Is this right?

[Beepeear]

Hey everyone,

First of let me inform you all I have OCD which may explain some things in this description, thanks

 

 

Me and my girlfriend have been together for almost 5 months now (2 days away) and in the first few months everything was fine, yeah we had one or two tough times but apart from that, we were fine. She is everything I was looking for, she's sweet, kind and beautiful. However lately I've been feeling kind of different, we had a really tough time the last week or so, with her breaking up with me a few times and just filled with bitter arguments and what not, and that really stressed up both out but we got back together and when we did, I was really happy, I wanted that. However lately I have been suffering with HOCD and you don't understand how confusing that can be when you know you want your girlfriend but your mind is trying to convince you that you're gay. so during that time I was so stressed out, couldn't think straight, didn't get excited about seeing my girlfiend and now it seems to have carried over into my relationship

 

Let me explain, me and my girlfriend used to go on dates when we first met like go to the cinema, go shopping etc. And now we don't do it as much, we go shopping from time to time and I took her out for her birthday meal the other day and it was really fun, but other than that she either comes to my house or I go to hers, which I think may be the problem, I may be bored, because I know what exactly is going to happen when I'm with her at our houses, it just doesn't seem as...exciting anymore. We have discussed a lot and invested a lot of thought into our future, marriage, housing even children and I know it's not s long time to discuss it but, it felt right at the time, but when I think of it now, I don't feel as, excited. I love my girlfriend, I can't imagine my life without her she helps me so much, with my anxieties and my OCD and although she can cause them sometimes, she does help. It upsets me thinking of when we first met and when we first dated because back then I didn't have to worry about this. I could feel my feelings. And it's scaring me that maybe it's going to force me to end it.

 

I'm also finding it hard to get excited about other things in my life such as Christmas, last week or so I was so excited as I'm getting a new dog and now when I think of it, just, nothing, I feel nothing. Do you think I should let her go? I don't want to see her with someone else as it would break me but, if it's best for her I'll do it, I'm really scared I never thought I'd let my mental illnesses control the feelings I have for my girlfriend. Am I just stressed/anxious? Or is it something deeper like me falling out of love?

 

Thank you for reading

[MJJean]

The purpose to dating is to determine if you're a good long term match. If, at only 5 months, you're getting bored and are unexcited it could be the limerence phase ending and you're coming to realize that you and your GF might not be a good long term match.

 

You could try varying the routine and see if that reignites the excitement.

 

Are you in treatment for your mental illnesses? Are you on medication and/or seeing a psychiatrist/psychologist? If so, do you think the med(s) are working properly or need to be adjusted?

 

Also, have you been evaluated for Seasonal Affective Disorder? People with SAD tend to struggle during the winter.

[TexasMan68]

Maybe your just gay and not suffering from whatever acronym the medical world would like to sell the public a pill for. Too much time watching porn can also bring on those feelings as well. I suffer from a severe case of GLAD at this time of year and thank GOD for it every day!!!

[Scarlett.O'hara]

I think you need to be single and explore your sexuality. This relationship has become too serious, too quickly. You sound very stressed and confused, and obviously have a lot of things going on in your head right now. You might find some counselling helpful.