maryjaneholland Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Me and my boyfriend have been together for a year. We currently live together. I am considering moving out ASAP, but I can't find anywhere to live. I literally have no where to go. He keeps dropping into conversation how he is moving to Australia in four years (we live in the UK). His sister went to work there but now has decided to move there permanently. Because of this, his other sister now wants to move there with her husband. My boyfriends parents have now said if she goes, they'll go to. So now my boyfriend wants to go. The problem is he never includes me in these plans. He says the same thing over an over 'I'M moving to Australia in four years'. Never says 'we' or 'us'. I've let it go previously but it has upset me. Last night he said it again and I did not want to let it slide this time. He said he didn't mean to say it he wasn't thinking. Then says nothing is set in stone, it could go wrong and he may never go. Then he said, who knows, in four years time you may have left me. I said he constantly relies on us breaking up. He said he doesn't want to discuss it anymore. We didn't talk for a few hours and then he came to find me to FINALLY invite me into his plans. He said I'm not ruling you out of my plans (which was completely contradictory of we may have broken up in four years) and don't I want to move country someday? I said yes, but not necessarily to the other side of the planet. No offence to anyone, but Australia does not attract me whatsoever. I cannot compromise. I do not want to live there, at all. He is very close to his family so I sympathise that he would like to go with them. But I'm very close to my mum, and I already live four hours from her. I only get to see her a handful amount of times a year. She has no money. She could never get to Australia. I may not ever see her again. Not like that's important because it took him four months to reluctantly include me in his plans. He only invited me because I was crying. I'm so upset he doesn't see a future with us. I want to leave right now but I don't know if I'm talking out of anger. I think it's so disrespectful to pretty much say 'I'm moving in four years so see ya!'. I tried to talk to him. He refused to have the conversation. He does not understand at all why I'm upset.
PegNosePete Posted November 5, 2015 Posted November 5, 2015 Why are you considering moving out? Is it due to this issue or are there other reasons on top? The fact that he won't even discuss it like a mature adult is very worrying. In fact I'd say it's more of a red flag than the desire to move halfway around the world. Communication is key to a good relationship. My response to "I'm moving to Australia" would have been "well I'm not".
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