oberkeat Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Have you ever dumped your brain or go for someone better, more interesting, etc.? Or been the one that it happened to? Or been the one that did the "stealing" (for lack of a better term)? I'm just curious as to how common this is.
Michelle ma Belle Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Nope never to any of those questions. My relationships have all ended because we had outgrown one another for one reason or another. They ended organically and without any drama. I'm very proud of that. 1
deadelvis Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Tarzan swings fearlessly through the jungle, leaping from branch to branch, never looking down or worried about the fall, but Jane makes sure to have the next branch securely in her hand before she lets go of the previous one. 2
Author oberkeat Posted November 4, 2015 Author Posted November 4, 2015 Have you ever dumped your bf or gf for someone better, more interesting, etc.? Or been the one that it happened to? Or been the one that did the "stealing" (for lack of a better term)? I'm just curious as to how common this is. Correction in bold.
Gaeta Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 No never. I have always ended my relationships before exploring other options. Even when I discovered my ex was cheating on me, we had a house and some assets together so it took some time to separate, I did not date or look for someone else EVEN if he had someone else. I took time to solve my situation and moved out before even thinking of dating. 2
casey.lives Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 If have been dumped for someone else.. but apparently I WAS THE AFFAIR PARTNER. lol... i couldn't be happier to be out of that horrid nastiness..
Ami1uwant Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I havent. This is more common with those 18-27 and usually with women where they feel they must always have a bf. 1
maryjaneholland Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Yes. I was in a relationship with someone. He constantly stressed it was only a casual relationship. I begged and begged him to take me more seriously and every time he rejected me. This relationship went on for about 8 months. He physically abused me a few times. He used to start unprovoked arguments with me and make me feel awful. I then met my current boyfriend. I fell for him immediately. I got to know him over a space of a few months but was unsure if he liked me too. I decided to end my relationship anyway since I did have strong feelings for my current boyfriend anyway, despite not knowing if he liked me too. I asked him out about a week after I ended my last relationship. He said yes and here we are. Although, I don't know if it's been worth it anyway.
Myragal Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 No I am and always have been a one-man type of gal. Other men don't exist in my brain 'in that way' when I'm in a relationship. I have zero emotional or physical attraction except to my partner. Once a relationship is formally finished then some switch turns on and I become receptive to male advance. 3
RecentChange Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 (edited) I "dumped" someone, but we weren't that serious yet, we were dating, sex.... No "I love yous" were still in the "lets see where this goes" stage. It was weird with him, we could talk for HOURS and got along really well, but no "spark" and no chemistry in bed. I didnt pine for him when we were apart. He was perfect on paper, good looking. I felt like I was trying to make it something that it wasn't. And then I met someone I immediately fell head over heels for.... And had to tell him I met someone else. He seemed to take it fine - but I don't know for sure, I never talked to him again. Oh and the guy I left him for wasn't "better" on paper. The guy I broke up with had a better education, an amazing career, genuine and "nice" - a total catch for some other girl.... But "new guy" set me on fire...(and 14 years later I am still with new guy). That's the only time I have dumped someone. And the one time I was dumped he swore there wasn't anyone else. Every other break up was mutual growing apart. Edited November 4, 2015 by RecentChange 1
Ruby Slippers Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I've never broken up with one man to get with another. But once, during a relationship that was on the decline, I met somebody who was open about the fact that he had developed a crush on me. He was a musician and I was recording vocals on some of his music. The process of collaborating with him creatively was very emotionally stimulating. Creative fireworks all over the place. My boyfriend knew how well we got along, and knew he had a crush on me, because I was open about it. I offered to stop working with him because I didn't want it to be a threat to our relationship. But my boyfriend said our music together was really good, and he didn't want to interfere with it. I told my musician friend that we could work together, but he needed to keep it professional and not flirty. He did that for the most part, though now and then he'd make some dreamy comment. Some months later, my boyfriend left me. Incidentally, he's the only guy who ever left me, and I'm pretty sure he did it because he knew it wasn't working and we'd both be better off splitting up. Within a few months, my musician friend made his move. Ultimately that relationship didn't last, either, but it was a very romantic, storybook relationship while it lasted, and he was the first man who made me feel truly loved and adored. Some of the happiest and most memorable times of my life were with him. We're still pretty good friends, and we've collaborated on some projects professionally. He's made it clear he would take me back if I wanted to try again. But I don't think it's a good idea, as the reasons for our breakup are still there and probably won't ever change.
lilmissjava Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 (edited) It's common I assure you. The millions of articles and forums on GIGS tell us so. My ex did this. He found that the grass isn't greener and tried to jump back over the fence. I literally told him: "Sorry, your loss, and my pasture is just fine without you" and with that, he went back to the bad grass lol Edited November 4, 2015 by lilmissjava Typo
smackie9 Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Oh hell ya, but when I was a teenager......then I grew up. 1
RedRobin Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 My ex H cheated on me, confessed, and we tried reconciling. He didn't leave me for her. I ended the marriage when we failed to resolve our issues in a reasonable period if time. I had no man in the wings. Didn't date at all for almost two years. Flash forward to my fiancée who died.. He and I were dating for many years.. At one point, I told him we needed to put a life together, or go our separate ways... He shuffled around for months with no action... During that time, I met someone I was very attracted to. I told my then BF that it was now or never... Again, nothing. I broke up with him and dated the other guy. During that time, he begged me to get back together with him. I said no, he had enough time. I have no idea what he did during the time we were broken up. I continued to date guy number two for about six months, but it was clear there was no real future there, in spite of many things we had in common. I couldn't bring myself to be a politicians wife... Being in the limelight that way was not my cup of tea... Plus I had some doubts about his ability to be faithful. My former BF called me and asked me to marry him. I still said no, but asked him why now? He gave me lots of good reasons why he was hesitant before. That he had lived without me for six months and didn't want to be without me again. I had to admit I missed him too. I broke up with guy number two... And was officially engaged the following week. Less than a month after our engagement and him moving in with me, he died suddenly due to a genetic, undiagnosed heart defect. So, that's the whole story! You can't make that shyte up... Oh, to top it off... The guy I broke up with? He did eventually marry someone else. Shortly after he was married, they had some problems, and he tried to get me to have an affair with him. Dodged a bullet, I did.
mystikmind2005 Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I have never broken up with anyone in my entire life! Once i make a commitment to someone i 'shut down' my interest toward anyone else.... i could meet the most perfect women for me in the world and i would walk straight past and not even give it a second thought. How does that song go... 'love the one your with', that is my carved in stone belief - pity i cannot seem to find a lady with similar conviction! Does it count as a dumping under the circumstance where she dumped me and started talking about coming back and i said "no thanks"? I have done that a few times.... because i do not believe in wasting my time to build a relationship on shaky foundations. 1
kismetkismet Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I was a rebound for one guy and he left me for his ex (then tried to get me back one month later.. ya right) Other than that, no. There were never any other people involved in the breakups. It normally takes me a long time to attach to people so the chances of that happening while i'm already with someone are just non existent basically.
Myragal Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Oh hell ya, but when I was a teenager......then I grew up. So true. 13 years old. I met the guy many years later and I still felt guilty and apologized. We both had a laugh over it. My only excuse is that at 13 we had the social skills of a baboon.
dragonfire13 Posted November 6, 2015 Posted November 6, 2015 This thread has restored my faith in dating... when my last relationship was on the outs I had a feeling the dude was meeting up with other girls...he admitted he was "just talking" to other girls and "that's just the dating game". Glad to see that approach to dating isn't the norm :-)
kendahke Posted November 6, 2015 Posted November 6, 2015 Have you ever dumped your bf gf for someone better, more interesting, etc.? Or been the one that it happened to? Or been the one that did the "stealing" (for lack of a better term)? I'm just curious as to how common this is. No. I've never dumped anyone to be with someone else. Yes. I had this done to me. Because she is wealthy and I'm not.
GemmaUK Posted November 6, 2015 Posted November 6, 2015 No to all questions. I'm a strong believer in end something that is not good for you before even looking at someone else. 1
smackie9 Posted November 6, 2015 Posted November 6, 2015 I didn't dump one guy for another because I was in a toxic relationship....he was just better looking.....and that is what a 15 year old will do.
KatZee Posted November 7, 2015 Posted November 7, 2015 Yes, I've done this, and have had it done TO me. It's extremely common.
ravfour4 Posted November 7, 2015 Posted November 7, 2015 (edited) Yes, I have too much experience with this. My first ex of 2 years left me for a co-worker, then came back and left me for some random guy. She essentially had a fiancé when we first hooked up, I should have known better. She was all over me on multiple occasions, i tried to be distant knowing she had a bf, but I eventually just gave in. My second ex of 4 years left me for a co-worker, then came back and let me again for that co-worker, then broke up with him a week later. Hooked up with a girl who was engaged and in a 4 year relationship and later met the guy she was engaged to. She was all over me and I waited like 10 times before I just let her do what she wanted to me. I then left her for my first ex (when I took her back) Edited November 7, 2015 by ravfour4
joseb Posted November 7, 2015 Posted November 7, 2015 Nope never did it. Or even considered it really. But I've had it done to me.
Recommended Posts