Httm Posted November 3, 2015 Posted November 3, 2015 I'm not playing games, but I'm not going to do all the work either. It's a girl I've been out with 3 times, whether I see her or not again isn't the end of the world anyway! You are just making excuses. You cared enough to create and participate in 4 pages of forum posts but are too cowardly to simply text her a direct question which would give you your answer. You can't claim not to care after 4 pages of caring. "All the work"? Puuulease... 1
Author dangerbang Posted November 3, 2015 Author Posted November 3, 2015 You are just making excuses. You cared enough to create and participate in 4 pages of forum posts but are too cowardly to simply text her a direct question which would give you your answer. You can't claim not to care after 4 pages of caring. "All the work"? Puuulease... I've never had to do this before so I don't see the point in exposing myself to rejection like that. It's quite obvious where I stand with women usually, this one has left me clueless and this discussion hadn't helped much but I do enjoy your responses anyway.
hippychick3 Posted November 3, 2015 Posted November 3, 2015 If you think you can judge my character from a few forum posts, I get the sense you're reading too much into this thread and you should stay out of the discussion, please I have very good intuition and although I can't say what your character is, your reactions to certain posts and overall attitude tells me enough to come up with a possible hypothesis. No worries, I have no intentions of contributing further in this thread. Best of luck to you! 1
RedRobin Posted November 3, 2015 Posted November 3, 2015 I tend to go slower.. And am not super keen on sucking face with a guy I just met. I show my interest in other ways, and there IS affection. Sitting close to each other, walking arm in arm. Holding hands... These days, when I let a guy kiss me full on that early (within a few dates) they assume we will be effing by the next date or thereabouts. Again, guy is a near stranger still. Thanks OLDing!! Then every date after that becomes about when are gonna f*ck. Boring. If that is what the OP is used to, then I can see why her pace would throw him off. It is a shame that people who want to get to know someone before getting intimate is viewed as not interested. Although, I tend to view guys who need to move quickly as not interested... So maybe you two just don't share values or you aren't that into her... P.s. I also have a PhD... And I pay my share on dates. 3
Saracena Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I'm from Ireland. Modern courtship here, if both parties are into it, usually involves getting hammered followed by heavy petting/sex, from my experience anyway.. Over what time-scale?
Httm Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I've never had to do this before so I don't see the point in exposing myself to rejection like that. It's quite obvious where I stand with women usually, this one has left me clueless and this discussion hadn't helped much but I do enjoy your responses anyway. You've never had to be open and honest... Well, time to be a grown up then! Expose yourself to rejection? Is your self worth that low? The rejection, if any, already would have happened. Now, you are just asking for clarification. The problem is that you exposed the truth about yourself here. You don't want help. You want mind reading. You are too cowardly to be direct in a relationship. Let that sink in. You are dearly afraid of simply asking a direct question via text! The discussion helped plenty. You just have no intention of implementing what would absolutely answer the question you posed here. Like most advice seekers, you predetermined what you were willing to do(nothing) and want a magical solution.
StBreton Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 (edited) I'm not playing games, but I'm not going to do all the work either. It's a girl I've been out with 3 times, whether I see her or not again isn't the end of the world anyway! Wow that's a lot of whining. You're playing the "hedging your bets" game ... you're not being risky. C'mon ...risk is inherent in male DNA! Danger... how about you ask her out on one more date...to an intimate setting...and text her something flirty like "I'm dying to kiss you right now" I actually texted something like this to a guy I was on a second date with when he went to the men's room (we hadn't kissed at this point). He came out with a devilish grin on his face and really laid one on me. It was awesome! Edited November 4, 2015 by StBreton 1
Author dangerbang Posted November 4, 2015 Author Posted November 4, 2015 The saga continues. Date 4 tomorrow. 1
Versacehottie Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 I don't really know what you mean! I mean if all things are good except that she is going a little slow in the physical area of dating, well I think it would make sense to keep exploring it. For three reasons: *Good people who you are attracted to are hard to come by *Don't take dating so seriously that your ego is bent out of shape because your main measure of whether or not she likes you is how physical she is getting with you. It's been 3 dates not 10. *You are not completely taking yourself into the equation. My hypothesis is that there is something possibly awkward about your attempts to get physical as well. I wouldn't just blame it on one of the two people. good luck 1
smackie9 Posted November 4, 2015 Posted November 4, 2015 Sorry but not every girl is willing to tear off the panties within the 3 date margin. Some people do not throw themselves into a relationship and do take a more practical approach to actually get to know the person before being physical. IF you feel this girl is worth the wait go for it, but don't force the point of being physical because you don't want to keep it in your pants any longer. Nothing wrong with being randy to go BUT if that is what you are expecting, then you are dating the wrong girl. 1
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