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Pace of Relationship Development


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Posted (edited)

I met my girlfriend through OkCupid and have been dating her for about 3 weeks now. Had an exclusive talk after only one week and asked her if she was sure she didn't want to meet anyone else first because I was the first person she had met. We were very a high % match on there.

 

We both want this to be something that lasts, and have talked about taking it at a pace which has been tough because we connect so well. An example is how every time I wanted to tell her "I love you", I reworded it in ways like "I think you're beautiful". She knew what I meant and did the same, but a few nights ago I slipped up and said it right before bed: "I love you"! Not awkward at all, and actually a good memory because of how it happened.

 

I've been sleeping next to her about 3x a week after week one, said "I love you" after 3 weeks, and complete action in bed will certainly start soon! (Just timing of period after 2 weeks.) We're both quite close and comfortable around each other. Spend multiple days together with no awkwardness even while just living by cooking and cleaning.

 

Thoughts on how this has played would be appreciated. I just think it's surprising I have a girlfriend after less than a month that's at the point of meeting family and so close to me!

Edited by Ic1
Posted

I mean if it works for you and it comes naturally then so be it.

 

I'll admit though, I'm naturally a pessimist because I'm tainted by social network and seeing every other person proclaim their undying love for someone they just met every other week. It's redundant.

 

Just proceed with caution and don't ignore warning signs. We tend to be blinded and overlook them when things happen quickly.

Posted

Are you not concerned at all about the flame burning out as fast as it was started?

 

I would have a mutual talk to slow things down a bit.

 

Wow, three weeks in and the I love you...

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Posted
Are you not concerned at all about the flame burning out as fast as it was started?

 

I would have a mutual talk to slow things down a bit.

 

Wow, three weeks in and the I love you...

 

The friendship fire* only grows with the time I spend with her, and I'm not concerned at all when I'm with her. But the reason I even started this thread was considering how I'd think of it from a 3rd person perspective. As you're thinking.

 

We have talked about it in the beginning and recently. But I think there's some truth to OkCupid saying we had 97% match and only 3% enemy. It's hard not to 'clique' with her more and more. I'm sure she's not luring me on as well.

 

*"Love is friendship on fire". I heavily believe in the truth to this saying, and one present I mean to give her sometime (not too soon) is a preserved yellow and red rose. Yellow is the color of rose for friendship, and red is obvious. I haven't said I love you often, and will always keep it to being something that has meaning by saving it for special moments.

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