I don't get it.

[Howlinwolf69]

My friends and I are regulars at this bar. There' this bartender there that I really like. She's kinda trashy though. She was really friendly and cool with me until her male friend told her that I liked her.

 

After that she started acting all bitchy and weird with me. Acted like she was scared of me and stuff like that. It kind of eroded my confidence when she started acting like.

 

I decided to take a break from going out to that bar for about 3 months.

When I came back she was hugging all over me and stuff like that. She hugged me bye one night then I guess I made the hug last too long or something, now she is back to acting all bitchy and distant again.

 

But, she is always loving all over this friend of mine who is a fat bald Hawaiian looking guy with manboobs bigger than hers. He is always kissing her on the head and stuff, and I'm like really?...That's disgusting.

 

Thoughts?

[d0nnivain]

In her line of work, her tips go up when she flirts. But there is a bright line she won't cross & that is the bar itself. She's perfectly happy to flirt with you or anybody else across that bar but has zero interest in dealing with you or dating you once she's off work. Once she realized that you mistook her flirtation for genuine interest as opposed to a kind ear & a ploy to get more money from you, she ran in the opposite direction.

 

 

Let her pour you drinks. Stop thinking there is anything else there.

[ASG]

Yeap, seconding Donni's post. She flirts for tips. The friendlier you are, the better the tips!

 

Best example of this was once in New Orleans. I was there on an overnight with the cruise ship I worked on. Went out with friends. We were bar hopping. At one point we went to this bar, expecting to have ONE drink there, before moving on. The bartender was so friendly with the 4 of us we ended up staying all afternoon and you bet we tipped her very nicely. Wouldn't have happened if she was just competent at her job.