LilaMarie Posted November 16, 2015 Posted November 16, 2015 Well I've only talked to her for 3 days so far...I inly work with her on the weekends. I'll ask her by Saturday or Sunday. I just thought maybe it was too soon? It's NEVER 'too soon'. This lets her know what your intentions are. That is a mistake lots of 'nice', insecure guys make. They think that if they befriend the person they like it gives them a better chance but you will most likely get friendzoned. Are You Lying Your Way to the Friend Zone?
Charlie Harper Posted November 16, 2015 Posted November 16, 2015 There was a Barista at my local starbucks that always flirted with me, I always laughed at her attempts because she wasn't even half my age!!, but she was so cute and had this wonderful smile, so one day after she greeted me I told her " You know what is wrong in all this flirting ? that I can't invite you coffee at Starbucks because its going to be so lame and boring!), she laughed and I told her "P.F. Changs next tuesday?" Be calm and LISTEN to her, make jokes about you not on her, don't push an agenda, IF SHE LIKES YOU everything will flow, women here on LS will not let me lie, if she likes you she will make sure you get the idea, by staring, by what they say, by the way the talk to you even some will go the extra yard and kiss you and send clear signals that want to be kissed. Be yourself, don't try weird stunts to impress her, and have a GOOD TIME, whatever that may lead.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 16, 2015 Author Posted November 16, 2015 Okay so I called her and she didn't pick up, I'm guessing she was working a double shift since she tends to do that. I sent her a text after letting her know it was me, no reply. So I asked a friend if he can call her for me to see if she gave me a wrong number or not, sure enough she picked up and it was her. He played it off like a wrong number but I was just wondering why she hasn't replied to me. Like I asked before, was it too early to call her? Again, I just had him call her to see if it was a wrong number or not.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 16, 2015 Author Posted November 16, 2015 Again I don't see or talk to her thoughout the weekend at all which is why I called her so 'early'.
ExpatInItaly Posted November 16, 2015 Posted November 16, 2015 Okay so I called her and she didn't pick up, I'm guessing she was working a double shift since she tends to do that. I sent her a text after letting her know it was me, no reply. So I asked a friend if he can call her for me to see if she gave me a wrong number or not, sure enough she picked up and it was her. He played it off like a wrong number but I was just wondering why she hasn't replied to me. Like I asked before, was it too early to call her? Again, I just had him call her to see if it was a wrong number or not. This is why I said you don't have confidence. Confident men don't pull a move like that. That is something a highschooler would do. Give her a chance to respond to you. Who knows if she was in the middle of something when you called and it wouldn't have been a good time to talk. If you don't hear from her, try calling again to set a place for your date and the time you will pick her up. But sending a text after you called her wasn't necessary.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 16, 2015 Author Posted November 16, 2015 Well I mean I am pretty confident. It was just weird how she seemed excited to give me her number and then to end up not answering or replying to my text. I imagined that she might've wrote her number wrong so that's why I asked my buddy to call her a few hours later. Knowing that she answered his (random) call and not mine is weird...like umm what? Should I call her again today tomorrow or Thursday. All I know is that when I asked her out for Friday she asked if it can be after 9. In the text I sent her after I just told her that it was me and that if she has places that she would suggest to go on Friday...
bluefeather Posted November 16, 2015 Posted November 16, 2015 (edited) Well I mean I am pretty confident. It was just weird how she seemed excited to give me her number and then to end up not answering or replying to my text. I imagined that she might've wrote her number wrong so that's why I asked my buddy to call her a few hours later. Knowing that she answered his (random) call and not mine is weird...like umm what? Should I call her again today tomorrow or Thursday. All I know is that when I asked her out for Friday she asked if it can be after 9. In the text I sent her after I just told her that it was me and that if she has places that she would suggest to go on Friday... hmm. ok so there seems to be a potential of her flaking out. Be prepared for her to ignore your calls now and flake out. It can happen, and it's better if you're ok with it now rather than later. It could just be that she is freakin nervous when you call. She might not know what to say. Give her another day and see what happens. also remember, if she does end up flaking, Her loss. Not yours. You did very well from all I've read from you so far. If this one doesn't work out, at least you succeeded in asking girls out. Very well done. Your next girlfriend will appreciate these skills you gained! Edited November 16, 2015 by bluefeather
Author Kylemopar Posted November 17, 2015 Author Posted November 17, 2015 (edited) So if she does end up flaking out on me should that be the end of me trying to take her out? Should I talk to her about it at work? I really kind of like her and I enjoy talking to her although it's only for a short moment since we're busy at work. I just don't know why she would flirt with me, say yes to when I asked her out, give me her actual number but not talk to me when I called and not answer my text. I understand that she may be nervous when I call....but how can you be nervous to reply to a text? Edited November 17, 2015 by Kylemopar
bluefeather Posted November 17, 2015 Posted November 17, 2015 So if she does end up flaking out on me should that be the end of me trying to take her out? Should I talk to her about it at work? I really kind of like her and I enjoy talking to her although it's only for a short moment since we're busy at work. I just don't know why she would flirt with me, say yes to when I asked her out, give me her actual number but not talk to me when I called and not answer my text. I understand that she may be nervous when I call....but how can you be nervous to reply to a text? I have no idea. I mean I can guess, but it's kind of pointless to guess. There could be many different reasons why people act certain ways. The only way that you will know will be when you talk to her face to face. That's why good communication is so important. If it's bad, it can bring up all this confusion, all these questions. If you really like her, I would advise you to let her do her thing and see what happens. At this point in time, neither of you are really obligated to be a certain way to each other. You guys are not dating; I might even say you guys aren't even friends... yet. Try not to have too many expectations from this girl yet. You barely know her. See what happens throughout the week and up to Friday. If you won't see her again for the whole week, I might try calling again maybe on Wed or Thursday to see what's up. If she ignores you all the way to Friday and basically stands you up, she's a tool and I would forget about her after that. That's not friend material or girlfriend material.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 17, 2015 Author Posted November 17, 2015 Good news, kind of. She just texted me saying that she was really busy working and that she meant to reply sooner. She says she's going to TJ on Thursday and wants me to wait for her response for Friday cause she's not sure what time she'll be back in Friday. I mean...I guess haha
Author Kylemopar Posted November 17, 2015 Author Posted November 17, 2015 I haven't replied yet, I'm gimme give it some time so I don't look 'desperate' by replying right away.
bluefeather Posted November 17, 2015 Posted November 17, 2015 Good news, kind of. She just texted me saying that she was really busy working and that she meant to reply sooner. She says she's going to TJ on Thursday and wants me to wait for her response for Friday cause she's not sure what time she'll be back in Friday. I mean...I guess haha I don't know what TJ means..? And waiting for a response for Friday? Um that's the day of the date. I'm confused. It's like she wants you to clear your entire day and night to wait for when she is available? That's not making a date... but maybe I'm missing what that message was. Again, I don't know wtf TJ is. I haven't replied yet, I'm gimme give it some time so I don't look 'desperate' by replying right away. Just some advice: Only children play games. That's what you're doing right there. If you want her time, text her back when she texted you. She can get busy again and take another day to answer your next text if it's late. It's not about appearing desperate. You're concerned. It's about being straight forward and finding out if she's legit about the date or not. Making another mistake here with only texting again... I would have called her ass as soon as that text came in. Or maybe just texted back, "Hey it's cool if you're busy. Let me know next time you can go out, maybe we can work out a better day." Bam. Case closed and I can move on to someone who actually wants to go out. Maybe I'm jumping the gun here, but again, I don't know the whole story, plus that's just how I handle things. My time is precious too and I won't let a girl waste it, unless she's worth it.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 17, 2015 Author Posted November 17, 2015 TJ is short for Tijuana, Mexico.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 17, 2015 Author Posted November 17, 2015 Basically she's going to Tijuana on Thursday and doesn't know what time she'll be back on Friday so she's gonna let me know if Friday still works...but by how things have been with her I don't think it will happen. Call me a pessimist haha.
bluefeather Posted November 17, 2015 Posted November 17, 2015 Basically she's going to Tijuana on Thursday and doesn't know what time she'll be back on Friday so she's gonna let me know if Friday still works...but by how things have been with her I don't think it will happen. Call me a pessimist haha. I'm not gonna call you a pessimist. Sound more like a realist. She said ya let's make a date for Friday and then changed it to a maybe. There could be more to it, maybe she really wants to hang out with you. I don't know. But personally, I don't wait around for people like that. Not answering calls or texts, but answering anonymous calls, making a date and then saying "no just wait for whenever I'm available" doesn't work for me. If she's worth it to you, cool. But I'm out.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 17, 2015 Author Posted November 17, 2015 Well this is exactly what she texted me at 8:40pm "Hey sorry I've bn working I meant to reply sooner. Can I let you know if Friday still works? I'm sorry it's cause I'm going to TJ Thursday and I'm not sure exactly what time on Friday I'll be coming back.'
ExpatInItaly Posted November 17, 2015 Posted November 17, 2015 Well this is exactly what she texted me at 8:40pm "Hey sorry I've bn working I meant to reply sooner. Can I let you know if Friday still works? I'm sorry it's cause I'm going to TJ Thursday and I'm not sure exactly what time on Friday I'll be coming back.' You could offer to reschedule and name a specific day/time. (ex. Saturday) You don't want to be waiting around all day on Friday to find out whether she's back or not.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 18, 2015 Author Posted November 18, 2015 I asked her if we could reschedule to Saturday instead and this is what she sent me. "Sorry not sure if that works. Can I just let u know when I am able to? Sorry." She's not interested in me is she?
Charlie Harper Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 Dont do anything,SHE WILL LET YOU KNOW the ball is on her side of the field, wait 5 days if there is nothing, move on!
ExpatInItaly Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 I asked her if we could reschedule to Saturday instead and this is what she sent me. "Sorry not sure if that works. Can I just let u know when I am able to? Sorry." She's not interested in me is she? No, she's not. I've never needed to let a guy know when I'm available when I actually wanted to go out with him. I'd have named a day, without hesitation. I don't blame you for being confused, given that she accepted your invitation. She isn't a straightforward person. Sorry OP, I wouldn't waste any more time on this one.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 18, 2015 Author Posted November 18, 2015 Well I would understand why she can't really name a specific date. She works two jobs. I asked her one day what's days she has off, she told me Fridays and Saturdays which was wired to me because we work together in the weekends. Maybe she's just really busy?
ZA Dater Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 Well I would understand why she can't really name a specific date. She works two jobs. I asked her one day what's days she has off, she told me Fridays and Saturdays which was wired to me because we work together in the weekends. Maybe she's just really busy? If you like someone you are going to make the time to see them.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 18, 2015 Author Posted November 18, 2015 It's just weird that someone would flirt with me, accept my invitation, and give me her number just to end up not being interested. She works two jobs gets out like at 9pm I suppose. She has told me that she's single and with no kids. At least she didn't just stand me up or just straight up not text me at all. She gave me reason why she 'might' not make it in time. She asked me if she can let me know 'if' Friday still works because she doesn't know what time she will be back. The last thing she told me was if she can just let know when she's able too. I'm not waiting in Friday anymore, I'm making different plans for my weekend. I would understand if I randomly met her at a bar but I met her at work, I WILL see her again and she must know that. So is she really busy or is she truly being a dick head? She's 24 so she might still be in the game playing phase.
Author Kylemopar Posted November 18, 2015 Author Posted November 18, 2015 So if she doesn't come back in time on Friday. Should I say anything to her at work? It's gonna be so awkward. I want to go out with this woman so much. Maybe I can get her interested, if she isn't already, as I chat with her at work. I don't like to brag but I do have a lot to offer her.
phineas Posted November 19, 2015 Posted November 19, 2015 Son, You've gone full potato over this girl. I can promise you that any guy she gets with will not give half a crap about her and make her show him why he should keep her around. You will end up chasing this woman until you turn into a bitter woman hater. Walk away. Find someone else. You are border line obsessive and starting to come off a little creepy.
Recommended Posts