cookiemonster26 Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 I have these friends I've known for quite a while like four years. Anyhow, they mentioned they wanted to talk to me about something as a group (two girls). I declined as I've done this before with them and felt a bit uneasy and like I was ganged up on ( I know that wasn't their intent, but it is an uncomfortable experience to sit with two people and have them talk about all these things you did wrong). Anyways. I politely refused talking as a group and suggested meeting up individually instead, but I was called selfish and not being an adult by doing this because the talk would be "uncomfortable for everyone". Then they told me that they wanted to talk to me and help me because "everyone is talking about me and my actions reflect on them" which makes no sense to me because I don't do anything bad or whatever, and I feel like other peoples opinions shouldn't shape how you feel about someone's friendship. I still wouldn't talk as a group and they told me the friendship is over because of it. Do you think this is even worth it for me? What are your thoughts.
Lostweekend Posted October 28, 2015 Posted October 28, 2015 So, let me get this straight. Your two "friends" want to talk to you about something uncomfortable in regards to your behaviour and that your actions reflect on them? I would tell them to p... off! You would prefer to meet them seperately but they won´t? If they were true friends who had good intentions they would meet you separately but they obviously need each other to have this talk! Who do they think they are? Your parents? Who are they to confront you in such a manner. There is such a thing as communication. If there is anything about your actions or something you said that upset someone, they don´t have to make it into an official event announcing their intention of "correcting or confronting" you. In my opinion, something seems slightly off in the dynamics of your friendship with these people. I would totally understand how you felt ganged up on and my advice is to have a good think about this situation (and previous ones) Do these people have your best interests at heart and do you really need them or are they using this to dominate you? Have a good think about it? You know who you are and what you say and do. If there is nothing to suggest that you should have this "talk / confrontation", then don´t!
Author cookiemonster26 Posted October 28, 2015 Author Posted October 28, 2015 So, let me get this straight. Your two "friends" want to talk to you about something uncomfortable in regards to your behaviour and that your actions reflect on them? I would tell them to p... off! You would prefer to meet them seperately but they won´t? If they were true friends who had good intentions they would meet you separately but they obviously need each other to have this talk! Who do they think they are? Your parents? Who are they to confront you in such a manner. There is such a thing as communication. If there is anything about your actions or something you said that upset someone, they don´t have to make it into an official event announcing their intention of "correcting or confronting" you. In my opinion, something seems slightly off in the dynamics of your friendship with these people. I would totally understand how you felt ganged up on and my advice is to have a good think about this situation (and previous ones) Do these people have your best interests at heart and do you really need them or are they using this to dominate you? Have a good think about it? You know who you are and what you say and do. If there is nothing to suggest that you should have this "talk / confrontation", then don´t! There is nothing that really stands out for me as something that they would need to have this huge talk confrontation with. I do suffer from depression and had an episode while on a trip and that was something that really bothered them because theta felt it was attention seeking. But I've been pretty good with controlling my depression and am always actively seeking help so ya I don't really see an issue. I also don't care what others think of me, so if what people think of me bothers them more than it bothers me then that's stupid. Thanks for taking the time to reply to my question
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