Should I go to a family Christmas dinner in a few weeks where my ex will be and some

[MiaMckenz]

We're both in our late 20's. My ex-boyfriend ended our relationship aboout 2 weeks ago for the following reasons: (1) his financial situation sucks (really sucks) and he's overwhelmed now because he can't provide for me or basically do anything for himself. He said that he wants to get himself together financially before he can be in a relationship again. (2) He feels like he needs to "redefine" his identify as a man. Meaning, he's been in a relationship for so long; he was with his ex for 3 years and then we started talking basically right away. So basically, it seems like he needs to "find himself". I didn't agree with him of course, but I learned to accept his decision. He says that he knows he wants to marry me, but he needs to set himself up first and he's okay with me dating other guys in the meantime. In my opinion, it just seems like he didn't live the single life long enough. I was dumb in this situation because i still hung out with him since I love him very much. This situation really really hurts. So now he's using Tinder and flirting with girls on there, but still calling me. It hurts. I just blocked his number yesterday so i don't see his calls. Yesterday i was on the phone with him and I told him that either he can try to focus on us or keep talking to girls on Tinder. He chose Tinder. He said that he can't give me a relationship right now because of where he's at in his life. So he's still using Tinder everyday. He's now setting up dates with girls on Tinder. He also wants me to let him know when I do go on a date and he would the same. Now, his sister is married to my cousin and they're having a Christmas dinner in a few weeks. She invited me, and of course him, his family and a few my family members (since she is married to my cousin). I'm thinking about not going cause I know it's going to be very hard to see him, but at the same time my family will be there. Thoughts?

[mightycpa]

Small world where you live, ain't it?

 

I'm a West Virginia guy, a West Virginia boy.

West Virginia is my pride and joy!

West Virginia's good enough for me!

I'd skip the Christmas dinner, and let him know that you certainly won't be talking to him about your love life or anything else, and that you don't want to hear anything about his life.

 

It's a little strange how he wants to set himself up financially (he's not wrong about that) but he's plenty willing to snag some girls on Tinder, which probably means spending some money to go out and party.

 

Oh, and have you drawn the family tree if you get together with this guy? Ewww.....

[d0nnivain]

Assuming this is not on Christmas Day itself, I would not go. It's his sister but only your cousin so he gets "priority". If anybody asks & you know them not to be gossips, just say it's too hard to see him right now.

[basil67]

Wow, got to give him an award for trying to string you along.

 

Go 'No Contact' with him - it's the best way to get over him. And don't go to the event.

[mrwigand]

There is so much this guy says that doesn't make sense. He "knows" he wants to marry you, but right now he has to go through this process of dating other girls? It doesn't track to me. Then, he has some notion that he'll tell you when he sets up dates and you'll do the same! That's perverse. Don't play his game.