vmoney Posted November 8, 2015 Posted November 8, 2015 So here's my story! i've liked this girl for 2.5 years at work. I've asked her out numerous times only to be denied everytime. We've texted like every day for like 2.5 years with me always holding out hope that she'll come around and she never has. So I finally stopped texting her and then 3 months later out of the blue she sends me my "breadcrumb", a really short text about finally making it to a rooftop bar i told her about a long time ago and how it was amazing. And that was it. I didn't respond. My questions: 1) was I correct in not responding, seems so no? Because she didn't even say, how are you or hope all is well, nothing of the sort, seemed like she was just seeking attention. 2) will these breadcrumbs come again? And if so, are there certain ones that i should not ignore and that i should respond to? Such as: Hope all is well, we should meet up for coffee. Thanks for any help, i really appreciate the insight, take care!
Wewon Posted November 8, 2015 Posted November 8, 2015 Personally I would have stopped bothering 2.5 years ago. If she's a coworker, play it safe and treat her as one. Meaning, if a male coworker was sent a text like that how would you have responded? 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted November 8, 2015 Posted November 8, 2015 So here's my story! i've liked this girl for 2.5 years at work. I've asked her out numerous times only to be denied everytime. We've texted like every day for like 2.5 years with me always holding out hope that she'll come around and she never has. So I finally stopped texting her and then 3 months later out of the blue she sends me my "breadcrumb", a really short text about finally making it to a rooftop bar i told her about a long time ago and how it was amazing. And that was it. I didn't respond. My questions: 1) was I correct in not responding, seems so no? Because she didn't even say, how are you or hope all is well, nothing of the sort, seemed like she was just seeking attention. I doubt she was seeking attention. seems like if she wants attention, she can get it anywhere she wants. She just doesn't want it from you. I think she just wanted you to know she visited that rooftop bar you mentioned and thought it was great. That's it. 2) will these breadcrumbs come again? And if so, are there certain ones that i should not ignore and that i should respond to? Such as: Hope all is well, we should meet up for coffee. Thanks for any help, i really appreciate the insight, You're mistaken if you think they're 'breadcrumbs'. She's never given you breadcrumbs. She's never given you anything, except the brush-off. If you're not dating her, have never dated her, and will in all likelihood never date her, then these are NOT breadcrumbs. She's just texting you as she would any friend. It's YOU who's reading way too much into this, because frankly, you've been hopeful all this time (in spite of numerous, frequent and unchanging rejections) that she would somehow, miraculously 'come round' to wanting you in her life on a romantic level. Her texting you about the bar was not "Hey, I really miss you, and would love to have you back in my life, because I really love the attention you gave me!" It was just her telling you she had been to the place you suggested. You're colleagues. You should never, ever EVER date a colleague. Very bad news, bad strategy and frankly a dreadful idea. If you want to be her friend - and ONLY her friend, and you really 'get' that that's all you'll ever be to her, then by all means, talk to her again. But don't get any hopes up, and don't put 2 + 2 together and make 37. She's just texting. Breadcrumbs? They ain't. 1
dumbass2 Posted November 8, 2015 Posted November 8, 2015 This is pretty easy. She only thinks of you as friend and not much of a friend at that. More like someone she works with and more of an acquaintance. She is not attracted to you romantically or she would be all over it. Sorry to be so blunt, but there has never been any kind of relationship here other than you work together. You've never gone out and she has always denied when you ask.
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