Carly18 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Hi! I am young but not so much, I am 18 and my boyfriend is 21. I love him but I think I love him more than he loves me and he is taking advantage of that. For example, now he is in holidays and he is living at the beach with his family. He said he will visit me but it was a lie and now he is expecting me to visit him all the weekends and the trip is almost 3 hours. He pays for the tickets and everything but he is unable to do the same trip for me. And the most painful is that if I do not visit him we will not see each other. He also wants me to lie to my dad so I can visit him more. I do not know what to do because I feel stupid for doing all that he wants but I do not do it then I feel even more miserable. Please, give me an advice.
Samhain Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Tell him he either visits you as he said he would, or you are not going to see him. It may hurt you but if you let him control you from the start, it will get worse over time. And don't lie to your dad, he will be the one person who would crawl through broken glass to help you.. This guy wouldn't.
Redhead14 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Hi! I am young but not so much, I am 18 and my boyfriend is 21. I love him but I think I love him more than he loves me and he is taking advantage of that. For example, now he is in holidays and he is living at the beach with his family. He said he will visit me but it was a lie and now he is expecting me to visit him all the weekends and the trip is almost 3 hours. He pays for the tickets and everything but he is unable to do the same trip for me. And the most painful is that if I do not visit him we will not see each other. He also wants me to lie to my dad so I can visit him more. I do not know what to do because I feel stupid for doing all that he wants but I do not do it then I feel even more miserable.o Please, give me an advice. I am young but not so much, I am 18 -- You're young . . . and tooyoung to be lying to your father about a guywho isn't putting any effort into having you for a girlfriend and lies to you. If he can pay for tickets for you to come there, he can pay for tickets for him to go to you. At best, he's a lazy boyfriend. Find a guy who will come to you and make you a priority. This is Lesson #1 for you in dating and finding a boyfriend. Look for men who make you a priority and won't ask you to compromise your relationship with your family and/or lie about anything. Go out with your friends and have a good time while this guy is away. When he comes back, you tell him you are moving on and wish him well. These are hard words to hear at your age. But, I want to you to learn to teach people/men how to treat you and to expect a little more from a boyfriend. This will not be your last boyfriend. I don't want you to be visiting this dating advice site in a few years trying to figure things out in your dating life all the time.
PogoStick Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 My advice is to end the relationship and do not date for 3 more years. You're not ready.
Redhead14 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Carli, I think you should take some time to read some of the posts from women who post here who are 30, 40, 50 years old and are still allowing themselves to be used and confused by men. Now is the time for you to start thinking of yourself as a valuable, smart, independent woman with a life of her own and if a man wants to spend time with you, he needs to value that as much as you do. 6 hours of your time, 3 there and 3 back, is a lot of time that could be spent doing something fun and interesting. If you want to see for yourself just how important your boyfriend thinks you are . . . ask him to compromise at least and live up to his promise to visit you. His answer will tell you a lot . . . if he does that for you, great! If he doesn't, it will hurt a little, but you'll have a clearer picture for yourself and undert
Redhead14 Posted December 4, 2015 Posted December 4, 2015 Carli, I think you should take some time to read some of the posts from women who post here who are 30, 40, 50 years old and are still allowing themselves to be used and confused by men. Now is the time for you to start thinking of yourself as a valuable, smart, independent woman with a life of her own and if a man wants to spend time with you, he needs to value that as much as you do. 6 hours of your time, 3 there and 3 back, is a lot of time that could be spent doing something fun and interesting. If you want to see for yourself just how important your boyfriend thinks you are . . . ask him to compromise at least and live up to his promise to visit you. His answer will tell you a lot . . . if he does that for you, great! If he doesn't, it will hurt a little, but you'll have a clearer picture for yourself and understand something about what you should look for in a boyfriend for the future. He's very young also and he will learn something as well -- how to treat a woman. Think of it as "taking one for the team"
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