Guitaristangel Posted November 24, 2015 Posted November 24, 2015 Today, I have done NC and it has started to make me realize that my recent ex MAYBE my first love. Now, only being 25 and having my first long term relationship makes me realize that love is really hard to replace. As of now, I spoke to my mom stating that she reached out to talk to my ex over text messaging and before I knew, my ex started to call my parents. My mom and her were close and with my ex's family situation, my ex HATES her family with a passion. Anyways, my mom stated(this is her intuition) that my ex still misses me and is still waiting for me to CHANGE. However, the answering machine caught most of the conversation, from the best of my memory she stated something COMPLETELY opposite from what my mother tells me. The ex states she will talk to me in a year. She says she broke up with me because I didn't change. She said hesitantly she does not miss me. She says that she wanted me to let her go. She wanted to see my mother because she was "in the area" but couldn't because I was home. There was more, but I couldn't remember. I am asking for the love of my sanity, I am in need of a different perspectives on this. I am moving on and it doesn't hurt as bad as it did before but I am not ready to date yet. As of now, I'm getting a better paying job, studying in classes and getting kick butt grades and befriended a number of people who support me in my recovery in my church. I am having a blast with friends and it seems like the days are getting brighter each day. I do have my days where I do miss her. And with the holidays coming up, I miss having to spoil someone. My confusion lies within her because she says she is done with me entirely but yet she still talks to my mom, my best friends and even asks what I have been doing! All my friends are saying he is moving on. I am moving onto better things. She maybe my first love but after NC, I feel like a lot of NEGATIVITY has gone away from my life. I am a naturally optimistic and happy person. She may say I need to change, but I think she maybe the one that needs the changing. She lives in a house with family she hates. She is doing a job she hates as well and the only free day she has is 1 day a week. She lives for the "weekends". That isn't living. That's just securing your own death to me. I still care about it but in the long run, the past is meant to be accepted. Thoughts please
mightycpa Posted November 27, 2015 Posted November 27, 2015 My thought is that if you're not sure she's your first love then she isn't. That's ok. You're right about the rest of it. You need to be happy with yourself first, and you can't be that if you're with a person who isn't happy with their life.
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