated (had sex with another dude and me in a closed room, with no other attendees present).

 

There are several other events and instances where I trifled with Cathy's emotions in a way that I now realize I should not have. She loved me with all her heart. Perhaps she found a nice person deep within me (despite all evidence to the contrary). I have no clue why she persisted with me for over a decade. Especially given that she is such a pretty looking woman, is highly educated and is extremely well placed professionally. She could have gotten a much better guy any day.

 

(The reason I am glossing over the other two women who I dated simultaneously, is because I had zero emotional attachment with any of the other two. Besides this posting is about Cathy's impending wedding with her new love interest)

 

Cathy did try to break up with me once. This happened when she shared her frustrations about me with a male co-worker that she confides in. He had had a crush on her for the longest time. Eventually he convinced her to dump me for all my transgressions and perversions. She agreed to and dumped me, but fortunately for me, after she went out for a couple of dinner dates with this gentlemanly co-worker, she realized that she missed me a lot! After about two months of no contact, she texted me, and we eventually got back together. Our relationship got physically even more intense.

 

(note: Out of respect for Cathy, I gave up on one of the other two women, but I couldn't bear to break the heart of the third woman. So for some time longer, I persisted with both Cathy and Jennifer. At this point, Cathy did track Jennifer down, and the two spoke. I knew that both Cathy and Jen would dump me. Surprisingly, neither did!)

 

Eventually in February of this year, I got very upset about something with Cathy (I dont even remember what caused me to get angry). But my outburst clearly hurt her. She stormed out of my house in tears. She texted me the next day. I was cordial but distant. I never contacted her again. She tried reaching out to me through texts a few times thereafter. I never responded. The last text from her was in Feb, followed by two emails in April requesting me to meet with her because she misses me a lot. She also emailed the picture of our favorite vacation getaway promising to book a weekend for us there, if only I stopped being stubborn and agreed to meet her one more time. I ignored the email.

 

This morning I received an email from her, which goes something like the one I wrote below.

 

(Note: The following email is NOT the exact same email that she sent me. I wrote the one below to give a broad idea of what her email conveyed, and yet change necessary information to protect the identities of the people involved)

 

Good morning Tim.

 

I hope you are doing fine. Though you have not responded to my emails or texts in a long time, I am reaching out to share something with you. After hoping and praying for you to marry me, and only getting my heart broken over and over again, I have decided to move on.

 

I met a wonderful man, Steve, this July. He is very caring and honest. He loves me a lot and is not afraid of commitment or marriage. He is a widower with two 5 year old twin daughters, who I have grown very fond of. The little girls adore me, and I must confess remind me of our unborn daughters that we lost. Our oldest would have been their age, had I not miscarried that evening five years ago.

 

The first time Steve introduced me to his daughters, they came running right into my arms, and I hugged them and sobbed. Steve understood, because I have shared everything about my past with him. He knows every single thing that happened between the two of us, over the past 12 years. I guess, he knew right away that in his daughters I saw the two daughters that I lost, and he comforted me.

 

Steve and I are getting married. This coming New Year's Eve. Remember, how many times I begged and pleaded with you to accompany me to my favorite beach so we could spend our weekends and holidays there, and you wouldn't. Yes, that very spot is where Steve and I are going to exchange our vows, as the sun sets on 2015, and on my 12 long years with you.

 

There are so many good things about Steve. Most of all, he adores and loves me like you never did, and like I forever wished, hoped, and prayed, you would. Tell me Tim, why was I never worthy of your love? I always believed that destiny has a plan for all of us, which would be revealed when the time is right. Except that with you, time was never right. You just could not commit to me.

 

I never understood why I was just not enough to make you happy. To keep you interested. I just have come to accept the fact that I cant force you to love me. At least not how I want you to love me.

 

After wondering and crying for 12 years, today I understand the true meaning of love. Steve, my future Husband, has shown me the true meaning of love in merely a few months. Something you failed to in 12 years. Steve is so caring and so considerate that he kept asking me time and again, if I should reconcile with you (before we got into a relationship, and were mere friends). How can I not compare him with you Tim? Had you been in a situation like Steve was, instead of trying to comfort and help a woman in emotional distress, you would have devoured her sexually.

 

Today I can understand why there was a reason behind you not loving me back. I now understand that destiny had a loving husband, Steve, planned for me. I have never before in life been so secure, so assured, so confident about anything as I am about Steve's love for me. My heart and my soul scream out that in Steve I have found my person. Whats more I get to become the Mother to two adorable girls, and possibly have many more kids, as I always wanted.

 

What more can a woman ask for, Tim? What more could I possibly want? He loves me, is very patient, understanding, he and I get along very well and cherish our time spent together. And just as importantly, he is content with me, emotionally and physically. With him I don't have to wonder if he has two, three or four other secret girlfriends hidden away across various cities. He loves me like I always wished you would love me.

 

I know that none of this is going to make any impact on your heart. I don't think you even care. You never cared about me all these years, and you don't care about me today. You possibly also blocked my number and email id, but I am writing to you anyway.

 

I hope you are happy and that you find a nice woman who can keep you happy from here on until eternity. Unfortunately, I never could, as I was never sufficient for you.

 

- Cathy

 

 

So dear Loveshack friends, please dont start with the hate mail. I accept that I have not been a great guy. I regret my actions.

 

I loved her, do love her, and shall continue to love her. Here on until eternity.

 

I dont know how to respond to this email, or if I must even respond. She clearly has found an amazing guy that I just dont measure up to. Through mutual friends I learnt that he is a very handsome gentleman, and that the two of them do make a wonderful sight to behold. (So even on the physical / attractiveness scale, justice seems to have been delivered).

 

I am reminded of the fairy tale where a princess kisses frogs before she finds her prince. Well I would fit right into this fairy tale as an ugly toad that she had to kiss before this smart dapper prince in shining armor came along.

 

I can see very clearly that this dude is cut from a superior moral fabric. And after her going through 12 years of hell with me, maybe the only good deed I could ever do for her, the woman I do love so much, is to keep myself away from the proceedings, and her life.

 

Though I lost her, I believe there is honor in losing out to a much superior man. Anyway I look at it, Steve shines through as the superior guy.

 

So my question to the Loveshack community is this:

 

1. Should I reply to this email? (Yes / No)

2. If yes, what should I write?

 

Please let me know. Thanks in advance, and thank you all for reading.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
PegNosePete Established Member

PegNosePete

Posted
Posted (edited)

Your response should be:

 

I'm truly sorry for everything I put you through.

I wish you and Steve all the happiness you deserve.

Regards,

Tim

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
  • Like 7
marky00 Established Member

marky00

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Posted (edited)

Well man...

 

Not sure why you think this Steve guy is superior. I was that Steve guy kinda and I got kicked to the curb. In the long run, a guy who offers security, love and loyalty isn't enough for a woman, as I have learned from personal experience.

 

Yes, she is probably attracted to his type right now after experiencing what she did with you. And for her own self-respect and dignity, she may very well follow through with the wedding.

 

I can understand why you don't want to reply... its hard to say how she would react. But.... that message kinda of sounds like someone who is still into you.

 

Women are better than men at making decisions with their head instead of their heart. Sounds like she has decided to finally follow her head.

 

If she loves you more than him, even superior Steve with his superior morals will come a distant second... long-term

Edited by marky00
jack237 Member

jack237

Posted
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It isnt that you dont measure up. Or that hes more handsome than you. You guys had your shot. And like you said, there were problems. Big problems.

 

You cheated on her. Once trust is broken. Everything is different. Think about it.

 

 

Someone YOU love, trust, and consider one of the most important people in your lives... OR, just an acquantaince... A co-worker, doesnt matter who... They lie to you. Straight to your face. And smile.

 

 

Would it ever be the same? Would you ever really believe them again?

 

 

Its not a question of her comparing you to him, and chosing him. Its not a competttion. Sure, he may have been what she needed in terms of the jumping off point... But the truth is she decided you werent the one. Regardless. Its you, not him.

 

 

I know its hard, but dont obsess about the new man in her life. She obviously loved you. You had your shot. It didnt work. Its a bitter pill to swallow. Trust me, Ive been right where you are. I mean... Right where you are.

 

 

Your best move would be to write her a very brief handwritten note. Wishing her the best. You will always care for her and treasure the memories you have of the times you shared. Keep it brief.

 

 

The truth is shes moved on. Shes getting married. Nothing you say now will change that. This isnt a Hollywood Romance Film where you crash the wedding and run off together.

 

 

Stay strong.

  • Like 1
Blanco Established Member

Blanco

Posted
Posted

To me, her email very much screams that she's still in a great deal of emotional duress over how you treated her during your relationship. I don't doubt she feels as elated about Steve as she details; she deserves something like this after what she endured.

 

However, that's a quick turnaround to end a 12-year relationship, meet someone, get engaged, and get married within the same calendar year. People are different, but it seems odd she would still feel it necessary to send you a lengthy email detailing all of this. She bounces between elation and sounding like a woman scorned (and rightfully so). It's too bad, because it doesn't sound like she's done a ton of healing. This man has come to her at a vulnerable time in her life. I think she's rushing it.

 

Anyway, I know that's now what you're asking about. PegNosePete's response is perfect. Given the tone of your ex's email, I suspect she either expects you to not respond or to respond angrily. A succinct acknowledgement of the email congratulating her without a hint of negative emotion is the best response.

  • Like 1
Chi townD Established Member

Chi townD

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Posted

Well dude, you screwed up and you screwed up bad. Learn from your mistakes. Just like she's going to learn. This guy is a rebound. But, she's dedicated to prove you wrong and she's going to do everything in her power to make it work.

 

 

Learn from this, girls don't like to be treated like garbage and there's only so much they will take.

 

 

That letter was nothing more than to rub your nose in it. But, maybe you can learn something from it.

 

 

Heal and move on. I seriously think you need counseling to figure out why you treated her the way you did, because that was pretty extreme.

  • Like 1
NoLeafClover Established Member

NoLeafClover

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She might be a sweetheart but she sounds like a big B++++ to me on that email. There's no reason for her to sent you that email besides try to put you down and make you feel like crap. That is passive aggressive. She can't be this angel you claim of when clearly it's written throughout her email what she is trying to do.

On the other hand you seem more concerned at the fact that she found someone better. Constantly saying he is better looking, better man etc etc. You are concerned someone else is better than you...instead of being concerned you lost someone you loved.

You had all the time to talk to her and get her back and show her how much you loved her...but you are realizing this only because there is someone else better looking and gentleman than you....

 

You know this isn't right. If you wanted 100% you would have contacted her before. Now it's not the time.

I would let her know how I felt but than wish her luck and be happy for her. I say id I'd let her know because it gives her the ego boost she is looking for and also allows you not have any regrets about not responding to her email after some time goes by.

 

Goodluck

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
SunlightJune Member

SunlightJune

Posted
Posted

You should respond to her email by apologizing for the wrongs you did in the relationship and you are happy that she found someone who could give her what you could not.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It will be a tough letter to write, but that's what you need to do. I'm honestly not sure why she even wrote you that letter, seems like its for closure though. Don't try to get her back, don't respond to her letter with any mental games trying to win her back. Just sincerely apologize and wish her well. Don't write a long drawn out letter either, keep it short and sweet, three paragraphs tops. But since you feel bad for the way you treated her, really apologize from the heart. That's all you can do at this point.

 

 

 

 

After you send her the letter, I think you need to do some inner personal digging as to why you act the way you do in relationships. I can tell you right now, the only person you're ultimately hurting is yourself when the dust has settled.

  • Like 1
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xbronze Member

xbronze

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Thank you, Sunlight. I truly appreciate your suggestions, and shall consider them.

PrettyEmily77 Established Member

PrettyEmily77

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I don't know whether this will count as a helpful reply, but in your shoes I would do nothing at all and let her get on with her life - you owe her that much, I guess.

 

 

Whether things work out or not between her and Steve is really nothing to do with you now, and don't take this the wrong way OP but no, there's no honour in treating someone so badly they'd want to leave and find a decent guy for a change (it's not a challenge or a competition, just a ton of feelings being hurt).

 

 

Also, try and bring positivity, happiness, thoughtfulness and kind consideration in your next relationship to balance the last one out.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Amelie1980 Established Member

Amelie1980

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Posted (edited)

The question is, would you be concerned about the error of your ways if she hadnt left you for it?

 

You didnt care how badly you treated her while together and it seems to me you're floundering now only because you've lost your emotional punch bag and sex slave. Who are you going to use now to put up with your c r a p? That must be hard.

 

You dont seem remorseful just annoyed that she got someone new.

Edited by Amelie1980
  • Like 2
EgoJoe Established Member

EgoJoe

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Posted

My response would be:

 

"All the best."

 

Block, delete, unfriend and get counseling.

  • Like 1
xpaperxcutx Established Member

xpaperxcutx

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Don't you write back to her.

 

 

 

 

What you did was wrong. Being with her 12 years means absolutely nothing especially since you mistreated her. I don't even know why she needed to write a letter... she obviously have some issues to work out on her own, and so do you.

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xbronze Member

xbronze

Posted
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Don't you write back to her.

 

What you did was wrong. Being with her 12 years means absolutely nothing especially since you mistreated her. I don't even know why she needed to write a letter... she obviously have some issues to work out on her own, and so do you.

 

Thank you, xpaperxcutx, for the input. If you would please not mind me asking, why do you say, 'Don't you write back to her?'

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xbronze Member

xbronze

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I don't know whether this will count as a helpful reply, but in your shoes I would do nothing at all and let her get on with her life - you owe her that much, I guess.

 

PrettyEmily77, that sure was a helpful reply. Thank you!

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xbronze Member

xbronze

Posted
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Posted
She might be a sweetheart but she sounds like a big B++++ to me on that email. There's no reason for her to sent you that email besides try to put you down and make you feel like crap. That is passive aggressive. She can't be this angel you claim of when clearly it's written throughout her email what she is trying to do.

On the other hand you seem more concerned at the fact that she found someone better. Constantly saying he is better looking, better man etc etc. You are concerned someone else is better than you...instead of being concerned you lost someone you loved.

You had all the time to talk to her and get her back and show her how much you loved her...but you are realizing this only because there is someone else better looking and gentleman than you....

 

You know this isn't right. If you wanted 100% you would have contacted her before. Now it's not the time.

I would let her know how I felt but than wish her luck and be happy for her. I say id I'd let her know because it gives her the ego boost she is looking for and also allows you not have any regrets about not responding to her email after some time goes by.

 

Goodluck

 

NoLeafClover, you offer a unique perspective that I hadn't thought of. Very balanced and unbiased. Thanks.

LivingWaterPlease Established Member

LivingWaterPlease

Posted
Posted

xbronze, I think her letter to you is honest and I think you should write her an honest one back, not to try to get back with her, but because it seems to me she needs closure to move on and the best way to get closure is to know the facts.

 

If she marries Steve, chances are she'll be happy and/or chances are she'll continue to struggle with her feelings for you.

 

I believe her best chances for happiness, Steve's best chance for happiness with her, and your best chances for a future of happiness, depend on your honesty in response to hers.

 

Imo, you should reply with a heartfelt apology for how you treated her and tell her that because you will always love her you're very happy such a wonderful person has found her and you are not surprised he's fallen in love with her. I'd tell her you realize you have many issues that need to be resolved before you're a good partner for anyone. Then I would wish her a lifetime of happiness with Steve.

 

I believe it's important that she knows you love/loved her as much as you're capable of loving any woman but that you realize you're not relationship material at this point.

 

I commend you on your kind words about her and also your compliments of Steve. You seem to have a very good and kind heart but probably have some twisted elements in your psyche that you can heal from. Were I you I would set my mind on healing and being a better person. Life passes by quickly and you want to begin creating a life you can look back on with pride and satisfaction that you came to a point where you determined to treat others the way you'd want to be treated.

 

Wishing you a life of health and love!

  • Like 1
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xbronze Member

xbronze

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Such an amazing incisive response, LivingWaterPlease. I wont lie, it caused me to tear up some.

 

Yours is the first response that stated anything remotely positive about me. Not sure if I am worthy of the compliments, but I very humbly accept your kind words.

 

Thank you.

  • Like 1
makemineamac Established Member

makemineamac

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Well I think you recognize your shortcomings, not sure you're deserving of compliments though for anything you've done. 'Saying' what you'r'e saying now is just that. You're just talking. It's really easy to do after the fact.

 

Your previous 'actions' on the other hand were a reality, and in the end let your relationship play out for what it really was; an abusive, disrespectful environment for this woman you love so much, AND at least two other women. You have some major work to do to prevent you from hurting more people out there going forward.

 

This letter doesn't really ring true to me either. It just seems too specific. Maybe 'Steve' really isn't that great, but hey, let's not kid ourselves - he's got to be better than you in your current state, so I doubt she's looking for reconciliation, it really might be a closure piece, I don't know.

 

In any case, should you choose to respond I agree with all, a heartfelt apology, you say you were not a worthy partner, and you wish her all the best.

 

The bigger issue here is of course how you treated all these women. And simply saying that you didn't really care about one of the 3 is very telling. She meant nothing to you. Ugh,

 

What are you going to do to become healthy and well? Unless you really don't feel at all and these are all just words.

 

I've said this on other threads because I've been a liar like you in the past and I did a lot of work to end that behaviour in myself, and hopefully you can put the effort into becoming a full, honest and committed partner in your next relationship. It's easier to lie and hide this stuff, but it's always there. Always.

 

I wish you well on your quest and hope you will keep us updated.

LivingWaterPlease Established Member

LivingWaterPlease

Posted
Posted (edited)
Such an amazing incisive response, LivingWaterPlease. I wont lie, it caused me to tear up some.

 

Yours is the first response that stated anything remotely positive about me. Not sure if I am worthy of the compliments, but I very humbly accept your kind words.

 

Thank you.

 

xbronze, :) you are worth a whole lot to God! He wants you to have a wonderful life and also to help others have a great life, too!

 

I have made many big mistakes, too, most people have, but God has truly helped me grow and change into a person I like better than the one I used to be! He is amazing in His ability to take a broken life and turn it into a golden one!:):):)

 

PS, Just want to add, I don't understand the posts that pile on you (and some others on LS). You freely admitted your guilt and your regret about it. Not sure why others try to rub it in as if you didn't know you'd made mistakes. To me, you are here trying to learn how to do better. I respect that and believe it serves no purpose to criticize you. If you hadn't realized your mistakes, then yes, it would be good to have them pointed out. But the harshness from some of the posters seems pointless to me. I think sometimes people feel bad about themselves and it makes them feel superior to pile on someone else.

Edited by LivingWaterPlease
mightycpa Established Member

mightycpa

Posted
Posted

I'm not really impressed with either one of you. So Cathy is the kind of girl who has so little respect for herself that she can forgive multiple instances of cheating. You have so little respect for her and the other women that you'll bang whoever, whenever. And now that your lollipop has been taken away, you're all broken up about it.

 

Here's how I see this playing out:

 

She's going to marry this poor sucker, and things will be good for a while, maybe even great in fact, until the drudgery of real life sets in. That's when they're going to figure out whether what they have is real or not, and judging from the language in that email, she's going to be thinking about you for a long time. Not in the sense that she'd ever get back with you, but more like why can't she shake these feelings for you.

 

You, you've got your head up your ass so far that you can't tell what you really want. You lived the life you really want, but it's hard to keep people around when part of what you want is to betray and abuse them. It's also hard to admit that yeah, you were a dick, but you loved pretty much every minute of it. I'll bet that deep down inside, the big problem is that you lost that life you had... not that you lost her. Don't get me wrong - she's quite a find. I mean, where do you get a girl that will put up with that **** you did? Most won't, and in that sense, shes valuable to you. You had both continuity and steadiness on the one hand, and fresh and exciting on the other.

 

I'm sure you loved the excitement of the new women, and the variety provided by having three women sexually. It's a powerful feeling. I'm also sure that if you hadn't pushed her over the edge, you'd still be enjoying life as it was. For you, I predict that within a year or so, you'll be just fine. You'll bury your unresolved feelings for this woman, and start living that life you had, except that someone else will be in the picture. You won't like her nearly as much, but she'll do, and you'll work out your freaky side with other people. You've still got some unhappiness to work out of your system, and maybe one day you'll figure out that you feel best when you're not exclusive.

 

Sometime later in your life, you may miss her again, but you'll realize that everything happened for the best, even though it will still hurt. Her marriage may survive, it may not. That she can marry so quickly shows where her priorities are. She wants the trappings of love, but maybe she got lucky and found real love too.

 

Anyway, it's quite a story. I don't envy either of you.

  • Like 1
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xbronze Member

xbronze

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Wow, MightyCPA, what a unique perspective you have shared here. It was difficult for me to go through some of it, I will admit that. Nonetheless, what unique insight you offer.

 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

AT15 Established Member

AT15

Posted
Posted (edited)

Well, I don't know what to say.

 

It seems to me that you were getting some type of unique energy/attention/love from her. Did she have a nurturing mommy quality to her?

 

Anyhow, I don't think you loved her. I think you loved the unrequited love she gave you. That is what you REALLY loved and that is what you will miss.

 

Do I think you will find another like her? No.

 

I am happy she never had any daughters by you. Because the abuse that they would have witnessed would have damaged them for life. Men who treat women like that, set their daughters up to get the same treatment by a man just like their father. So...yeah.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
language ~T
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xbronze Member

xbronze

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Thank you, AT15, for sharing your viewpoint.

EgoJoe Established Member

EgoJoe

Posted
Posted

OP,

 

Are you ashamed of your actions?

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