Dating double standard for rich or famous...

[bohica]

I am not sure if I am in the right section. This post is more of a discussion.

 

I know this guy who is a professional athlete. He is a good looking guy and also successful outside of his sport. He has his masters degree and plans on getting his doctorate after his sports career ends. He is also a charitable person with his time. To top things off he drives a very expensive exotic car.

 

He dates a lot of women. Beautiful women. He's in his thirties so he's not a young kid. The kicker is that he lives at home with his parents. When he's asked about it he just says he and his family are close. He loves the attention he gets and is a bit charismatic but he isn't even a very fun guy. He's kind of bland. Fanatic about his diet and rest.

 

I'm a smart guy. I'm good looking and I am fairly successful but If I were living at home I wouldn't be able to date. Most women don't want a grown man who lives at home. I find it hard enough to find someone interested in me. Surely, he has a lot going for him but I can't help thinking this guy lives at home and dates beautiful women but if I told a women I live at home it would be a huge turn off.

Edited December 7, 2015 by bohica

[Toodaloo]

Hate to point it out to you but he is hardly happily married with 2.4 children is he...

 

Don't judge yourself on anothers life.

[BluEyeL]

He's probably very hot. You're probably not. That's the reality. Very good looking people get passes that the rest of us don't. there is no point in complaining about it, it can't be changed.

[PegNosePete]

if I told a women I live at home it would be a huge turn off.

Why's that a double standard? He is rich and famous. If you were rich and famous you could date beautiful women, whether you lived with your parents or not.

 

Women like to date rich and famous guys. Just as men like to date beautiful women. Where is the double standard?

[oldshirt]

Much yet you have to learn my young padawan.

 

 

Rich, handsome, educated, philanthropic and of pleasant demeanor will greatly compensate for living at home.

 

 

Depending on the house and the neighborhood and the family's lifestyle, living with parents may not be even be a negative point at all. Some may even appreciate it and think it is a positive thing.

 

 

It all depends on all of the variables. If you are working class or less family, live in tiny ranch house in the hood and you are living with your parents because you can't afford your own pad and your bedroom is right beside your parent's bedroom, yeah, you aren't going to be impressing any chicks, period.

 

 

But if you have a solid education, a good career and excellent career potential and your family lives in an upscale community in a large enough house that you can come and go as you please with nobody noticing or even caring, then it can be a nonissue at worst and perhaps even a benefit.

 

 

If your family is upper class and has pools and hot tubs and game rooms and host an active and entertaining lifestyle, it can definitely be a big plus.

 

 

If your family is in a shack in the hood and your dad is sitting drunk in the chair in only his underwear watching football and your mom is on the couch bitching our your old man while she's clipping her toenails when your GF comes over, she's not going to want to sign up for that.

 

 

It's all about lifestyle. does your family have a lifestyle that chicks are going to want to join into and be a part of? Or are they going to run for the hills?

 

 

If your house is a tiny shack in the hood and your family is a bunch of drunk, inbred rednecks that fight and bitch all the time, you are absolutely better off getting away and getting your own place.

 

 

But if your family home is the place where people want to be and people gather to be part of the in-crowd, then it can actually help.

[oldshirt]

.... and it's not really a double standard. High status and popularity and good looks and monetary resources IS the standard. Anything that shows you are of high status and popularity and resources is a plus.

 

 

If you come from that environment, then remaining in that environment can be a plus.

 

 

But if you come from an environment of low status and low popularity and poverty and dysfunction, then you are better off getting away from that environment and striving for higher status on your own.

[bohica]

He's probably very hot. You're probably not. That's the reality. Very good looking people get passes that the rest of us don't. there is no point in complaining about it, it can't be changed.

 

 

Haha.... I'm considered to be a good looking guy. I'm also not complaining here. This isn't about me. I am using myself as an example.

 

This is my curiosity here. I'm not complaining.

I am also not naive. I understand some women like rich, handsome men with a lot to offer them. He doesn't come from a rich upper class family either.

 

Maybe this seems like a dumb post to some. Don't bash me. It's just a discussion.

 

A double standard is a standard or principle that is unfairly applied in different ways to different people or groups. I am a successful, good looking guy. I am intelligent, educated and cultured. If I lived at home with my mother (middle class) it would be a turn off for most women. There lies the double standard.

Edited December 7, 2015 by bohica

[Versacehottie]

I am not sure if I am in the right section. This post is more of a discussion.

 

I know this guy who is a professional athlete. He is a good looking guy and also successful outside of his sport. He has his masters degree and plans on getting his doctorate after his sports career ends. He is also a charitable person with his time. To top things off he drives a very expensive exotic car.

 

He dates a lot of women. Beautiful women. He's in his thirties so he's not a young kid. The kicker is that he lives at home with his parents. When he's asked about it he just says he and his family are close. He loves the attention he gets and is a bit charismatic but he isn't even a very fun guy. He's kind of bland. Fanatic about his diet and rest.

 

I'm a smart guy. I'm good looking and I am fairly successful but If I were living at home I wouldn't be able to date. Most women don't want a grown man who lives at home. I find it hard enough to find someone interested in me. Surely, he has a lot going for him but I can't help thinking this guy lives at home and dates beautiful women but if I told a women I live at home it would be a huge turn off.

 

Well, ok about living at home with his parents. In his case, it has a reason: he probably travels all the time for his work AND it is a clear cut case of NOT HAVING to since everyone knows he could afford not to: therefore he is not a loser. And it becomes endearing because you know he cares for and gets along with his family. If you, a more normal guy, lived at home. It would send up red flags. There wouldn't be the counterbalance of the glamourous lifestyle or things that offset living at home represents for a normal guy. Basically it would present you as not ambitious, not motivated, a loser, cheap or possibly even weird. My good friend's family is very well off. Like father, like son, her older brother was a millionaire himself by mid-20s's. It's now getting into his mid-30's and he STILL lives at home! He is also a good looking guy. He's weird though and I think a miser--hence the living at home. He has had no significant gfs. I think it's because he's weird. Maybe highly functioning aspbergers. He's super smart, socialable enough but still no gf. He's not gay. I'm not sure how hard he has tried to get a gf though.

 

And yes the rest he is getting a pass on because he is good-looking, in shape, famous and well-off in spite of being a bit boring and bland. Did you see the Pete Berg/HBO special on athletes after their career ends? Get back to me a few years if your friend doesn't make good on the doctorate etc or nail down another career. You may find yourself way ahead--provided he doesn't have good sense with his money, choice of wife or isn't mentally incapacitated by the end of a professional sports career. Hope that's not the case since he's your friend and does charitable things--plus it is very impressive to take his education that far when he didn't have to

[Myragal]

Why do you believe we women do not want a grown man who lives at home?

 

We don't want an immature man who lives at home. A man who lives at home because he lacks financial stability, education, confidence, etc.

 

It would never bother me if a man lived at home due to positive choices to do so. Single males live at home in 95% of the world.

 

There's also an issue with YOUR confidence and perspective. I adore a man who is fit and aware of his diet. I'd sure pick that over a pasty guy who dines on pizza andpotato chips. The only professional athlete ( a football player))I knew got there was because he was responsible, self disciplined, dedicated and had to maintain good marks to keep his scholarship.

Edited December 7, 2015 by Myragal

[Buddhist]

I know this guy who is a professional athlete. He is a good looking guy and also successful outside of his sport. He has his masters degree and plans on getting his doctorate after his sports career ends. He is also a charitable person with his time. To top things off he drives a very expensive exotic car.

 

He dates a lot of women. Beautiful women. He's in his thirties so he's not a young kid. The kicker is that he lives at home with his parents. When he's asked about it he just says he and his family are close. He loves the attention he gets and is a bit charismatic but he isn't even a very fun guy. He's kind of bland. Fanatic about his diet and rest.

 

So he's very fit obviously because he's an athlete, he's successful and according to you intelligent and good looking. Yep it's a no brainer why he dates lot of beautiful women.

 

I'm a smart guy. I'm good looking and I am fairly successful but If I were living at home I wouldn't be able to date.

 

Then you're not as good looking, fit or as successful as him are you? The numbers don't lie.

 

Bottom line - highly attractive people get dates. If you're not getting dates on the same terms, then you're not one of them. Sorry to break it to you. There's no conspiracy out there and double standards. You just aren't as attractive as you think you are.

[Qboro90]

I am not sure if I am in the right section. This post is more of a discussion.

 

I know this guy who is a professional athlete. He is a good looking guy and also successful outside of his sport. He has his masters degree and plans on getting his doctorate after his sports career ends. He is also a charitable person with his time. To top things off he drives a very expensive exotic car.

 

He dates a lot of women. Beautiful women. He's in his thirties so he's not a young kid. The kicker is that he lives at home with his parents. When he's asked about it he just says he and his family are close. He loves the attention he gets and is a bit charismatic but he isn't even a very fun guy. He's kind of bland. Fanatic about his diet and rest.

 

I'm a smart guy. I'm good looking and I am fairly successful but If I were living at home I wouldn't be able to date. Most women don't want a grown man who lives at home. I find it hard enough to find someone interested in me. Surely, he has a lot going for him but I can't help thinking this guy lives at home and dates beautiful women but if I told a women I live at home it would be a huge turn off.

 

 

 

That's not a double standard. The reason living with your parents into your 30s is looked down upon and viewed negatively is because it generally implies that you're not going anywhere with your life, don't have a career, can't afford your own place, and are stuck living in a place where it's free.

 

This athlete can live at home and get away with it because the women he dates know that he's successful, driven, has goals he goes after and achieves, and has a boatload of money. Do you know if he paid off his parents mortgage and that's why he lives with them? Professional athletes travel a majority of the time so the houses they own/rent, very often remain unoccupied during the season/training. Perhaps he was raised not to waste money. Why pay for a house that he only is going to stay at for 2-3 months a year and pay for it as if you're there 365 days a year? He can stay with his folks, not worry about anything and not waste the money.

 

Also, in that industry people can be traded or change teams very suddenly. Perhaps he didn't want to be burdened with a house that he knew he'd eventually have to sell in the event he changed cities or teams. Food for thought .