Redfisher Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Hey, Not looking for advice so to speak but I would like to hear from the ladies about if they had control over where and how a guy would say I love you for the first time...Not that one does of course but what would be your dream scenario? Details are great, Thanks.
Redhead14 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Hey, Not looking for advice so to speak but I would like to hear from the ladies about if they had control over where and how a guy would say I love you for the first time...Not that one does of course but what would be your dream scenario? Details are great, Thanks. I would not want to have control over that. I would want it to be completely spontaneous and heartfelt and it would not matter when or where it happened. My fiance, who passed away, said it to me one night in bed as I was falling asleep. He simply got very close to hold me, brushed my hair with his hand, and said "I love you, good night". I was stunned and never fell asleep 7
kismetkismet Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 I think I'd generally prefer the first time to be almost more.. low key. Not something that was planned, just suddenly they realize it and have to say it, or they've known for a while and can't keep it in anymore because something that's just happened between you two makes you feel the need. Like even just sitting on the couch watching a show and she does something really sweet or nuzzles in for a cuddle and then it comes spilling out. I think it feels more genuine that way. 1
Redhead14 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 (edited) I would not want to have control over that. I would want it to be completely spontaneous and heartfelt and it would not matter when or where it happened. My fiance, who passed away, said it to me one night in bed as I was falling asleep. He simply got very close to hold me, brushed my hair with his hand, and said "I love you, good night". I was stunned and never fell asleep My ex husband said it in the car while we were going to a concert in the city when, what became our song, came on the radio -- "I love you just the way you are". And, my current SO said it while we were working in his garden. He asked me to hand him a trowel and he said "you know, I love you" and kept working. Edited December 4, 2015 by Redhead14 2
Author Redfisher Posted December 4, 2015 Author Posted December 4, 2015 Thanks for responding....I like other peoples story's and details it helps me to see things better. To be honest I think I'm going to tell my girlfriend this weekend I love her! Its only been 7 weeks but we are together every day and I do feel a lot for her. She's just coming back from a packers game in Detroit to spend the weekend at my place.I have lots of great food and snacks and I'm going to make it a nice weekend but Man I'm nervous.....Im a dork. 2
MidwestUSA Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 It popped it of my husband's mouth in a parking lot where I had locked my keys in the car with it running. It was 106F out; probably higher on the asphalt. It was 26 days after our first date, and he moved in at seven weeks. You can't possibly be a bigger dork than he is! Good luck! 4
Author Redfisher Posted December 4, 2015 Author Posted December 4, 2015 It popped it of my husband's mouth in a parking lot where I had locked my keys in the car with it running. It was 106F out; probably higher on the asphalt. It was 26 days after our first date, and he moved in at seven weeks. You can't possibly be a bigger dork than he is! Good luck! Thats a great story..Love it! 1
jen1447 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Not sure about ideal situations but I can tell you a lot of awkward ones.
Ic1 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 I would not want to have control over that. I would want it to be completely spontaneous and heartfelt and it would not matter when or where it happened. Makes me think of me telling my girlfriend I love her for the first time. W had talked the previous week about how we wanted to take it slow so we could get the most from it, and make it most likely to last. But that weekend I wanted to tell her so many times, I re-phrased it each time to things like "I think you're beautiful". She was doing the same, even bring the word 'love' into it by saying "I love it when you hold me." That night falling asleep next to her, I told her in an alternative way to say good night. She told me she knew what I meant, which caught my attention and I told her I wanted to say it, so she reminded me of our conversation and knew why I had been biting my tongue. We were doing it because we cared. I gave her a squeeze in my holding her, and told her of my affection in words again while fighting to stay awake. She tells me "YOU JUST SAID IT! I love you too!" I'm suddenly awake due to this accusation, and I believe it because of my sleepy condition. So I say it again in complete awareness, and kiss her. Best mistake I've made in that relationship. 1
Author Redfisher Posted December 4, 2015 Author Posted December 4, 2015 Not sure about ideal situations but I can tell you a lot of awkward ones. Interested.... 1
GorillaTheater Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Best for a guy never to say it. It never helps. Disagree. I think that the man should lead the relationship, as old-fashioned as that likely sounds, and that includes leading the relationship to a new level if what the man feels is in fact love and not mere infatuation or an attempt to get in her pants. Frankly Redfisher, I'm a little concerned that saying this after just 7 weeks is a little soon, though. But you're no kid, and you know your relationship and how receptive she's likely to be. There's no leadership without risk. 2
jen1447 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Interested.... No real great stories, just stuff like oddly timed pledges of love (2nd date or first time in the sack etc.), a couple guys who I'd never even actually gone out with, and funnily one guy who was kissing my ass. (Like he was talking to my ass.) I actually thought that one was cute.
Redhead14 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Thanks for responding....I like other peoples story's and details it helps me to see things better. To be honest I think I'm going to tell my girlfriend this weekend I love her! Its only been 7 weeks but we are together every day and I do feel a lot for her. She's just coming back from a packers game in Detroit to spend the weekend at my place.I have lots of great food and snacks and I'm going to make it a nice weekend but Man I'm nervous.....Im a dork. Man I'm nervous.....Im a dork. -- Son . . . you missed the point of our responses -- spontaneous, unforced, unplanned, relaxed . . . You are putting pressure on yourself. Don't do it this weekend (unless, of course, it simply happens naturally by coincidence). 1
Ic1 Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 Don't do it this weekend (unless, of course, it simply happens naturally by coincidence). Agreed. Unplanned is the best time, because it'll happen when you know you're both feeling it. So you'll naturally want to say it. *Of course some try to say it ASAP because they don't know what the feeling is.
Rejected Rosebud Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 I have lots of great food and snacks and I'm going to make it a nice weekend but Man I'm nervous.....Im a dork. You sound like an awesome boyfriend! Go for it!! :bunny: 1
Versacehottie Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 Thanks for responding....I like other peoples story's and details it helps me to see things better. To be honest I think I'm going to tell my girlfriend this weekend I love her! Its only been 7 weeks but we are together every day and I do feel a lot for her. She's just coming back from a packers game in Detroit to spend the weekend at my place.I have lots of great food and snacks and I'm going to make it a nice weekend but Man I'm nervous.....Im a dork. Well with what you have planned it sounds like you mean to say it in a romantic setting and moment. A lot of the examples given, it seemed to just pop out spontaneously (which was also my favorite time) although I wouldn't mind the more formal and direct way you sound like you are headed toward. They are both good! I think whatever fits your personality, your personality as a couple and makes it the most sincere moment is great!! I happened to prefer the spontaneous thing because that is so me, as well as the guy who said it. I think I have posted about it on here before but we were in middle of big loud group dinner at a restaurant, having lots of fun with all of his friends. In middle of the whole thing, he stared at me for the tiniest bit, then whispered in my ear that he loved me--it was super quick but like our little secret. Because of being in middle of all that noise and dinner, he didn't really put me in a position to say it back to him which was perfect. Not that I didn't feel the same. But it's like he just said it of his own accord, not needing my response and assurance that I felt the same. Also, to me, I felt like a big part of why it came up that night was because he liked how I fit in with his friends and how friendly, social I am which, I think, if a person seems like they "get" you, who you believe you are, and that's the tipping point that brings out the I love you, it's amazing. Good luck this weekend. 1
Author Redfisher Posted December 5, 2015 Author Posted December 5, 2015 Man I'm nervous.....Im a dork. -- Son . . . you missed the point of our responses -- spontaneous, unforced, unplanned, relaxed . . . You are putting pressure on yourself. Don't do it this weekend (unless, of course, it simply happens naturally by coincidence). I get your point, Thanks. it all helps.
d0nnivain Posted December 5, 2015 Posted December 5, 2015 DH & I have one of the funniest & grosses ILY stories. We were on a road trip with my friends, who he had just met. He & I were asleep in the back seat. All of a sudden he wakes up & yawns only it was a true Technicolor Yawn all over me, the back seat & the back of my friends' heads in the front. The smell was horrific. The driver pulled off at the next exit off the interstate & I scrambled out of the car because the smell was making me nauseous. As I was sprinting across the parking lot of the truck stop toward the rest room, I used the throw away line "I love you but I gotta get away from you right now." I felt bad that I was leaving him with people he'd only known for 48 hours but yuck. I didn't want to hurl too. I was about 50 yards away when I heard this plaintive "I love you too!" I stopped dead in my tracks, turned around & stared at him incredulously. He looked like a kicked puppy but sheepishly said "I really do." I burst out laughing then ran to the ladies' room. 2
Author Redfisher Posted December 9, 2015 Author Posted December 9, 2015 Thanks guys, Well I did it! waited till just yesterday. I ended up making a card with a huge heart on it and inside I wrote "I Love You!" and put it on her pillow at My place. She loved it and said she has been wanting to tell me she loved me for a week but was chicken... She says that card is the nicest thing ever and wants to keep it forever. Sometimes simple is really the best, We have a long way to go but now we are on the same page. 4
Versacehottie Posted December 9, 2015 Posted December 9, 2015 Oh, happy for you Redfisher! I was in suspense waiting to hear your update so super glad you gave us one---and that it was a success for you!!! 1
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