NEVER tell a woman you lack success in dating??

[Male]

Most ppl like the idea that they got chosen specifically for who they are, and that they are the 'special one', not that they are the only viable option at that moment in time.

 

Exactly. I had a date tell me something similar and it was such a turn-off. It made me ultimately decide to never go out with him again.

 

Very true, I understand that. But anyone can lie and make the other person feel special.

 

Example: A guy goes out Friday night and hits on 5 different women. The first four say no, but the fifth gives him her number because she thinks he must be confident enough to approach her, and feels special because she assumes he singled her out of the crowd, but she was actually his last ditch effort.

 

Reality is not always what it appears to be! Each woman has her own perception of why she is attracted to a guy. And usually its a false perception. Many women tend to build a guy up in their mind, making him out to be much more of an amazing guy than he actually is. A lot of guys will shatter that dream if she stays with him long enough.

 

Just because I failed with other women doesnt mean that the woman sitting arcoss from me should be seen as the only viable option. You could turn it around as well. If a woman it constantly kissing frogs, and then finds a great guy that she likes, is that because he the best viable option compared to the frogs she was kissing????

 

The woman agreed to go on a date with me BEFORE she knew about my dating history. So obviously she saw something she liked. Guess what? Not everyone is going to like me, or want to date me, so why should a woman care if I admit that I crossed paths with women that werent interested???

Edited November 3, 2015 by Male

[xxoo]

It's about putting your best foot forward. You can lead with your failures, and maybe women shouldn't care, but reality is that attraction is largely about feeling good around someone. Spread the positive vibes for best results.

[carhill]

I dont understand why many women instantly black-ball a guy if he admits that he has trouble getting dates?

 

Who wants to desire the undesirable? Social dynamics 101. It's the same with any social milieu. That's why folks work social and political methodologies to be popular. It starts in childhood once one wanders outside the family home and interacts with strangers and ends when, well, one is dead.

 

There's no reason to discuss past success or lack with any particular person one wishes to date, rather focus on having success with them. Look to the future and live in the present, not the past.

[Male]

Who wants to desire the undesirable? Social dynamics 101. It's the same with any social milieu. That's why folks work social and political methodologies to be popular. It starts in childhood once one wanders outside the family home and interacts with strangers and ends when, well, one is dead.

 

There's no reason to discuss past success or lack with any particular person one wishes to date, rather focus on having success with them. Look to the future and live in the present, not the past.

 

 

So if a woman asks directly if youve dated since your divorce...and you havent really at all...what are you supposed to tell her?

 

"Sorry..I dont answer any questions that pertain to the history before we sat down at this table"

 

Many of you come up with answers that sound great on paper, but they dont usually work in reality.

Edited November 3, 2015 by Male

[carhill]

I did date since my exW and I split up and neither lady I dated asked about anything specific to my M or D other than a general question about how I felt about being married. I've found women I've dated and mated with rarely ask such pointed questions. However, anything is possible. If asked such a question these days I'd probably say something like I've been waiting all this time for you to come along sweetheart, so let's get started today.

 

It's just living, whatever happens happens.

[Male]

I dont think I've ever had a woman NOT ask me.

[xxoo]

So if a woman asks directly if youve dated since your divorce...and you havent really at all...what are you supposed to tell her?

 

"Sorry..I dont answer any questions that pertain to the history before we sat down at this table"

 

Many of you come up with answers that sound great on paper, but they dont usually work in reality.

 

"I haven't really connected with anyone it a while."

 

You can be honest that there's been no one without spilling your guts that your attempts have been unsuccessful. Like Mrlonelyone said upthread, you don't need to bare your soul to every new date.