Honey565 Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 Hello guys, i have one big dilemma. I have recently met a guy over internet. From the first moment we have started chatting he seemed impressed with me, saying how he has wonderful opinion of me and we have texted for 2 days. When we have finally met, i liked a lot what i have seen. He was very handsome, well dressed and perfect gentlemen. He walked me down to the car and kiss my hand. After that, we were constantly texting and talking over phone. We have perfect communication, he was very open to show how much he was impressed and he does everything right. Then new dates followed, second, third, forth, fifth...everything was just perfect, many hours, conversations, he acts like real gentlemen, takes care of me, shows lots of attention, everything he does and says is good...but after many dates, he still didn't kiss me. And i start to wonder, is this real? I mean, i have many years of experience and i know how usual guy is, and i have never met such a combo of so handsome, good looking male and behaving in such way to try to win me so much. And still that lack of physical contact after so many dates is also suspicious. I know that people will say that i should relax and enjoy, and i do, but just that i find it extremely strange. On the first look he has so many qualities that with much less effort he could win almost any girl. I look nice, but he does also. Looking good, good car, good job, perfect gentlemen and seems so respectful and interested in me? In the beginning i told him that i like things to go slow in the sense not to rush into anything, but we are in mid 30-ties, and going out for a month and seeing so many times, one little kiss could not ruin anything. It is clear we like each other and that i am very interested, no doubt in that. What do you guys think?
Author Honey565 Posted November 20, 2015 Author Posted November 20, 2015 How long have you been dating for ? We went out 6 times, and we met one month ago.
PogoStick Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I think you should kiss him if you feel it's time. 1
Ic1 Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I think you should kiss him if you feel it's time. Ditto. You make the move.
Robratory Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 It's hard to say what's going on because we don't get the tone of what you've talked about and texted. One possibility is that you've just never signaled to him that it was ok to kiss you, so he keeps taking you out, hoping you'll give him some sign that you'd welcome a kiss. That happened to me once. We went out for six weeks. Everything was laughter, jokes, and fun, and we went lots of places, but she never stopped acting like a sister. She gave off zero romantic vibe. So finally I did what you should consider doing -- talk about it. In my case, it turned out that she wasn't interested, but I wasn't a jerk, and she did have a nice time, so as long as I continued asking her out, she'd keep going out. I was disappointed but at least I didn't have to cook up scenarios in my head. You could just blurt it out. If you're sitting and talking, ask him, "Hey, how come you've never kissed me?" Sure, the answer might disappoint you, but then you'll know, and you won't be tormenting yourself.
Gaeta Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I'm sorry to say but I think he is fully aware of what a amazing lady you are but he doesn't feel sexual chemistry. He keeps dating you in the hope chemistry will grow between you but if it's nere after 6 dates it will never be. ot th Next date dress up real sexy and if it doesn't get him going I think that's your answer.
Robratory Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I'm sorry to say but I think he is fully aware of what a amazing lady you are but he doesn't feel sexual chemistry. He keeps dating you in the hope chemistry will grow between you Now I realize this is the opinion of just one guy, but I really don't think that's the case. That just doesn't sound like male behavior. Unless we have issues of our own, if we're there, we're interested enough for sex. It really doesn't take that much interest on our part to have sex. And if we're not even interested enough to have sex, why would we continue taking her out? That's a lot more work than just having sex. I think it's more likely that this guy is very, very timid. 1
xcupid Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 He might be: Shy or unsure or respectful. Have you flirted with him and encouraged him to kiss you? You might have to make the first move in this case.
Author Honey565 Posted November 21, 2015 Author Posted November 21, 2015 Hello guys...thanks for all your answers. After last night and another date i a row without kiss, i definitely think that something is wrong with him and i will call it quits. There is something big missing here and i have realized that he is trying to impress me with other things but definitely doesn't want to go physical . There were so many signals and you don't have to be very intelligent to realize that a girl who keeps on going out with you, met you on site for online dating looking for boyfriend not friend is opened for a kiss and relationship. So, girls, keep your eyes open. If he is trying had to impress you, too romantic, too attentive, there is something big missing there. Do not look for excuses.
Peachland Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 Why do you talk to him about it? He may be trying to be on his best behavior because he really likes you but is obviously going overboard. I'm not sure I would give up so easily if he has all these great qualities. I stopped dating someone who didn't kiss me after 4 dates. When he asked why I told him the reason and he was kicking himself because he thought I wasn't ready for a kiss. He asked for another date but I lost interest by that point. It was too late. Some guys are shy in the beginning and I learned to let them know it's ok to kiss me.
BluEyeL Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 I think you should kiss him if you feel it's time. Yeah! This is what I did when my boyfriend did not kiss me until date 7. I kissed him.
GemmaUK Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 I think he has listened to and respected your wishes when you said you wanted to go slow and not rush things.
Lois_Griffin Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 Hello guys...thanks for all your answers. After last night and another date i a row without kiss, i definitely think that something is wrong with him and i will call it quits. There is something big missing here and i have realized that he is trying to impress me with other things but definitely doesn't want to go physical . There were so many signals and you don't have to be very intelligent to realize that a girl who keeps on going out with you, met you on site for online dating looking for boyfriend not friend is opened for a kiss and relationship. So, girls, keep your eyes open. If he is trying had to impress you, too romantic, too attentive, there is something big missing there. Do not look for excuses. Personally, he sounds like he's gay but desperately trying to act straight by dating women. He wouldn't be the first guy to do this and he won't be the last. 1
Qboro90 Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 Hello guys...thanks for all your answers. After last night and another date i a row without kiss, i definitely think that something is wrong with him and i will call it quits. There is something big missing here and i have realized that he is trying to impress me with other things but definitely doesn't want to go physical . There were so many signals and you don't have to be very intelligent to realize that a girl who keeps on going out with you, met you on site for online dating looking for boyfriend not friend is opened for a kiss and relationship. So, girls, keep your eyes open. If he is trying had to impress you, too romantic, too attentive, there is something big missing there. Do not look for excuses. Not sure why you're throwing in the towel just like that for a guy who you described as the full package and who has so many great qualities. What's it hurt to go on one more date with him or ask him in person or even via text "am I gonna get a goodnight kiss this time or are you just an extremely religious guy that frowns about that kinda stuff" lol. 1
Author Honey565 Posted November 21, 2015 Author Posted November 21, 2015 Not sure why you're throwing in the towel just like that for a guy who you described as the full package and who has so many great qualities. What's it hurt to go on one more date with him or ask him in person or even via text "am I gonna get a goodnight kiss this time or are you just an extremely religious guy that frowns about that kinda stuff" lol. Because i personally feel that the image he is giving out is not real. Nobody can be so perfect, you live in real world. Somebody can be imperfect but perfect for you. Guy in his mid 30-ies could not be so shy or insecure, except having some major issue. I would go for gay theory or having some sexual issues.
Glitters Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 I too believe that he is respecting boundaries, nothing wrong. There are really good people in this world, you need to have an eye to look 1
Qboro90 Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 Because i personally feel that the image he is giving out is not real. Nobody can be so perfect, you live in real world. Somebody can be imperfect but perfect for you. Guy in his mid 30-ies could not be so shy or insecure, except having some major issue. I would go for gay theory or having some sexual issues. So because this guy is perfect... That's why you're not going to see him again? Makes sense. If I met Victoria Secret Model Adriana Lima tomorrow and she flirted with me and asked if I wanted to go to dinner with her... I'd say no too. She's too beautiful and there's no way she'd be into a guy like me with all she had to offer....... Not.. If you go out with him again and try to kiss him and he won't let you. Then at least you know something is off instead of just assuming that because he's so great, there's gotta be something wrong with him that you don't know about yet. There's nothin to lose.
d0nnivain Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 Honey565 I was about to dump DH because he didn't kiss me on our 1st two dates. If he hadn't kissed me on our 3rd that would have been our last. I do have concerns about how may times you used the word "perfect" to describe your initial interactions. I fear you set up unreasonable expectations in your world. I'd also be very leery of anybody who told me they held me in such high esteem after barely meeting me.
Recommended Posts