JasmineJones Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 I feel that for a relationship (long term, not just hookup) you need to connect with the partner at these 3 levels - mind, heart and body. The relationship I'm in is in its early stages. We connect very strongly at the mind level. We are also quite connected at the heart level. However, I've just realised I am not feeling connected with him at the physical sexual romantic level. We've not had sex yet but even when he talks to me he is not making me feel like a desired woman. He talks about obscure artefacts he is collecting (he is an academic) and regales me with tales of intricate academic stuff and his frustrations with his working life. In short, he talks to me like I am a fellow academic. He is the one who really wants to be in a relationship with me but this seems to be his relationship style. It would never occur to him to say something sexy or even give me a compliment. The conversation just feels.....dry. The kisses and smooches feel fumbling and awkward. I guess this can't change?
Imajerk17 Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 (edited) I checked. This is the 24th thread you've posted, in 4 weeks, about a guy you just started dating. That has to be a record. Are you always this anxious? You should be discussing your needs and concerns w him, not w us. Edited October 28, 2015 by Imajerk17
RoseWater Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 I feel that for a relationship (long term, not just hookup) you need to connect with the partner at these 3 levels - mind, heart and body. The relationship I'm in is in its early stages. We connect very strongly at the mind level. We are also quite connected at the heart level. However, I've just realised I am not feeling connected with him at the physical sexual romantic level. We've not had sex yet but even when he talks to me he is not making me feel like a desired woman. He talks about obscure artefacts he is collecting (he is an academic) and regales me with tales of intricate academic stuff and his frustrations with his working life. In short, he talks to me like I am a fellow academic. He is the one who really wants to be in a relationship with me but this seems to be his relationship style. It would never occur to him to say something sexy or even give me a compliment. The conversation just feels.....dry. The kisses and smooches feel fumbling and awkward. I guess this can't change? How long have you been dating him? You could talk to him about it but tbh it's really hard to change people.
PogoStick Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 I need to connect at the oak-tree-laying-roots-into-fertile-soil level. And yeah I'm sorry but this guy sounds like he doesn't have what you're looking for. 1
katiegrl Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Wait a second. You posted not too long ago that he was creeping you out big time, that you didn't feel safe. You even mentioned the word "stalked" in your posts a few times. Why on earth are you vstill dating him?
Author JasmineJones Posted October 29, 2015 Author Posted October 29, 2015 Wait a second. You posted not too long ago that he was creeping you out big time, that you didn't feel safe. You even mentioned the word "stalked" in your posts a few times. Why on earth are you vstill dating him? Different guy. I multi date.
crederer Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Wait a second. You posted not too long ago that he was creeping you out big time, that you didn't feel safe. You even mentioned the word "stalked" in your posts a few times. Why on earth are you vstill dating him? because she's paranoid
h0000 Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 I checked. This is the 24th thread you've posted, in 4 weeks, about a guy you just started dating. That has to be a record. Are you always this anxious? You should be discussing your needs and concerns w him, not w us. Wait a second. You posted not too long ago that he was creeping you out big time, that you didn't feel safe. You even mentioned the word "stalked" in your posts a few times. Why on earth are you vstill dating him? Im starting to think if OP is trolling. Either way Im so over her problems. 1
katiegrl Posted October 29, 2015 Posted October 29, 2015 Different guy. I multi date. Hmmm, that's weird, when did you start multi-dating? After you dumped the stalker? Nevermind, no need to answer, don't care.
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