Guyouthere Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 so, do women use the line "I have a boyfriend" to make a guy "seek them more" in conversation? Obviously some are sending the message they do have one, but I tend to think not all are telling the truth.
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 No. I think you'll find they use the line to put you off. If I'm being approached, tentatively or excessively, that's the line I will use to deter further attention... 14
kismetkismet Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 If anything it's the opposite. Either they are telling the truth because they do have one and don't want you to pursue them, or they are lying about it so that you will not pursue them. I have never heard of a girl faking a boyfriend to seek MORE attention. It's the easiest way to get someone to stop flirting with you when you don't feel like saying straight up "i am not interested in you" 5
Author Guyouthere Posted October 30, 2015 Author Posted October 30, 2015 I dunno what to make of it all. There was a girl at work who I know was interested in me in the past (she flirted, touched me a lot, etc.). She told me she "had a boyfriend", but how she acted and spoke was complete opposite from what you would expect from someone who was "blowing me off". Maybe it is a game to some?
RecentChange Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 But what if they do have a boy friend? I have been asked out by forward guys - and gave them a "hey thanks, but I am sorry, I can't, I have a boyfriend" I would never use that line to make someone seek me more, and if I wanted to flirt? I would avoid mentioning that I have a boy friend.....
RecentChange Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 Yeah it cane be a game - flirting can be fun / ego boosting, with no intent to close the deal.
Author Guyouthere Posted October 30, 2015 Author Posted October 30, 2015 maybe i just met a weird one then.
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 maybe i just met a weird one then. What makes you think that by using that line, she was actually "giving you a come-on"....?
Author Guyouthere Posted October 30, 2015 Author Posted October 30, 2015 What makes you think that by using that line, she was actually "giving you a come-on"....? because at the time she was all smily, had her hands all over me basically, flirty words. as said, that would indicate something else in her head, no?
kismetkismet Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 She probably actually does have a boyfriend, but either has a flirtatious personality or you're misreading signals. Either way, her telling you that she has a boyfriend means you should not move forward with anything unless she tells you otherwise. No matter whether she has a boyfriend or not in reality, telling you that she does is a clear indicator for you to not ask her out. 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 I dunno what to make of it all. There was a girl at work who I know was interested in me in the past (she flirted, touched me a lot, etc.). She told me she "had a boyfriend", but how she acted and spoke was complete opposite from what you would expect from someone who was "blowing me off". Maybe it is a game to some? Sorry, my bad.... I just saw this - ignore above question... This is a case of her being a bit unsure in her relationship with her BF. It sounds to me as if she used the comment to keep you at a distance, but might have been sufficiently disenchanted with her partner, to be content to flirt with other guys.... 1
Author Guyouthere Posted October 30, 2015 Author Posted October 30, 2015 Sorry, my bad.... I just saw this - ignore above question... This is a case of her being a bit unsure in her relationship with her BF. It sounds to me as if she used the comment to keep you at a distance, but might have been sufficiently disenchanted with her partner, to be content to flirt with other guys.... so basically I was "being used"?
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 Probably. But in a case where a woman tells you she's attached, the moment she begins flirtatious behaviour, you are perfectly within your rights to say "You're being very forward for someone who's told me she's in a committed relationship... Does your BF know you flirt this way?" She will either take umbrage and give you a wide berth from then on (at the same time finding some other guy to boost her ego and fill the obvious gap in her life) or - she will be quick to explain that her relationship isn't serious/she's having problems/he's not a definite~exclusive BF/they're thinking of breaking up..... 1
Author Guyouthere Posted October 30, 2015 Author Posted October 30, 2015 well in the case of this one, she met a new guy and is with him for his money (according to what her friend coworker has disclosed to me). Evidently she had "issues" with the ordinal "boyfriend"
fitnessfan365 Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 You'll never know whether or not a woman actually has a boyfriend when she says that. But to me it would seem like she's trying to discourage you either way. There's been select cases where I've heard about a woman using the boyfriend line as a test to see if a guy is persistent. Then when he acts like he doesn't care it wins her over. But that's too much game playing for me. The main rule I live by is always take things at face value. 1
Author Guyouthere Posted October 31, 2015 Author Posted October 31, 2015 Oh, quality.... thats a lot of what I encounter…. "quality". lol
neowulf Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 I dunno what to make of it all. There was a girl at work who I know was interested in me in the past (she flirted, touched me a lot, etc.). She told me she "had a boyfriend", but how she acted and spoke was complete opposite from what you would expect from someone who was "blowing me off". Maybe it is a game to some? Probably two factors at work here; 1) Some women are just naturally flirtatious without being concious of it, so they can often appear to give "false signals" 2) Men are often terrible at judging the interest of women they themselves are attracted to. E.g. You're seeing things that aren't there.
Author Guyouthere Posted October 31, 2015 Author Posted October 31, 2015 Probably two factors at work here; 1) Some women are just naturally flirtatious without being concious of it, so they can often appear to give "false signals" 2) Men are often terrible at judging the interest of women they themselves are attracted to. E.g. You're seeing things that aren't there. Its obvious she had something for me is she had her hands all over me in the past. The fact she is currently with a guy for his money, tells me that she is just a plain lowlife. 1
katiegrl Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 because at the time she was all smily, had her hands all over me basically, flirty words. as said, that would indicate something else in her head, no? She had her hands all over you while you were at work? Come on now.... 2
lino Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 A lot of women with boyfriends/husbands do still flirt and touch men. It's to see if they've still 'got it' There's been select cases where I've heard about a woman using the boyfriend line as a test to see if a guy is persistent. Then when he acts like he doesn't care it wins her over. But that's too much game playing for me. The main rule I live by is always take things at face value. I've seen that as well. So pathetic.
TaraMaiden2 Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 A lot of women with boyfriends/husbands do still flirt and touch men. It's to see if they've still 'got it' Or to see if YOU have.... Checking out the possible options...
ExpatInItaly Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 I have only ever used "I have a boyfriend" line when: A) I actually had a boyfriend B) I wanted to guy to back off Never have I used it as a means of getting more attention from a man. Not once. I think this woman either realized she was crossing a line or you misinterpreted he signals. Either way, the message is clear now. Cease and desist.
Lois_Griffin Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 I dunno what to make of it all. There was a girl at work who I know was interested in me in the past (she flirted, touched me a lot, etc.). She told me she "had a boyfriend", but how she acted and spoke was complete opposite from what you would expect from someone who was "blowing me off". Maybe it is a game to some? All you had there was someone with boundary issues, is all. She had a boyfriend but was still flirting and sending out vibes. That doesn't mean women purposely claim to have boyfriends to entice men further. It's quite the opposite. 2
BLND Posted October 31, 2015 Posted October 31, 2015 If she told you she has a boyfriend then She definitely is NOT interested by you. No matter how much flirting YOU think she's doing. She's not interested. Just because she's being nice doesn't mean she's into you. Some people are "touchy feely" and nicer than average and some men who tend to see signs everywhere think those women are flirting. Also I don't think it's right for you to call her a lowlife based on what someone told you. I also think it's none of your business why she's dating who she's dating. Just because she is not with you doesn't mean she's a bad person.
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