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When should I contact her after first date?


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Posted

I had a date with a girl I met on OKC. We had been texting for 3 weeks (couldn't meet earlier - totally legit circumstances), and we had a date yesterday afternoon. We talked for almost three hours, and it seemed to go well.

 

I want to reach out to her. I am thinking this evening. I already know that I want to text her that I had a nice time last night, and maybe ask her to get together, depending on her response. I have just been reading articles saying I should text her immediately, but my gut is telling me to give her a little time to breathe, because:

 

a) she met me online, and I'm a complete stranger

 

b) considering "a)", a three-hour talk like that can be quite a lot when starting from scratch, and I want to have it sink in for a little bit.

 

When I started dating in the late 90's/early 00's, there was a three-day rule, but things kinda changed since texts came around. I am thinking of texting her tonight. Do you guys think that about 36 hours, considering the above situation, is a good amount of time to wait? Or should I do it sooner/later?

Posted

Sounds just great, you've left her space for a day (where she possibly daydreams of your date), and communicate soon enough to make her secure in your interest.

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Posted
I had a date with a girl I met on OKC. We had been texting for 3 weeks (couldn't meet earlier - totally legit circumstances), and we had a date yesterday afternoon. We talked for almost three hours, and it seemed to go well.

 

I want to reach out to her. I am thinking this evening. I already know that I want to text her that I had a nice time last night, and maybe ask her to get together, depending on her response. I have just been reading articles saying I should text her immediately, but my gut is telling me to give her a little time to breathe, because:

 

a) she met me online, and I'm a complete stranger

 

b) considering "a)", a three-hour talk like that can be quite a lot when starting from scratch, and I want to have it sink in for a little bit.

 

When I started dating in the late 90's/early 00's, there was a three-day rule, but things kinda changed since texts came around. I am thinking of texting her tonight. Do you guys think that about 36 hours, considering the above situation, is a good amount of time to wait? Or should I do it sooner/later?

 

You should do it sooner than later. I'd call her though and say you had a nice time with her and ask her for date. Be specific with plan, place, time. If she declines without offering an alternate, I'd move on.

Posted

I would message her tomorrow morning. Don't do it ASAP because it'll show too much interest, and that's unattractive. Another way to put it; clingy, easy to get, or dependant on her. It would also give her time to think about her time with you.

 

Basically, don't send a text an hour or two after saying bye. Let a relationship develop and grow. Not flash and disappear.

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Posted
I would message her tomorrow morning. Don't do it ASAP because it'll show too much interest, and that's unattractive. Another way to put it; clingy, easy to get, or dependant on her. It would also give her time to think about her time with you.

 

Basically, don't send a text an hour or two after saying bye. Let a relationship develop and grow. Not flash and disappear.

 

So you mean about 48 hours after the date?

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Posted
You should do it sooner than later. I'd call her though and say you had a nice time with her and ask her for date. Be specific with plan, place, time. If she declines without offering an alternate, I'd move on.

 

Yes, about being specific, but I feel kind of equal forces between us. She seems strong, yet considerate of what I want, based on our conversation yesterday (though I understand the sample size is tiny). I'd like to also take her temperature, and then make a choice.

Posted

I would do it this evening. When a woman is interested, she wants to hear from the guy very soon after their date. Waiting too long indicates lack of interest to most women.

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Posted
So you mean about 48 hours after the date?

 

Depends on how the date went and timing with schedules. Assuming mon-fri 9-5 schedules: You're afternoon date happened on saturday with a great time, send her a text sunday morning. 12 hours because it's all 'free time' for her.

 

If it was an wednesday evening date, send her a text thursday after work or friday morning and see if she wants to do something friday night. 24-48 hours because it's the same amount of 'free time' as the sat-sun date.

 

This is based on her having a certain amount of time to digest your time together.

Posted

I met my BF on POF. I actually texted him *OMG, the horror* right after our first date (within an hour) saying thank you and I had a great time.

 

We haven't stopped texting since. It's been over 2 years.

 

If you want to contact her, do it.

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