Zippy2000 Posted December 8, 2015 Posted December 8, 2015 You ll say that now but give it time when you leave it too late to find a man you all be back on this site. Oddly most people want to be in relationships on Love shack and want help and guidance which makes your thread quite odd how you want to be the complete opposite. I can understand why some people on here reacted the way they did yo your thread.
Timshel Posted December 8, 2015 Posted December 8, 2015 For two whole years, but I'm not used to it at all. Guess it's because of how I'm raised huh. Never been in a relationship before, and none of the guys in high school and college even so much as glanced at me. I was perfectly happy with it. I am losing sleep over it. And it's affecting my studies and my peace of mind. I can't ask my parents about it because they will be mad at me. They don't want me to boyfriend. And no, can't secretly date even if I wanted to. If I ask my friends they will just push me to get a boyfriend. In fact they're doing that now. None of them are single. I will learn to do just that. It seems I lack grace under pressure. I'll make it my New Years resolution to correct that. THANK YOU FOR TAKING ME SERIOUSLY. Ok, relax. Take a breath. If you don't want to date, you don't have to. Focusing on your studies is a perfectly fine choice for this time in your life if doing so and dating will be overwhelming. Ya know, guys will ask and there isn't anything wrong with genuine interest. To accept or decline is your prerogative and there is no law that a woman (or man) must entertain any invitation. If a person would suggest that you are being unkind for not giving an opportunity when you, for whatever reason choose not to.....then they are being unreasonable. Your dilemma may fall into the category of not feeling comfortable with saying no. Saying no in a firm way, without angst or annoyance is a good skill to learn for many situations in life and will greatly decrease your stress levels. Practice makes perfect and over time can be done with such ease that neither party will bat an eyelash of feel uncomfortable. Like many things in life, it's only a big deal if you make it one. 1
carhill Posted December 8, 2015 Posted December 8, 2015 While perfectly valid to not desire male attention, I'll point to a near century old saying attributed to playwright Walter Minzer which can help with the process: Be nice to those you meet on the way up because you will meet them on the way down As a young, attractive, post-grad student, you're on your way up in sexual and social power. You'll interact with a lot of people in your life. How you choose to interact with them forms both your style of interaction as well as perceptions of that interaction. Yep, sure, people are interchangeable and replaceable; however, your style becomes a part of you and your aura in the world and will be with you for life. Good luck! 2
Karine26 Posted December 8, 2015 Posted December 8, 2015 Start acting interested back. The challenge will be over and they'll quickly move on to the next "target" lol Kidding!! Kinda...
winny Posted December 8, 2015 Posted December 8, 2015 tell them you're a lesbian. no tell them u r asexual
RedRobin Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 I work around all men, so it has presented professional challenges for me my entire adult life. Not just talking about sexual harassment... I am talking about needing to work with men and interact just like anyone else does. You need to learn how to navigate and not get flustered. I can sympathize. I am also here to tell you that, if you take care if yourself and maintain a pleasant personality... There will be many men who come your way. The scarcity mentality is only pitched to women, if you notice... Not men. Don't let it get to you. But I digress... Here's what you do. Don't change a damn thing about yourself. Wear makeup if you feel like it. Or don't wear it. Cut off all your hair and dye it hot pink if you feel like it... Thing is, if they are attracted to you, it's their problem not yours. Don't make it your problem. If a guy flirts, act like he is kidding. Laugh and make a joke about it. If he persists, then smile and say, no thanks. If he persists after that, you find a way to casually insult his manhood in front of others. That works like a charm. You will find that the other men who are watching will get the hint and won't eff with you. 1
Redfisher Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 But I digress... Here's what you do. Don't change a damn thing about yourself. Wear makeup if you feel like it. Or don't wear it. Cut off all your hair and dye it hot pink if you feel like it... Thing is, if they are attracted to you, it's their problem not yours. Don't make it your problem. Best advice... 1
LookAtThisPOst Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 (edited) How do I stop guys from becoming interested in me? I'm a post grad student. I have a career goal in sights. I am very busy, and will never be interested in any guy and in being in a relationship altogether. I thought I'd already made myself clear on the matter. But nooo, that doesn't stop them from showing interest. Frankly, I find all the attention annoying, and I wish they'd all just not notice me and, God please, leave me alone. This post is actually quite attention seeking in itself If this IS true, as you claim...your'e going to miss out. In fact, college is probably the ONLY place in your LIFEtime where you'll have opportunities to meet a ton of men. Once you hit that podium and get your degree...say good-bye to that. So why do that to yourself? Usually any woman, while I was in college, who said that to me...was full of crap anyhow...as I would see her a month later with a study buddy turned boyfriend. lol I might have to someday, if it goes on. I hope it does not come to that because I like them very much back, but just not enough to pursue a relationship. And here's the caveat...You gave yourself away. You're not interested nor attractive enough to these men to throw out your "no dating while in college" rule. Guaranteed if one DOES come along that is JUST enough attractive TO you...then, "Oh, wait, I think I can squeeze in a dinner during a study break with that hunk of a man that asked me out in the computer lab!" THIS is the part where I don't take you Seriously! Edited December 9, 2015 by LookAtThisPOst
LookAtThisPOst Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 Since polite hasn't worked, try rude. Just ignore them but beware by rejecting all these potential suitors now there may come a time when there are no suitors & you will have blown your changes. Yep...and college is a time in your life when your challenges are the greatest! I've seen ton of relationships and even marriages come of people who met in college. Some even nicely time their weddings a few months after their graduation. Once you leave the college life, and you've kept rejecting suitors time and time again...well, once you leave that campus, that's where the real challenge starts and you're stuck online dating. LOL
loveweary11 Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 How do I stop guys from becoming interested in me? I'm a post grad student. I have a career goal in sights. I am very busy, and will never be interested in any guy and in being in a relationship altogether. I thought I'd already made myself clear on the matter. But nooo, that doesn't stop them from showing interest. Frankly, I find all the attention annoying, and I wish they'd all just not notice me and, God please, leave me alone. Simple: Get ugly. Wear hideous glasses Loose, baggy, saggy clothing Put no makeup on Don't do your hair. My ex used to take this approach to try to keep guys away in public sometimes. It works. 1
Heatherknows Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 How do I stop guys from becoming interested in me? I'm a post grad student. I have a career goal in sights. I am very busy, and will never be interested in any guy and in being in a relationship altogether. I thought I'd already made myself clear on the matter. But nooo, that doesn't stop them from showing interest. Frankly, I find all the attention annoying, and I wish they'd all just not notice me and, God please, leave me alone. Tell them you have Leprosy and then pick your nose.
Heatherknows Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 Have a bath in crap and shave your head, jeez who knows? Tell them you aren't interested and keep doing that. It isn't exactly a life threatening issue! **Samhain wins the award for best solution.***
Maggie4 Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 If you can't even handle classmates, you'll have problems down the road. You are ambitious? Then think of this as part of your career training. As a career woman, you will have to know how to handle male attention properly. 2
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