adiamond Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 (edited) I started seeing this guy for about 3 weeks. Nothing official, we have gone on probably 2 official dates and then met another 2 times around campus. He seemed really into me and started messaging me good morning and good night most night after our first date. He told me he missed me probably 3-4 times already. He was surprising me after class with flowers and chocolate because he heard I was having a stressful day and bringing me ice cream during my study breaks. He was basically acting like my boyfriend after the first date. I think it is very sweet but it was kind of fast for me and he seemed very into me. Lots and lots of compliments. He hung out with my best friend for a little bit and my friend said he was really into me and he kept saying that there were sparks for him on our first date, he thought I was really attractive, gushed about how smart I was and liked everything about me. I told him that I felt like we were going really fast and I felt pressure. He told me that there is no pressure on my part, that all he wanted to do was take care of me and pamper me and make me feel special. He is very sweet guy but things just feel off. I told him that I will be moving in a month and half out of the state and we shouldn't go down this path and I wanted to back up and be friends instead because we hadn't known each other long enough for me to develop romantic feelings. I felt bad that he was doing all these nice things for me and I wasn't feeling it romantically. He said that he wanted to keep going down this path and see what happens and when I move, we would deal with it when it came to it. Things just feel off and not right idk. Am I just being dumb? I know that I'm weirdly afraid to be emotionally and physically vulnerable after my past relationships. I know that we both have some differences, him being international and indian, he has a lot of cultural differences and differences in what we consider to be fun. I told him last night I would rather be friends and he was really upset and said that he can't do that at this point because he is likes me and has too many feelings for me to do that. What do you guys think? Edited October 29, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs
GemmaUK Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 I think you did absolutely the right thing. You felt a gut instinct, listened to it and acted upon it. The only thing I would say is don't as to be friends again. He isn't accepting of that so don't try to be friends. 2
Httm Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 You are moving. You made the right choice. Let it go.
hippychick3 Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Very mature decision to make that you shouldn't second guess. Always trust your gut. I would be wary of having a friendship with him though.
Author adiamond Posted October 29, 2015 Author Posted October 29, 2015 I told him that we should have space (like 3 weeks) and he can think about it and tell me his decisions on friends later. I said that there is no pressure and he can do what he feels is right for him. And yea, everything about this situation was telling me like bad idea going down romantic path with him.
Ruby Slippers Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 It doesn't matter if he's really into you if you're not into him. Since you're not feeling it, it's better to end this now than wait until he's even more smitten to let him go. Since he's so into you, he's right that it doesn't make sense to be friends. He would always want more and try to change your mind. He will have to learn to pace himself in relationships, as we all do. 1
lilmissjava Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 A stage 5 clinger is never a good thing. Nipping it in the bud now was the smart move.
xcupid Posted October 30, 2015 Posted October 30, 2015 I think he's infatuated and over the top. Too much, too soon. You already can see potential incompatibilities. Wise to not pursue it.
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