lostsoul6486 Posted December 3, 2015 Posted December 3, 2015 It'll be two years in January. I'm doing a lot better. I've posted here about how I've dated a couple of girls since the break up but I've never let them get too close. I've been guarded so I eventually just stopped dating altogether. About a month ago, I got into online dating. One of my friends convinced me to give it a go. I joined a site mostly just to humor him. I've gotten a few girls' numbers and chatted them up but haven't gone on dates with any of them; however, I started chatting with a girl last week who I've felt a little connection with. She's also been really persistent with reaching out to me on the days I don't take the initiative. We've texted every day for almost a week now and have a date set up for Friday. As a matter of fact, the date was just solidified today. I've had the occasional thoughts about my ex as usual, but I realized that I hadn't thought of her at all since I started talking to this girl. The thoughts have been a lot less frequent and painful since before as well which is good. I've been thinking about her a lot today though. Idk why. Just one of those days I guess. Haven't had one in a while. Thought I was over them. It was a horrible day. I didn't text the new girl, but she reached out to me and it brightened my day up. We talked anout all kinds of stuff and it pulled out of the dumps. It feels good to feel wanted even if it's by someone I haven't met in person yet. I'm really excited to meet her this weekend and she seems to be excited to meet me too. How do I know if I'm over my ex though? Is it not normal for me to still think of her? Tl;Dr: Talking to a new girl. Still think about my ex though not as much. Had my first down in the dumps day in a long time. How do I know if I'm over her?
ennui Posted December 3, 2015 Posted December 3, 2015 I read a book before, and it talks about parallel emotions. For example, a mum would forever moan over the loss of her dead son but that doesn't mean that down the road, she would not be able to feel happy about seeing a flower blooming. It is possible for her to to be sad over her loss and be happy at the same time. Your ex. She would probably hold a place in your heart forever, you would probably love her in a way forever. But there are many friends of mine who told me this. I love my ex, but I know I would never want to get back with him/her. It is possible that you still love your ex, and today is just one of those days where your heart or brain decides to be emotional. But do you still pin hope for her? Because judging by the way you sound, you spend most of your time being excited about this new girl, than being upset about losing a future with your ex. And I think that's good enough. I met a guy who ticked all the things I want in a boyfriend and he is interested in me. But I'm still spending most of the time being upset over my failed relationship and honestly, I can't garner any excitement or any emotions towards this new guy... so if I'm you, I'll take it slow with the new girl and not let the ex be a determining factor but more of what is between you two.
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