Truth34 Posted December 13, 2015 Posted December 13, 2015 That's good for the first 3 dates. Not for 2 ongoing months. It's ridiculous. I wont argue with that.
Author misty1114 Posted December 14, 2015 Author Posted December 14, 2015 I agree. You both seem fairly inexperienced at dating. He's planning dates, asking you out, and paying for dates. No guy continues to do this week after week after week just to have something to do. He likes you...and likes you enough to be worried about offending you and ruining things by moving too quickly. That's why he asked if he might kiss you. He's unsure about how you feel about him. Throw the guy a few signals that you're interested. By your own admission you don't flirt or give him any signals. Look in his eyes and smile whenever he speaks. Banter playfully with him. Play around with his hand as you talk. Touch his forearm casually as you make a point. Walk close to him. There are countless ways to flirt and/or let him know that you're open to a kiss. The chocolates during finals was a thoughtful gesture...and a golden opportunity to flirt by sharing one with him, or just kissing him as thanks. As for texting? Maybe he's not a texter. Try other communication modes. Or better yet, have a conversation with him the next time you see him in person about communicating between dates. I have offered to pay for some of the dates and he let me. On our last date, I asked if he wanted to hold my hand so he did (enthusiastically). I also need to mention that I have done a lot of planning for dates actually. He would ask me out but then he'd often leave it up to me to pick where we go or what activity we do. When I do ask him for his suggestion, he does try to come up with something and he'd make reservation for us or look up directions, etc. I think I agree with the others that maybe he's the beta/non-aggressive type as well. I'm fine with that since he hasn't asked for sex yet. The only thing that boggles me is the lack of communication. I'm kind of inexperienced at dating so I can't tell if he's playing games or he's just bad in general. But I also want to note that his texting habit has been the same since the beginning though.
LydiaLong Posted December 14, 2015 Posted December 14, 2015 I think you should stop over analyzing it. Be cheerful, but be unavailable the next time he asks you out.
SwordofFlame Posted December 14, 2015 Posted December 14, 2015 Regarding texting, someone said it's normal to not text frequently after the first 1-3 dates. I would agree. However in this scenario, even though you've been dating for about two months now, not much has happened. You might as well still be in that 1-3 date area. Are you okay with where you are at and the overall pace? If you're right about him being a beta male/non aggressive guy, you might have to be the one to escalate. Otherwise this may very well go nowhere.
angel.eyes Posted December 14, 2015 Posted December 14, 2015 Okay, he's doing less than I realized. I'm still of the mindset though that he's a clueless, inexperienced dater. But that's neither here nor there. You're going to have to decide what you need in a dating partner. There is no right or wrong answer per se, just what's right or wrong for YOU. I personally need a guy who communicates with me at least daily. So, date#2 would never have happened, were I in your shoes. I also need a guy who takes charge and is able to plan dates. So, again, I personally would have walked away a long time ago. But that's me and what I need. What do you need? Figure out what you require of a dating partner? What makes you feel happy, secure, and comfortable in a relationship? What traits are important? Does this particular guy meet your relationship needs? These are all critical questions in figuring out if he's right for you.
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